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Bullying has to stop, now.

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Re: Bullying has to stop, now.

#41

Post by ErrantX »

brador wrote: post #39
manicdee wrote: post #32

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Not punish the kid defending himself with a chair? Not punish the kid hitting back at someone who was bullying him? Not punish the kid who beat up the bully? It actually helps to have some idea of what's going on in the school yard, ask witnesses what was going on, and IF KIDS COMPLAIN ABOUT BULLYING DON'T TELL THEM TO GET OVER IT. "You're not making an effort to fit in" is blaming the victim. I'm not making the fuck…

Evidence. Bullies are very careful to cover their tracks, they know the limits of the system, verbal bullying is usually ignored as is physical intimidation. And then it's one kids word against the others + one kid holding a chair. With the above, a reasonable adult, considering evidence, has no choice but to "arrest" the kid with the chair, since the other has done no wrong other than verbal + possible pushing. The…

The system needs fixing by making what the bully did prior to the event actionable by the adults so it wouldn't escalate to where it did. Cameras would help.

At a school, the adults are the system, so I think my point still stands.

I've long wondered what would have fixed this... in the end the only solution I could come up with would be to segregate the consummate bullies. I'm sure smarter people could think of more adroit solutions.

Re: Bullying has to stop, now.

#42

Post by jbrooksuk »

ErrantX wrote: post #15

I don't think anything has touched me this deeply for years. I even got a little teary (which is rare for me). A lot of this I can relate to. School was hell for me, and I still struggle to forgive the adults around me during that period who, despite knowing what I (and others) faced, failed us utterly. Of course, school is rough and tumble - but when things went too far they sympathised, and in some rare cases talke…

> Kids will be kids, eh?

Alongside the "sticks and stones rhyme" this sentence makes me tear my hair our every time I hear it. Kids who bully are thugs, not kids. My brother, he's 13, he's a kid, not a thug. He skateboards and hurts himself, plays computer games and does his homework. That is a kid.

I feel or you too buddy. That whole sentence gets me really irate.

Re: Bullying has to stop, now.

#43

Post by InclinedPlane »

We live in a country that is heavily optimized toward factory work. Designed to produce a citizenry which is made up primarily of compliant, obedient assembly line workers in an era where the dubious advantages that once had are no longer relevant. Our labor laws, our political systems, and especially our public educational system (which is heavily based on the Prussian model) have been built along these models. The impedance mismatch is becoming greater and greater over time, we would be wise to understand the root of the problem and work to fix it.

Re: Bullying has to stop, now.

#45

Post by colomon »

petercooper wrote: post #36

Going off on a tangent here, but do people who are good at sports often suffer long term bullying at school? I wasn't bullied at school, IMHO (nothing physical, the odd bit of name calling.. which they got back ;-)) but it seemed as if people who were into sports avoided every hassle, including the sportier geeks who were in the football team, etc. Looking back, I have to wonder if there's something about being activ…

Two thoughts:

I can recall the lightest wrestler on my high school wrestling team getting bullied by his teammates several times. I didn't do anything to help him.

I was one of those sporty geeks in high school, but I was completely unsporty in elementary school, and I was never significantly bullied. I suspect my "defense" was mostly being the biggest kid in the class.

Re: Bullying has to stop, now.

#46

Post by rytis »

jbrooksuk wrote: post #18
y2bd wrote: post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> my teacher turned around, saw what happened and turned away. I want to hope that we'll reach some point where this won't happen anymore.

Likewise. I remember being backed against a wall, lads a lot bigger around me. I was lifted up the wall punched in the stomach, looked up and saw the teacher almost with fear in her face, too scared to stand up for a student. Not all of my teachers were like that thankfully, but that is the root of the problem. Teachers are too scared to deal with incidents like mine.

Can they? At least in the UK you get the stupid "child rights/abuse" nonsense as soon as they try any sort of disciplinary action... Ant the bullies well aware of this situation.

Re: Bullying has to stop, now.

#47

Post by marvin »

arethuza wrote: post #30
Cthulhu_ wrote: post #23

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> What does this teach kids? That there is no justice in the world except that which you take by violence? It teaches me, at least, that bullies get away with what they do because they don't get reprimanded enough. Physical pain is still the best thing to associate with negative or undesirable behavior. I see a distinct trend when it comes to bullying: 1. Kid gets bullied 2. Kid snaps, stands up for himself, beats up…

Aren't all justice systems ultimately based on the threat of violence from the state?

Yes - one of the central tenets of the rule of law is that the state has monopoly on violence, which is enforced by the police and the courts.

Re: Bullying has to stop, now.

#48

Post by moron4hire »

barry-cotter wrote: post #33
ErrantX wrote: post #15

I don't think anything has touched me this deeply for years. I even got a little teary (which is rare for me). A lot of this I can relate to. School was hell for me, and I still struggle to forgive the adults around me during that period who, despite knowing what I (and others) faced, failed us utterly. Of course, school is rough and tumble - but when things went too far they sympathised, and in some rare cases talke…

But what can we do? Kids will be kids, eh? End age based classes would be a good start.

And mandatory attendance. You can't force someone to learn when they don't want to. Stop treating schools like prisons and the attendees will stop acting like inmates.

Re: Bullying has to stop, now.

#49

Post by CaptainDecisive »

Gotttzsche wrote: post #29

uh, all im seeing is a quote about some piece and it fades out until i move the mouse again...??

Yeah, same for me with Chrome. Irritating, isn't it. The site seems poorly designed. I can see a Flashblock icon in the top left so I know what's broken, but I can't click on the Flashblock icon to enable the content, as it won't take focus. Despite being interested in the topic I didn't dig deeper, so they lose a reader.

Re: Bullying has to stop, now.

#50

Post by duopixel »

I'd like to read an honest account from a former bully who matured into a fully functional adult. To this day I don't understand the motivation of terrorizing other kids. I've met some former bullies but it seems that they either don't remember or don't want to deal with understanding it themselves.
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