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Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

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Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#291

Post by JackMorgan »

Telaneo wrote: post #12

Horrors beyond your comprehension are mild compared to the horrors you can understand but cannot fix.

I'm not very smart, but I've read so much history.

I've also got a pretty strong pattern matching engine.

Since the age of 8 my family traveled across the world interacting and working with thousands of folks of all walks of life. I still travel a lot and love to talk to people and ask them their stories. I've worked many different jobs, to this day some of my jobs are minimum wage, some are extremely high earning.

The pattern matching engine has a lot input to match on and it reminds me a few dozen times a day that today my current country is fractionally less safe than it was yesterday. There's nothing I can do to fight against a high tech propaganda media campaign that's morphed into a mass cult that craves genocide.

No amount of prepping or homesteading or storing away gold will help when the food riots come.

CBT and journaling and meditating have helped me come to the realization that while I'll almost certainly die from violence, I will be present and enjoy every second until that happens. I form deep connections with my neighbors and build a big community of people I love. I share joy with all I can, and I comfort those who are sad. The only thing in life that matters are people and how I treat them, so I try to embrace them all and meet them where they are with kindness and love.

A brilliant thru-hiking documentary says it best: "It's The People".

Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#292

Post by xyzelement »

watwut wrote: post #281
xyzelement wrote: post #139

I think being smart universally trumps being less smart - but the definition of smart needs to be more encompassing. For example take the stereotype of a brilliant man or woman who neglected family for career, and are forever single and childless forever -- while someone less brilliant just "ends up" with a family and ultimately more fulfilled in life. Superficially this is an example of an average person being happi…

The issue here is that if the smart brilliant man decides that he will prioritize his family and friends, creating happy community around him ... you will just say he was not brilliant. Because he earns less money. As in, your example assumes that if you are brilliant you will neglect family, if you care about family you are not brilliant. You do indeed need to change the definition of "smart" to not be just "earns a…

I think you missed the point of my post. It's not either or but the totality of persuit and outcome.

Neglecting family for work is not smart. Neglecting work for family is also not smart (hurts the family)

Striking the right balance and achieving enough of each is the smart thing that's hard to pull off but is the prize.

Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#293

Post by xyzelement »

kakacik wrote: post #232
xyzelement wrote: post #139

I think being smart universally trumps being less smart - but the definition of smart needs to be more encompassing. For example take the stereotype of a brilliant man or woman who neglected family for career, and are forever single and childless forever -- while someone less brilliant just "ends up" with a family and ultimately more fulfilled in life. Superficially this is an example of an average person being happi…

You reduce massively this complex topic into having kids = more happiness. Divorce rates, marriage counseling intensity and just looking around paints a very different and much more realistic picture. Most marriages either fail or keep it up in semi-miserable fashion (for kids, money, insecurity and so on but never due to actual strength of the bond or any love remaining). That comes from married father of two - the…

We are having a conversation about smart outcomes here.

The divorce rate is not a random thing. My odds of being happily married or miserable are heavily influenced by how I have worked on myself and who I chose to marry.

So part of being "smart" is navigating that situation to achieve the right outcome. The outcome itself is not guaranteed but to cite the rate without acknowledging the factors that are in your control misses the point here. Someone's terrible marriage is of no relevance to your situation.

Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#294

Post by ericpauley »

boznz wrote: post #66
darth_avocado wrote: post #23

Im not smart (maybe average), but a lot of my unhappiness starts from just having access to information. And then more I process the information, the more unhappy I become. Smarter people than me probably have more information and are able to process it faster, uncovering effects that are not readily perceived by normal folks like myself.

I stopped viewing all news media companies five years ago. Real news will get to you pretty quickly by other means such as HN which I still frequent a couple of hours a week. Modern news is re-hashing even the trivial in the worst possible way and inviting the extreme idiots on both sides to fight it out in the comment section, I can honestly say I am missing nothing and still find myself informed and happier.

"He who reads nothing will still learn the great facts, and the details are all false."

–Thomas Jefferson

Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#295

Post by xyzelement »

sublinear wrote: post #217
xyzelement wrote: post #139

I think being smart universally trumps being less smart - but the definition of smart needs to be more encompassing. For example take the stereotype of a brilliant man or woman who neglected family for career, and are forever single and childless forever -- while someone less brilliant just "ends up" with a family and ultimately more fulfilled in life. Superficially this is an example of an average person being happi…

> they were more able to follow family patterns and advice while the "brilliant" person tries to figure out everything from scratch, not able to benefit from the "well trodden paths" that are available You know, sometimes the well-trodden paths are chains worth breaking man. Most families aren't exactly The Brady Bunch. I think we agree that it takes all kinds of people, but you are mischaracterizing what it means to…

I am genuinely curious as to what you think my comment "sounds like"

But I don't disagree with your first paragraph. Some well troden paths maybe bad - the trick is to know which ones. Because if you make that fall wrong you end up in a bad state which is what I was talking about.

Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#296

Post by wseqyrku »

mandarinclips wrote: post #289

Interesting article. But here's my situation: I'm not smart, and I'm also not happy. So where does that leave me?

You can be angry all the time. I do this and it works out great since I don't have to explain myself anymore, everyone can totally just fuck off.

Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#297

Post by xyzelement »

thin_carapace wrote: post #207
xyzelement wrote: post #139

I think being smart universally trumps being less smart - but the definition of smart needs to be more encompassing. For example take the stereotype of a brilliant man or woman who neglected family for career, and are forever single and childless forever -- while someone less brilliant just "ends up" with a family and ultimately more fulfilled in life. Superficially this is an example of an average person being happi…

not that wage is any indicator of inherent goodness but yea electrical engineers get paid average wage in my country while miners earn many multiples of said wage, who's the dumb one now ???

Presumably miners get a high wage to offset the negatives of the job and attract people. So to an extent you have a choice which way to go and you try to make a smart one.

Personally I wouldn't have a highly hazardous job if it paid any multiple of what I make now and that feels smart to my situation. But for someone else that might be a different calculus.

Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#298

Post by joenot443 »

sublinear wrote: post #214
GMoromisato wrote: post #208

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The thing about having children is that you absolutely cannot know what it's like until you actually have them. And then, of course, it's too late. I'm convinced that I would have been happy without children. I would have lived a wonderful life, maybe with a spouse, maybe alone, traveling the world, working on my interests, and generally doing whatever I wanted to do. You don't miss what you never had. But now that I…

> you absolutely cannot know what it's like until you actually have them While it's less common now, I don't think anyone who grew up in a bigger family under one roof could agree with that. Nothing divine is gatekeeping this experience. It's the socioeconomic climate we've created doing that. It makes perfect sense that you value your family so deeply, but you might want to reconsider where you anchor your pride. It…

I grew up in a large family of 5 kids and I think it’d be very ignorant to suggest that experience is at all comparable to having children of my own.

I promise you that you do not know what having children is like and that the mystery remains alive, should you ever choose to take that journey. One is reminded of Plato’s cave.

Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#299

Post by ifwinterco »

darth_avocado wrote: post #23

Im not smart (maybe average), but a lot of my unhappiness starts from just having access to information. And then more I process the information, the more unhappy I become. Smarter people than me probably have more information and are able to process it faster, uncovering effects that are not readily perceived by normal folks like myself.

Humans simply didn't evolve to be connected to a constant firehose of random information. I firmly believe that even the smartest person will become an idiot if they just scroll X all day

Re: Why aren't smart people happier? (2022)

#300

Post by alexpotato »

There is an excellent blog post from [0] a guy who, due to a circulatory issue, ended up temporarily dropping down in IQ.

In summary, he felt much happier b/c he wasn't constantly seeing broken systems everywhere and feeling frustrated that they needed to be fixed.

Great read and highly recommend.

0 - https://web.archive.org/web/20120508004058/http://garrysub.p...

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