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How to intentionally get denied entry into the United States?

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Re: How to intentionally get denied entry into the United States?

#121

Post by MichaelGG »

If she's coming over to live, then she should be denied entry anyways. Perhaps just stay straight-out "I'm moving here." Maybe throw in something about maybe getting a job "To have more money for our family." Neither of those are total lies, but any CBP agent that's not asleep should block entry. She might even just tell them the situation, ask to see a supervisor and go from there. They may be able to provide something better on her record that way.

Although it can really depend on who she gets. My wife came over to see me after I moved to the US after just losing our daughter. She had a 10-year multi-entry visa, had come and gone several times before. They held her for a couple of hours, went through all her stuff (which is to be expected), but then demanded to know why she was sad about losing a child, why she had written about her child if she had died, and on and on. My wife decided she'll never fly through the US again.

Once I got an agent, first thing out of his mouth was "you're going to miss your flight". When I said he didn't know when it was (I had a 3 hour layover), he said it didn't matter, he'd make sure. Other times, they barely even glance up and wave me through.

Re: How to intentionally get denied entry into the United States?

#122

Post by smoe »

aestra wrote: post #80
smoe wrote: post #52

Earlier quoted context omitted.

One of the "just say no" sayer here. I do understand, that the author is from Pakistan and currently studying in Spain. But, even though I think family is important, sometimes you have to value your own will over that of the family, no matter the cost. My father lost almost all of his friends, decades of relations, and didn't had contact with his family for years, because he decided to leave the "sect" and marry a wo…

Christian Switzerland doesn't have a history of honor killings.

The fear of getting killed, as she commented, was about what happens if she gets her family in trouble, not if she just said no. See my earlier answer to LaGrange.

Re: How to intentionally get denied entry into the United States?

#123

Post by logfromblammo »

sergiotapia wrote: post #28

Wow what trash suggestions that woman is getting. "Just report him." What the fuck SE community? Just ruin the lives of more than one family living in the states just because this girl is too chicken to just say no - from thousands of miles away no less.

Families who hold cultural values that are antipodal to our own, which tend to abhor slavery in all of its forms. If their lives are ruined, it is because they are flagrantly disobeying laws on immigration and human trafficking.

By the same argument, imprisoning the criminal mastermind of an organized crime family is also ruining the lives of more than one family. That doesn't mean we shouldn't do it. In the US, and in Europe, forced marriages, involuntary servitude, and other curtailments of free will and self determination are considered immoral, and in most places are also illegal. If the families wished to continue living by exclusively Pakistani cultural values, perhaps they shouldn't be trying to control women like chattel property in Spain and the US.

WTF sergiotapia?

They can avoid having their lives ruined merely by not acting like misogynist thugs amidst teeming hordes of people that believe in gender equality.

Re: How to intentionally get denied entry into the United States?

#124

Post by ef4 »

I know better than to try to give advice when I can't relate at all to her situation.

But I would just like to take this opportunity to say "fuck you" to her relatives in the United States. Economic opportunity and personal liberty are a package deal, you want one without the other and you're playing with fire.

You're guaranteed to lose, either quickly or slowly. Quickly if this young woman continues down the path she's clearly already on and calls down the weight of the state on your heads. Slowly if you win this round, only to see your grandchildren grow up fully-Americanized.

Re: How to intentionally get denied entry into the United States?

#125

Post by MichaelGG »

Hansi wrote: post #10

I fear this will get a lot of "Just say no" comments from people that don't understand that the author is from Pakistan and most likely grew up in a completely different culture than most of us are used to. And it seems like she's not villing/able to cut of contact with her family as I would maybe do if I were in her place, but I'll never be so it's hard to even imagine what I'd do.

Yeah, she even said that she has family working at JFK that can check up on things and report if she doesn't show.

I get it, on technical things, you can be 100% correct in telling someone "no, what you're attempting is just wrong, and this approach works better". On issues of life, with adults, it might be nice to remind people of other options. It's just silly though to insist that the person hasn't thought of their position and didn't come up with the idea of "oh I should just call the cops".

It's like someone says "how can I hide that I'm a heroin addict at work; I can't lose my job right now" and the reply is just "stop using drugs". Wow, that's helpful.

Re: How to intentionally get denied entry into the United States?

#126

Post by JabavuAdams »

aestra wrote: post #80
smoe wrote: post #52

Earlier quoted context omitted.

One of the "just say no" sayer here. I do understand, that the author is from Pakistan and currently studying in Spain. But, even though I think family is important, sometimes you have to value your own will over that of the family, no matter the cost. My father lost almost all of his friends, decades of relations, and didn't had contact with his family for years, because he decided to leave the "sect" and marry a wo…

Christian Switzerland doesn't have a history of honor killings.

Well, not a recent one.

Basically, Western society got this crap out of the way a few hundred years ago. We still have "slut shaming" and other milder vestiges.

Re: How to intentionally get denied entry into the United States?

#127

Post by johnjay »

dasil003 wrote: post #70
songshu wrote: post #51

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Pakistan is not a Middle Eastern country

Yeah and my dad (Brazilian) is fond of saying that Brazil is not a Latin American country because of language and cultural divide between Spanish vs Portuguese colonies. Fine, both of those are valid beliefs. But you shouldn't feel the need to inject them as a tangent in random conversations to educate people. You will never ever win this battle.

Yeah, we from Latin America don't really consider Brazilians latin because of the different language. Although I guess technically they are.

Re: How to intentionally get denied entry into the United States?

#130

Post by LaGrange »

smoe wrote: post #112
LaGrange wrote: post #79

Earlier quoted context omitted.

See the "I don't want my family to get in trouble, they're gonna kill me if they find out that I did something at the airport.” comment later? Think it’s a hyperbole? Well, it’s not.

The original question mentioned, that she didn't want to live with her stupid in-laws and husband, as well as vague family issues. I don't jump to conclusions, that just because she is Pakistani and has a family that likes to push her around, that they're bloodthirstily maniacs. The comment about getting herself killed, was about what happens, if she gets her family in trouble, not if she just left them. As I underst…

You should read more than a headline. She explicitly says that her mother and sister live in Pakistan. I'm being a bit harsh here, but in this case being quick to comment on the issue without reading through the entire thread can actually be damaging. Also, "trouble" also means dishonor in this case.

Even her language in the original post was pretty clear (though only if you've ever read about such cases before, I admit, so I don't blame you for not reading it that way - 10 years ago I probably wouldn't notice either) - the vagueness there is actually a defensive strategy, and possibly one more terrifying consequence of such cases. This really is a slow-release horror case.

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