Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Online Friends Are Real Friends

toska.bearblog.dev

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

71–80 of 92 posts

Re: Online Friends Are Real Friends

#71

Post by 0xDEAFBEAD »

AussieWog93 wrote: post #53
0xDEAFBEAD wrote: post #27

For online friendship to really work, we need to solve the problem of pig-butchering scammers (scammers who "make friends with you" and eventually get you to give them money somehow, e.g. by depositing money in a "crypto trading platform", sending money for a "health crisis", etc.) This problem will only get worse with conversational AI agents/deepfakes/etc. For every human seeking genuine friendship there might be 1…

Same thing happens IRL too. Not just literal scams but all kinds of ways people take advantage of one another. Still doesn't change the arithmetic.

Something like half of Cambodia's GDP comes from scams. The internet is key to enabling this.

Re: Online Friends Are Real Friends

#72

Post by 0xDEAFBEAD »

paul7986 wrote: post #30
0xDEAFBEAD wrote: post #27

For online friendship to really work, we need to solve the problem of pig-butchering scammers (scammers who "make friends with you" and eventually get you to give them money somehow, e.g. by depositing money in a "crypto trading platform", sending money for a "health crisis", etc.) This problem will only get worse with conversational AI agents/deepfakes/etc. For every human seeking genuine friendship there might be 1…

Use apps like Snapchat to ensure they are who they say they are (if they refuse to verify via snap or insta's snap feature don't bother with them). If they are not local delete them immediately if they ever ask for money or give a sob story, no matter how long you've been chatting! Protect yourself and don't be a fool as the Internet can be amazing on one side (have many chat buds on Snap and other apps who have veri…

>delete them immediately if they ever ask for money or give a sob story, no matter how long you've been chatting!

So your internet friends will delete you immediately in your moment of need? How reassuring.

Re: Online Friends Are Real Friends

#73

Post by account42 »

PeterStuer wrote: post #9

Hard disagree. Online friends are easy to ditch. Real life friends are around wether you like it or not. That fact alone has huge repercussions.

Exactly. Perhaps OP was just lucky to never encounter any hardships that tested his online friendships before they moved to real life.

Re: Online Friends Are Real Friends

#74

Post by account42 »

sokoloff wrote: post #69
jacobgkau wrote: post #24

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The only situations you can't stop seeing someone you don't like IRL are: 1) School 2) Work 3) Very small town If you live in a major metro area, it's pretty easy to not see people, especially if you're actively wanting to avoid them.

4. Having kids together. 5. Having mutual friends. 6. Having common interests (playing in sports leagues, charity/volunteer work, active in local politics)

Exactly and many friendships are formed from sharing common spaces in the first place. Both online and offline - with the difference being that the online spaces have a one-click ban/block function while for offline spaces that's not as easy.

Re: Online Friends Are Real Friends

#75

Post by account42 »

bluefirebrand wrote: post #52
Jtarii wrote: post #45

Earlier quoted context omitted.

There are very few people that are schizoid enough to intentionally ignore a friend who comes to their door.

There are very few people that are schizoid enough to ignore someone saying "hey we're not friends anymore, don't contact me again" and then show up at their house

There are very few people what are schizoid enough to think that telling that to someone's face is remotely the same level as using an online block function. The latter has a much much lower barrier.

Re: Online Friends Are Real Friends

#76

Post by sznio »

evaneykelen wrote: post #4

My son made online friends when he was 14, playing games together with them on Steam. When he is playing a game with them, I often hear him roar with laughter, but they can also be quite serious and talk about life and school. Last month, we took him to Wrocław to meet them, and it was marvelous. My wife and I got to know the parents of these boys (16-17 yo now), had dinner together, and we separated as friends. My s…

I've been in a similar position 10 years ago when I was 16. I wanted to meet a bunch of friends from Arma 3, in Wrocław as well.

My parents didn't allow me to go. Years later I still hate them for it. I make sure they never know when I leave town now, since I'm not really in the mood to listen to my mom enumerating every way something bad can happen to me.

Let your fucking kid go. Especially when the kid isn't as retarded as you.

Re: Online Friends Are Real Friends

#77

Post by sznio »

for me, the non-committal nature of online friends is nice.

the best online friends are the people I've known for 15 years, whom I just message two/three times a year for a deep conversation.

IRL friends have too much IRL mess of scheduling, meeting up, solving the issue that friend A really dislikes friend B now yet you need to fit them at one party.

Re: Online Friends Are Real Friends

#78

Post by kalleboo »

PeterStuer wrote: post #9

Hard disagree. Online friends are easy to ditch. Real life friends are around wether you like it or not. That fact alone has huge repercussions.

My experience is real-life friends are more fleeting because you met them through geographic circumstances like school or work that change. Whereas your online friends are there no matter where life takes you.

Re: Online Friends Are Real Friends

#79

Post by Dependance »

acchow wrote: post #58
tomwheeler wrote: post #40

I once read about a father who told his daughter, "real friends are people who care how your life ends up." I think that's a pretty good definition to go by.

I agree with this wholeheartedly. Embracing this change in what you value in relationships is a key part of growing up. The shift from playing together (childhood) to having each others' backs (adolescence, college, 20s) to building up each others' lives (adulthood). Your true friends have bigger dreams for you than you have for yourself.

"Your true friends have bigger dreams for you than you have for yourself."

I like yours even more !

Re: Online Friends Are Real Friends

#80

Post by neuroticnews25 »

mihaic wrote: post #66

I'm sorry, but this is like saying "online sex is real sex". I'm sure some people can get the same stimulation, but it very much isn't the same. Humans need other humans, in flesh and blood in front of them. Bonding needs a physical presence. That's the only way our social processes have evolved. Given the sociability crisis and how having online friends can still have benefits, it's fine to paint them as something g…

I've had flesh and blood humans in front of me and it didn't feel good, maybe you're projecting.
Post reply on HN