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Mourning and moving on: rituals for leaving a career (2014)

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Re: Mourning and moving on: rituals for leaving a career (2014)

#121

Post by dakiol »

ryukoposting wrote: post #58

> We create meaning around the stress and soften transitions with rituals and rites of passage. I graduated into the height of the pandemic, so I never had a graduation ceremony. Instead, they played a shitty video presentation over Zoom and my parents cracked open a beer and watched it on TV. By the time I got invited back for a ceremony, I had already moved hundreds of miles away from my university. Obviously, I tu…

I didn’t assist my bachelor degree and master degree graduation. Same for high school.

But over here (southern and western europe), graduations are not like in the american movies. Never regretted not assisting.

Re: Mourning and moving on: rituals for leaving a career (2014)

#122

Post by vouaobrasil »

esafak wrote: post #65
vouaobrasil wrote: post #40

I'm afraid I can't relate. I initially invested a lot of time in my first choice of career (over a decade) and just left last year. I walked out the door, said goodbye, and the next day it was out of my mind. That being said, I think the key is keeping a strong mental separation between "passion for a field of work" and "predetermined path by society to actualize that passion". The latter, in my opinion, is something…

If you wanted to become a doctor, say, and flunked out of school, how would you find another path to become a doctor; start again in another country? Sometimes the cost of failure is high.

It is, but sometimes there is no choice but to do something else. And the cost of my own "failure" was high, though I wouldn't label it as a failure. That word is barely in my vocabulary...I prefer to consider it as a learning experience.

Re: Mourning and moving on: rituals for leaving a career (2014)

#123

Post by m463 »

Before leaving every job I've had, every one, I worried, I agonized, I second guessed myself...

And every new job, every one, within a short time, I thought "I should have done this sooner!"

I think we need to have a bias for moving forward, and I think it is healthy.

That said, I remember a friend who immediately quit their job (for a legitimate reason) without having another job lined up and regretted it. They told me they should have stayed cool, lined up another job first, and then quit.

Re: Mourning and moving on: rituals for leaving a career (2014)

#125

Post by rakejake »

nonrandomstring wrote: post #41
0xEF wrote: post #17

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I feel the need to point out that it's not difficult for people whose identity is not centered around their jobs, since I see that disconnect in the comments. I found the author's take full of the pageantry that I often associate with people who make big deals out of fairly inconsequential things, but before I begrudge the author their take, I have to remember that my career is of relatively little importance to me.…

In the 19th century you had the same job for life. If you were a blacksmith you stayed a blacksmith and died a blacksmith in the village where you were born. Your surname was synonymous with your skill. Wheeler. Smith. Potter. Even in the mid 20th century people worked for the same company for life. The "corporate" (body) world meant something very different than today. The corporation took care of you. It paid for y…

Excellent post.

Having an institution/career represent your passions, ambitions and most importantly your community is an immense luxury.

For the rest of us, it definitely makes more sense to put roots down in one place, build up community, indulge in the local arts scene etc -> exactly the kind of stuff that modern life is not aligned with. You cannot be moving around every few years and expect any sort of community.

Re: Mourning and moving on: rituals for leaving a career (2014)

#126

Post by ddingus »

I have never mourned on career changes. I do miss access to things associated with a former career. However, I can often buy or build what I need due to strong electromechanical skills developed along the way and or as side hustle skill builder type gigs taken oppertunistically.

Learning new things and working with others more skilled than I always pays off. I end up with the skill and have a pool of help available should I need it. I myself can help others too.

First change was from manufacturing as a prototype mechanic / planning production mfg engineer to pre-sales and training related to then high end CAD software and related systems engineering. (Sgi IRIX and Win NT) I could make almost anything I modeled.

Second change was from the CAD position to General management and engineering R&D at a small company needing some of both. This was fun. I got to use all accumulated skills. I picked up several more.

Third change was into the Additive Manufacturing industry as services lead, moving into product development.

Fourth and current is tech founder in an additive related startup about to be funded. This one also allows me to use all accumulated skills. Same industry, so this is more like a move, not change.

That is three real, leave old career behind type moves.

Times change, I tend to go where the opportunity is and will do what it takes to rapidly master new aspects while employing what I know and mentoring others, usually seeking to help make more of my type available. I have a few to my credit, all doing things in ways similar to my own path.

None of that was easy. Some of it was very difficult. All of it was fun and rewarding

The best thing I did along the way was to network, cultivate friendships and help others. When I need the same, I usually get it gladly.

Re: Mourning and moving on: rituals for leaving a career (2014)

#127

Post by gbuk2013 »

kanodiaashu wrote: post #10

Its interesting to me how you start with career maps. Maybe this is advertising, but I made a career mapping app here - https://www.moveup.ai/for-individuals - I wonder if you would find it interesting.

FYI I tried putting in my linked-in profile and it failed to pull in any data.

Re: Mourning and moving on: rituals for leaving a career (2014)

#128

Post by ddingus »

nonrandomstring wrote: post #41
0xEF wrote: post #17

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I feel the need to point out that it's not difficult for people whose identity is not centered around their jobs, since I see that disconnect in the comments. I found the author's take full of the pageantry that I often associate with people who make big deals out of fairly inconsequential things, but before I begrudge the author their take, I have to remember that my career is of relatively little importance to me.…

In the 19th century you had the same job for life. If you were a blacksmith you stayed a blacksmith and died a blacksmith in the village where you were born. Your surname was synonymous with your skill. Wheeler. Smith. Potter. Even in the mid 20th century people worked for the same company for life. The "corporate" (body) world meant something very different than today. The corporation took care of you. It paid for y…

Quality post that reflects my experience perfectly.

If we had a pin function, your contribution would be my choice.

Re: Mourning and moving on: rituals for leaving a career (2014)

#129

Post by albrewer »

ryukoposting wrote: post #58

> We create meaning around the stress and soften transitions with rituals and rites of passage. I graduated into the height of the pandemic, so I never had a graduation ceremony. Instead, they played a shitty video presentation over Zoom and my parents cracked open a beer and watched it on TV. By the time I got invited back for a ceremony, I had already moved hundreds of miles away from my university. Obviously, I tu…

> I sometimes wonder if I'll regret that choice later on down the line.

As a data point, I skipped mine to sleep in; no regrets 11 years later

Re: Mourning and moving on: rituals for leaving a career (2014)

#130

Post by kanodiaashu »

gbuk2013 wrote: post #127
kanodiaashu wrote: post #10

Its interesting to me how you start with career maps. Maybe this is advertising, but I made a career mapping app here - https://www.moveup.ai/for-individuals - I wonder if you would find it interesting.

FYI I tried putting in my linked-in profile and it failed to pull in any data.

oh; thanks for trying it - our linkedin api provider is imperfect. If you could try to put in your resume that would be great. I'm happy to get on a call and talk about it but no pressure.
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