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A terrible tragedy: Dan Haubert of Ticketstumbler (fallentimes) has passed away

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Re: A terrible tragedy: Dan Haubert of Ticketstumbler (fallentimes) has passed away

#101

Post by ryanspahn »

brandnewlow wrote: post #30
bprater wrote: post #26

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Depression is an incredibly insidious disease folks, especially because sufferers normally keep it hidden from others. Some days you can feel completely fine, have amazing connections with people, love your work, be a completely present and loving parent and spouse. And on really bad days, it feels like the sky has completely collapsed on you and that the only logical thing to do is make the world a better place by l…

You keep it hidden because for every 1 person who takes your advice and helps you out there are 5 who will write you off as a serious person for the rest of your life. Edit: I'm not saying this is right/wrong, but there are real consequences to outing oneself as a depressive.

What?

"You keep it hidden because for every 1 person who takes your advice and helps you out there are 5 who will write you off as a serious person for the rest of your life.

Edit: I'm not saying this is right/wrong, but there are real consequences to outing oneself as a depressive."

What are the consequences? After dealing with OCD and social anxiety issues from 18 to 28, I finally started to open up and talk about these oddities that conflicted me to others. What I learned is most people I talk to all dealt with something similar. These were just random people I met at work, friends and family members. I wish I talked about what conflicted me before I was 28, I would have been able to enjoy that 10 year span of my life more.

What I am saying is don't think you are alone, think you are crazy the one dealing with ocd, social anxieties, depression - the majority has been there and when you learn/realize that we are the same a huge weight is lifted off your shoulders. In other words talk talk talk about your problems, oddities (obessesive thoughts or actions), social anxieties and depressive thoughts until you are blue in the face. If people are going to look down on you for being a depressive screw them, they are hiding behind their own wall of B.S. - no one is perfect and everyone has dealt with something from the above in various degrees before!

My condolences to Dan's family and friends.

Re: A terrible tragedy: Dan Haubert of Ticketstumbler (fallentimes) has passed away

#102

Post by someonesad »

You know.... I am crying now. Death seems to glaze at me every time I start wasting my life again. I know that this is stupid, but I just can't help it. I am terribly sorry. Really. The funny thing is that I don't even know this guy - but I really like him. Nietzsche said that suicide thoughts are a wonderful comfort - they help us get through a lot of bad nights... and you know, today - right now, actually - it feels good to be such a coward. It feels good to be incapable of taking my own life... no matter how stupid I am, no matter how fucked up everything and everyone is. I am really terribly sorry... I just don't know what to say.

Re: A terrible tragedy: Dan Haubert of Ticketstumbler (fallentimes) has passed away

#104

Post by brandnewlow »

ryanspahn wrote: post #101
brandnewlow wrote: post #30

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You keep it hidden because for every 1 person who takes your advice and helps you out there are 5 who will write you off as a serious person for the rest of your life. Edit: I'm not saying this is right/wrong, but there are real consequences to outing oneself as a depressive.

What? "You keep it hidden because for every 1 person who takes your advice and helps you out there are 5 who will write you off as a serious person for the rest of your life. Edit: I'm not saying this is right/wrong, but there are real consequences to outing oneself as a depressive." What are the consequences? After dealing with OCD and social anxiety issues from 18 to 28, I finally started to open up and talk about…

When admitting to even a brush with mental illness doesn't disqualify someone from running for public office, my point with be moot. Until then, people who suffer from serious depression have to be very careful who they share this information with.

Re: A terrible tragedy: Dan Haubert of Ticketstumbler (fallentimes) has passed away

#106

Post by ryanspahn »

brandnewlow wrote: post #104
ryanspahn wrote: post #101

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What? "You keep it hidden because for every 1 person who takes your advice and helps you out there are 5 who will write you off as a serious person for the rest of your life. Edit: I'm not saying this is right/wrong, but there are real consequences to outing oneself as a depressive." What are the consequences? After dealing with OCD and social anxiety issues from 18 to 28, I finally started to open up and talk about…

When admitting to even a brush with mental illness doesn't disqualify someone from running for public office, my point with be moot. Until then, people who suffer from serious depression have to be very careful who they share this information with.

Feel free to elaborate the whom you are speaking of. I guess I could start a list... 1. Navy seals 2. High level CIA/FBI agents 3. Airline pilots; any person whose work deals with the lives of others.

Maybe that is a good sampling of whom you speak of?

Re: A terrible tragedy: Dan Haubert of Ticketstumbler (fallentimes) has passed away

#107

Post by jeffesp »

brandnewlow wrote: post #30
bprater wrote: post #26

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Depression is an incredibly insidious disease folks, especially because sufferers normally keep it hidden from others. Some days you can feel completely fine, have amazing connections with people, love your work, be a completely present and loving parent and spouse. And on really bad days, it feels like the sky has completely collapsed on you and that the only logical thing to do is make the world a better place by l…

You keep it hidden because for every 1 person who takes your advice and helps you out there are 5 who will write you off as a serious person for the rest of your life. Edit: I'm not saying this is right/wrong, but there are real consequences to outing oneself as a depressive.

There are people (who keep this stuff confidential) to talk to though. You have to pay them and it can be difficult to find one that just doesn't want to blame the past instead of helping you move forward. But these people do exist and are helpful. I suggest finding someone who knows something about cognitive behavioral therapy.

I agree with a sibling comment here that it is vital to talk through these things. If you can't trust your friends, first find someone else to talk to and then find some new friends.

Re: A terrible tragedy: Dan Haubert of Ticketstumbler (fallentimes) has passed away

#108

Post by bootload »

"... A Terrible Tragedy ..."

I'm pretty p$ssed off with this. Why?

I didn't know Dan but I do remember his ideas. I also remember a picture from ticketstumbler. It took a while to equate "Dan" with "fallentimes".

Firstly it's the sheer bloody waste. The waste of youth, the talent and opportunity. Then there is the betrayal. Betrayal in the sense of abandoning of those who cared, family, friends. It took a bit of time for me to accept "tragedy" as the correct phrase to use here? Tragedy for me is/was reserved for people killed, because they had no other opportunity, no other choice. I've had plenty of time to reflect on "tragedy" this year. I've been to more funeral services this year than I care for and I'll be working on the fallout for years to come ~ http://www.flickr.com/photos/bootload/collections/7215762118... So I can empathise with the situation. I really can.

But I now realise the passing of Dan is just as tragic in the true Greek sense for other reasons. It's a tragedy because of all the choices Dan made he chose the one that will do the most damage to himself, his family and friends. It's a tragedy because of the waste of youth, talent and opportunity. Dan's gift to me is he re-enforces the idea of "be good", "try your best", "have fun" but gain some perspective of what really matters. I know this is hard in Startups and in youth. Perspective comes with time.

Remember this when you fail, when you succeed. Don't let the trivial get on top of you, lest you let others down, more than yourself.

Re: A terrible tragedy: Dan Haubert of Ticketstumbler (fallentimes) has passed away

#109

Post by tdavis »

tptacek wrote: post #84

Tom, Dan seems like just an impossibly awesome guy. http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=392341 http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=338357 I'm so sorry for the loss. Dan, I hope it was an adventure. Peace be with you.

He most certainly was; thank you! He was always the one person who couldn't be phased. I still don't know how it came to this.

Re: A terrible tragedy: Dan Haubert of Ticketstumbler (fallentimes) has passed away

#110

Post by [deleted] »

brandnewlow wrote: post #30
bprater wrote: post #26

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Depression is an incredibly insidious disease folks, especially because sufferers normally keep it hidden from others. Some days you can feel completely fine, have amazing connections with people, love your work, be a completely present and loving parent and spouse. And on really bad days, it feels like the sky has completely collapsed on you and that the only logical thing to do is make the world a better place by l…

You keep it hidden because for every 1 person who takes your advice and helps you out there are 5 who will write you off as a serious person for the rest of your life. Edit: I'm not saying this is right/wrong, but there are real consequences to outing oneself as a depressive.

[deleted]
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