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Bullying has to stop, now.

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Re: Bullying has to stop, now.

#11

Post by jbrooksuk »

MattBearman wrote: post #8
jbrooksuk wrote: post #5

I can relate to this website and cause. I was bullied throughout my entire high school life, in the UK that's a total of 5 years. I hated every single second of it and my academic skills reflect this. I wasn't a troubled kid, I wasn't someone who looked to cause trouble and I wasn't in trouble except a couple of occasions. I found myself being physically beaten almost every day for being the runt of the kids. I didn'…

It's odd, people always say things like "violence doesn't solve anything" but I've heard so many stories like yours where the bullying only stops when the victim retaliates with force. While I've personally never been on either end of bullying, what I've heard leads me to believe that for extreme physical bullying, getting violent can be the solution.

You've it the nail right on the head there. Unfortunately "forced" violence seems to solve many situations.

I wouldn't fight for the sake of fighting. When I used to go clubbing there were a couple of instances where some drunken guys would kick off on me, I attempt not to fight every time, it's hard to talk a drunken mess out of a fight, but if an attack is thrown at me I'll fight back, solely to knock them down in defense and walk off.

I forgot to mention I started following Ju-Jitsu so that if I was thrown somewhere I could land safely. I now use it to defend myself or friends if we find ourselves in a situation like that. It's happened only a couple of times thankfully.

Re: Bullying has to stop, now.

#12

Post by clicks »

michaelgrafl wrote: post #7

Very impressive piece of work. But what the hell with the UI of this website? It can't find a link to the respective Youtube site, nor can I click the annotations. It looks really nice, but it's not very usable like that.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=... if you would like a direct link (to watch it in 1080p, the animation is so superb you might as well :)).

I was thinking maybe it was a little too melodramatic... but perhaps that helps to facilitate a cathartic release. At any rate -- it's certainly a well-produced piece and worth a watch.

Re: Bullying has to stop, now.

#13

Post by lucian1900 »

MattBearman wrote: post #8
jbrooksuk wrote: post #5

I can relate to this website and cause. I was bullied throughout my entire high school life, in the UK that's a total of 5 years. I hated every single second of it and my academic skills reflect this. I wasn't a troubled kid, I wasn't someone who looked to cause trouble and I wasn't in trouble except a couple of occasions. I found myself being physically beaten almost every day for being the runt of the kids. I didn'…

It's odd, people always say things like "violence doesn't solve anything" but I've heard so many stories like yours where the bullying only stops when the victim retaliates with force. While I've personally never been on either end of bullying, what I've heard leads me to believe that for extreme physical bullying, getting violent can be the solution.

Carefully applied violence is often useful and even socially accepted. It's both sad and interesting.

Re: Bullying has to stop, now.

#14

Post by sw007 »

michaelgrafl wrote: post #7

Very impressive piece of work. But what the hell with the UI of this website? It can't find a link to the respective Youtube site, nor can I click the annotations. It looks really nice, but it's not very usable like that.

Yes sorry about this. The site - GetInspired365 has two parts to it. One part which is a daily dose of inspiration, and another which is where users can submit inspiring things they've found - a user has posted this video on to the site and not included the source and as such may be a bit frustrating. The original source is here - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ltun92DfnPY

Re: Bullying has to stop, now.

#15

Post by ErrantX »

I don't think anything has touched me this deeply for years. I even got a little teary (which is rare for me).

A lot of this I can relate to. School was hell for me, and I still struggle to forgive the adults around me during that period who, despite knowing what I (and others) faced, failed us utterly. Of course, school is rough and tumble - but when things went too far they sympathised, and in some rare cases talked to the bullies parents. I don't ever remember anyone being excluded or punished properly, though.

One thing I am never, ever, going to tell my kids is the stupid "sticks and stones" rhyme. That's just to make you feel better, not them. I'd get depressed, or upset, and get hugs and sympathy, but no solutions.

The first guy he describes in this video I can relate to. I became withdrawn, anti-social, believing that solace was in books and learning rather than other people. Fortunately I ran into some people at university who slowly dragged me out of myself. And, eventually, I met a girl who tore apart my world and helped me rebuild it (although, maybe she didn't realise at the time, I'd got so good at hiding everything away).

One particular idiot at school loved to taunt me, hold my upside down by my ankles. One day I snapped, and as he ran at me I picked up a chair and swung it. So. Much. Trouble. I was very nearly expelled... The same guy was a consummate bully, big, loud and evil to anyone weaker than him. There was another kid in our class, a bit large but it was more muscle than fat. He was lovely, quiet and very very odd (I think he came from a bad family). One day the bully was shaking down some younger kids in the playground and, I remember this vividly, this guy just decided enough was enough. He calmly walked across the playground and threw bully against the wall. Pounded him in the face a few times and told him to stop. It worked, so so well (he was excluded of course, but there you go...), and we rarely suffered again.

What does this teach kids? That there is no justice in the world except that which you take by violence?

I am certain that school ripped up several years of my life, and still adversely affects me to this day. But what can we do? Kids will be kids, eh?

Re: Bullying has to stop, now.

#16

Post by y2bd »

jbrooksuk wrote: post #5

I can relate to this website and cause. I was bullied throughout my entire high school life, in the UK that's a total of 5 years. I hated every single second of it and my academic skills reflect this. I wasn't a troubled kid, I wasn't someone who looked to cause trouble and I wasn't in trouble except a couple of occasions. I found myself being physically beaten almost every day for being the runt of the kids. I didn'…

> my teacher turned around, saw what happened and turned away.

I want to hope that we'll reach some point where this won't happen anymore.

Re: Bullying has to stop, now.

#18

Post by jbrooksuk »

y2bd wrote: post #16
jbrooksuk wrote: post #5

I can relate to this website and cause. I was bullied throughout my entire high school life, in the UK that's a total of 5 years. I hated every single second of it and my academic skills reflect this. I wasn't a troubled kid, I wasn't someone who looked to cause trouble and I wasn't in trouble except a couple of occasions. I found myself being physically beaten almost every day for being the runt of the kids. I didn'…

> my teacher turned around, saw what happened and turned away. I want to hope that we'll reach some point where this won't happen anymore.

Likewise. I remember being backed against a wall, lads a lot bigger around me. I was lifted up the wall punched in the stomach, looked up and saw the teacher almost with fear in her face, too scared to stand up for a student.

Not all of my teachers were like that thankfully, but that is the root of the problem. Teachers are too scared to deal with incidents like mine.

Re: Bullying has to stop, now.

#20

Post by Nursie »

MattBearman wrote: post #8
jbrooksuk wrote: post #5

I can relate to this website and cause. I was bullied throughout my entire high school life, in the UK that's a total of 5 years. I hated every single second of it and my academic skills reflect this. I wasn't a troubled kid, I wasn't someone who looked to cause trouble and I wasn't in trouble except a couple of occasions. I found myself being physically beaten almost every day for being the runt of the kids. I didn'…

It's odd, people always say things like "violence doesn't solve anything" but I've heard so many stories like yours where the bullying only stops when the victim retaliates with force. While I've personally never been on either end of bullying, what I've heard leads me to believe that for extreme physical bullying, getting violent can be the solution.

At age 9 people used to take my stuff and occasionally bully me in a sort of low-grade way. Until I beat the tar out of the main offender. You get a reputation as the smart/nerdy guy that once smashed the jock's head into a wall and nobody really bothers you again.

Bullying should absolutely be stopped by other means, but when it comes down to it these are animal level dominance games amongst young apes and violence does often solve them. I'm not saying it should, but it does.

If/when I have kids they'll be told to defend themselves and that their parents will back them up even if the school doesn't.

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