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The Real Luxuries In Life

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Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#121

Post by nuancebydefault »

eastbound wrote: post #85
nuancebydefault wrote: post #66

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I would put love above health. Suppose you are perfectly healthy and even rich but have no friends to share anything with, life must be meaningless then.

[flagged]

I'm sorry to read that. In fact I meant love in a more broad sense. There are many kinds of love, it does not need to be having a spouse. I work every weekday mainly for having good relations with people, money comes second.

But coming back to your story of life (ignoring the last sentence) : it's not too late to find love and also: try knowing and loving yourself, being content a bit more. When that succeeds, it is more easy to find love.

Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#122

Post by satyrnein »

cejast wrote: post #104
zkmon wrote: post #64

Time, quiet mind, slow mornings, rest without guilt, calm and boring days - are all the same thing - escape from being busy. This assumes being busy is common, which is actually not that common for an age of 60+. The real luxury, for any age, in general, is in not having dependencies and needs. The need to impress someone, the need to know every ugly news from around globe, the need to read everything and be knowledg…

I have to regularly travel to rural villages in Asia and the people that live in these places have only the most basic human desires. They barely know what an LLM is let alone interact with them. They're some of the happiest people I've ever met. Of course they'll complain about work or money, and they assume that a Western salary buys me freedom. But they get to live through these luxuries on a daily basis. I'd be l…

Not to be glib, but I assume you're not quitting your Western job and moving there. So isn't this romanticizing it?

Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#123

Post by thomasahle »

nutjob2 wrote: post #68
Multiplayer wrote: post #5

Time with my young adult children. They are all out of the house, recently, and there is nothing, and I mean NOTHING more valuable/meaningful to us than when they come home for a visit or we spend time out in the world. It's incredible.

I never enjoyed spending time with my late parents. I only did so out of a sense of obligation. I have no children and have never really given that choice a second thought. Its interesting that people value their relationship with their children so much and I assume its due to a deep sense of connection with them, they being "flesh and blood" but I've never given that any weight. I feel much more connected to people…

Do you want people here to try to convince you to have kids?

Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#125

Post by brazukadev »

eastbound wrote: post #85
nuancebydefault wrote: post #66

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I would put love above health. Suppose you are perfectly healthy and even rich but have no friends to share anything with, life must be meaningless then.

[flagged]

The first half of your message led me to write a well meaning reply to tell you you still have time to be happy and meet that girl from high school or someone else. The second part is so dark and evil that I regret wasting my time.

Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#126

Post by bluGill »

zkmon wrote: post #107
mathgeek wrote: post #96

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> The real luxury, for any age, in general, is in not having dependencies and needs. Fewer. Everyone will always have some dependencies and needs. Personally, I pity anyone who sees a desire to be loved as a weakness. That’s quite literally a lesson taught as a trope about being a good person vs an evil one.

Being loved is not a weakness. But a strong requirement to be loved is a weakness because that means you don't have strength to be happy without being loved.

Love is extremely common. It is not particularly much of a weakness because there are plenty of people who will love you. Now, finding that person, or those people, depending on exactly what it means, that could be hard. There are also a lot of people who will abuse your need for love, and so you do have to be careful.

Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#127

Post by j45 »

zkmon wrote: post #64

Time, quiet mind, slow mornings, rest without guilt, calm and boring days - are all the same thing - escape from being busy. This assumes being busy is common, which is actually not that common for an age of 60+. The real luxury, for any age, in general, is in not having dependencies and needs. The need to impress someone, the need to know every ugly news from around globe, the need to read everything and be knowledg…

Nicely said.

Having dependencies or needs is one thing, having them managed for relative minimal impact on one's time might be another way to look at it for some.

Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#128

Post by ElProlactin »

zkmon wrote: post #107
mathgeek wrote: post #96

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> The real luxury, for any age, in general, is in not having dependencies and needs. Fewer. Everyone will always have some dependencies and needs. Personally, I pity anyone who sees a desire to be loved as a weakness. That’s quite literally a lesson taught as a trope about being a good person vs an evil one.

Being loved is not a weakness. But a strong requirement to be loved is a weakness because that means you don't have strength to be happy without being loved.

This is actually a sad comment. How did you ever come to believe that wanting to feel loved, which is a fundamental desire (if not "need") for the vast majority of human beings, could ever be construed as a weakness resulting from a lack of "strength"?

Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#129

Post by j45 »

cejast wrote: post #104
zkmon wrote: post #64

Time, quiet mind, slow mornings, rest without guilt, calm and boring days - are all the same thing - escape from being busy. This assumes being busy is common, which is actually not that common for an age of 60+. The real luxury, for any age, in general, is in not having dependencies and needs. The need to impress someone, the need to know every ugly news from around globe, the need to read everything and be knowledg…

I have to regularly travel to rural villages in Asia and the people that live in these places have only the most basic human desires. They barely know what an LLM is let alone interact with them. They're some of the happiest people I've ever met. Of course they'll complain about work or money, and they assume that a Western salary buys me freedom. But they get to live through these luxuries on a daily basis. I'd be l…

Desires only tend to magnify in intensity and multiply in numbers because there is rarely enough.

Working on desire is a big thing.

Re: The Real Luxuries In Life

#130

Post by malux85 »

Jeaye wrote: post #59
malux85 wrote: post #12

40. The luxuries I am grateful for: Sleeping in as much as I need Working on something meaningful that pushes at the edge of my self actualization Not ever having to worry about bills The love from my partner Having the ability to help others selflessly The wisdom I have gained over the last 20 years of life The incredible people around me

Would you mind sharing an example of "Working on something meaningful that pushes at the edge of my self actualization"? In my experience, work, even when meaningful, is quite separate from self actualization. I'm interested to hear how you're combining them.

> In my experience, work, even when meaningful, is quite separate from self actualization.

I guess it depends on your temperament - I am very very high in industriousness and moderately high in curiosity, but the industriousness overrides the fragmentation of attention that normally comes with high curiosity individuals.

2 years ago my hobby project turned into a company, and now I run that, so for me I can find self actualisation through work, but I imagine if I was a different temperment, where work didn't overlap so much, it would be harder for that type of person.

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