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The Real Luxuries In Life

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Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#191

Post by glouwbug »

zkmon wrote: post #64

Time, quiet mind, slow mornings, rest without guilt, calm and boring days - are all the same thing - escape from being busy. This assumes being busy is common, which is actually not that common for an age of 60+. The real luxury, for any age, in general, is in not having dependencies and needs. The need to impress someone, the need to know every ugly news from around globe, the need to read everything and be knowledg…

You can decide not to do any of these things. In fact, not wanting _anything_ is 100% within your control. It's literally what the stoics built the entirety of their philosophy on: aversion to pain and pleasure and redirection to moral choice

Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#192

Post by pzo »

ElProlactin wrote: post #128
zkmon wrote: post #107

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Being loved is not a weakness. But a strong requirement to be loved is a weakness because that means you don't have strength to be happy without being loved.

This is actually a sad comment. How did you ever come to believe that wanting to feel loved, which is a fundamental desire (if not "need") for the vast majority of human beings, could ever be construed as a weakness resulting from a lack of "strength"?

How then about monks or priests? I wouldn't clasify them as all of them being sad or having a fundamental need to be loved. Also loved can have different meaning - mostly people think about family and partners. There is also community.

Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#193

Post by coldtea »

zkmon wrote: post #64

Time, quiet mind, slow mornings, rest without guilt, calm and boring days - are all the same thing - escape from being busy. This assumes being busy is common, which is actually not that common for an age of 60+. The real luxury, for any age, in general, is in not having dependencies and needs. The need to impress someone, the need to know every ugly news from around globe, the need to read everything and be knowledg…

>Time, quiet mind, slow mornings, rest without guilt, calm and boring days - are all the same thing - escape from being busy. This assumes being busy is common, which is actually not that common for an age of 60+.

If there's anything 60+ are starting to not have enough of is time. As you get older time is running out. Not free time - time in general, as in life expectancy.

Regular free time can be elusive too if you're still forced to work, which can be the case until your mid to late 60s, a common pension age globally or if your savings have been wiped out.

"Slow mornings, rest without guilt, calm and boring days" too are not just "escape from being busy", but also being away from all kinds of bad situations: war, social turmoil, family drama, spouse dying, and others, that are not just about not being busy with work. Being 60+ might help with being busy (if you're retiring), but not with those.

>The real luxury, for any age, in general, is in not having dependencies and needs. The need to impress someone, the need to know every ugly news from around globe, the need to read everything and be knowledgeable, need to stay connected, need to be smart, the need to travel and see places, need to taste foods from around the world, need to have many friends, need to be loved by someone, and need to have more money and things.

That's sort of true, but too much of that can also mean one is just a jaded, burnt out person who doesn't care about anything and has no joy anymore.

Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#194

Post by retired »

flexagoon wrote: post #188
retired wrote: post #178

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Haven't used public transport in a long time. I used it to commute in the past but stopped using it during COVID. Can't say I miss it. Prefer to just leave when I want, go where I want and stay there as long as I want. All while not enjoying other peoples music and smell or waiting at a platform for ages.

> Prefer to just leave when I want, go where I want and stay there as long as I want. Which you can do with a good public transport system! You should not have to wait for a subway train for more than 5 minutes. Ideally no more than 1-2.

A subway is only for local trips. And only a very small part of the world has subways. I have never lived in a place with a subway. I did briefly live in Amsterdam but the subway wasn't very useful there.

With private transport I can go anywhere on the continent whenever I want.

Edit: reply to flexagoon since I am rate limited:

Going around Europe on trains is a total pain. There is a reason almost nobody does that and use airplanes instead.

Perhaps they can make the comfort of trains comparable with airplanes, so more people use it.

I'm OK with allocating tax money for better public transport but I just don't see myself using it.

Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#195

Post by flyinglizard »

zkmon wrote: post #99
polpenn wrote: post #88

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I agree with some of what you listed here but a few I think are critical to being human. What's the point of not having needs? Desires are what makes us human. I have kids and family and friends that love me and them in return but I don't believe that makes me weak. In fact it is the opposite, they give me the strength, confidence, and motivation to power through life. I supoose not having any needs and desires would…

Desires are OK as long as they don't make you unhappy when you can't have them. But that's not usually the case, which means they became crutches, making your happiness to depend on achieving them. As an example, there are places where people don't see electricity as an absolute necessity. Hours of outages everyday go mostly unnoticed. That's lack of strong dependency.

We need purpose, as a species; after all we left the caves for a better life. Desires make us human, the pursuit keep us busy and entertained. There is no passion without wanting, and without passion what is the reason for living?

Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#196

Post by tonymet »

I would replace freedom to travel with contentment / joy at home. I love my home , neighborhood and town. I used to die to travel because home had so much chaos. Now my home is beautiful , peaceful and safe so I get homesick when I travel.

Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#197

Post by pzo »

teaearlgraycold wrote: post #176
ericmcer wrote: post #173

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That is a nice list for someone in their 20s with no responsibilities. Once you get a partner, kids, elderly parents, pets, mortgage, etc. you won't be worrying about your needs anymore trust me.

As someone in my 30s I'm not sure I need the things on your list. Can't escape the aging of my parents but I'm lucky they will be able to financially support themselves through retirement. If I do add complications to my life I'll be careful to do my best ensuring it's a net benefit to my stability and peace.

yeah some people are very orthodox and think having a partner, kids, pets, mortgage is a must. The easiest exceptions is being a monk or priest and they are fine and society accept it.

Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#198

Post by glouwbug »

ericmcer wrote: post #173
zkmon wrote: post #64

Time, quiet mind, slow mornings, rest without guilt, calm and boring days - are all the same thing - escape from being busy. This assumes being busy is common, which is actually not that common for an age of 60+. The real luxury, for any age, in general, is in not having dependencies and needs. The need to impress someone, the need to know every ugly news from around globe, the need to read everything and be knowledg…

That is a nice list for someone in their 20s with no responsibilities. Once you get a partner, kids, elderly parents, pets, mortgage, etc. you won't be worrying about your needs anymore trust me.

Age has nothing to do with it. Those were your life style choices and they now impact you for the rest of your life. You could well have done the opposite and thrown all your earnings into the SP500, rented for cheap near your parents, traveled the world, and have no partner and/or multiple partners

Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#199

Post by coldtea »

mmaunder wrote: post #22

Health determines the quality and quantity of time, so put that at the top above all else.

Usually yes. But people will also sacrifice their health for their loved ones, for example by working hard unhealthy jobs, or for a mission that's larger-than-themselves.

Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#200

Post by flexagoon »

retired wrote: post #194
flexagoon wrote: post #188

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Prefer to just leave when I want, go where I want and stay there as long as I want. Which you can do with a good public transport system! You should not have to wait for a subway train for more than 5 minutes. Ideally no more than 1-2.

A subway is only for local trips. And only a very small part of the world has subways. I have never lived in a place with a subway. I did briefly live in Amsterdam but the subway wasn't very useful there. With private transport I can go anywhere on the continent whenever I want. Edit: reply to flexagoon since I am rate limited: Going around Europe on trains is a total pain. There is a reason almost nobody does that a…

Of course, I don't think anyone in this thread is advocating for banning private transport and only keeping public transit for everything. But most of the trips people take are local, and a good public transport system makes that much better for everyone (including the car drivers).

You can also go around the continent on trains. We should have more high speed rail.

Private transport is of course still hugely useful for many cases, but there are also many cases where it could easily be replaced for many people by a good transit system. And I'm not just talking about the US, which people usually give as an example of bad transit. EU's railway network should be much better.

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