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Ask HN: What's the worst advice you've ever received?

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51–60 of 78 posts

Re: Ask HN: What's the worst advice you've ever received?

#51

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This is the real answer. If you’re 26 in the Midwest, odds are many of the women a person would date are already married with a kid or two.

Not sure about US culture, but this seems to carry a peculiar assumption that men should date around same age? Because I doubt most 20yo women in "midwest" are married with a kid or two. Maybe some bits of cultural bagage you need to shed there.

The US is also very expensive place to live. If you don’t get with someone similar to yourself, you’re sandbagging your financial situation.

Most people can’t afford a single income household here in the US.

Re: Ask HN: What's the worst advice you've ever received?

#53

I had a mortgage broker try to get me into a variable rate mortgage I truly couldn't afford just before the rate hikes. "The Bank of Canada won't raise rates, they can't, it'll tank the market." I knew even then that was unhinged financial advice. This was a man who had a radio show about finances in Montreal. He also tried to saddle me with a real estate broker who only showed properties to me that she was selling (…

> This was a man who had a radio show about finances in Montreal.

That should've been a red flag.

Re: Ask HN: What's the worst advice you've ever received?

#54
post #32

There is a lot of bad advice I’ve received over the years: - you don’t need to go to a good university, this one (low tier uni in my country) is fine. - don’t fight bullies back. But the worst is not receiving bad advice, but receiving no advice at all, and staying in a dead-end job and city for too many years. Having no emotional support early in life leaves yourself “damaged” and gives you a cynical view of the wor…

The worst is when you finally

quit that dead end job | end that toxic relationship | start the business you've been dreaming of | write that book you're planning

and your friends suddenly start telling you how glad they are that you finally figured out the bad thing was hurting you.

Could have used that info while I was in the middle of it, my dude. Tell the people you care about when they are doing it wrong. If they can't see it, they will appreciate the outside viewpoint. If they can't take it, they're not good friends.

Re: Ask HN: What's the worst advice you've ever received?

#55
post #22

Don't become a computer programmer, the industry is being outsourced to India. So I became a plumber instead. Don't have to worry about someone from India flying here to crawl under a house to snake out a line.

Doesn't sound THAT different than my programming job. It's pipes full of shit either way...

Re: Ask HN: What's the worst advice you've ever received?

#57
"work smart, not hard"

i think this advice is a bit too vague and it's just something people say to sound smart to trick people into thinking there's a shortcut to mastery

i genuinely believe that if you work hard to hone your skill on something, it will do you good. if you want to get good at something, you gotta put in the hours, the grind. e.g. to learn how to play a tennis, you gotta, you know, actually get down to the court and play tennis instead of watching tutorial on how to play tennis. Same goes with programming, music, etc.

now pair working hard with the ability to retrospect -- you'll master a lot of skills in life

Re: Ask HN: What's the worst advice you've ever received?

#58

"Just be yourself". Such terrible, useless advice to give to someone who is struggling with dating.

No it is the right advice. The key is to improve yourself and make yourself more attractive. Accomplish more, work out, become more capable, make more $ etc.

I did that myself by improving my diet, doing kick boxing, get educated, interact more with woman etc. It worked.

If you don’t, you will end up with a partner who loves your fake persona and not you. Forcing you to continue living a fake life. That is not a healthy way to live.

Re: Ask HN: What's the worst advice you've ever received?

#59
post #31

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Maybe it should be "become yourself"

"bootstrap your future now" or "reach into the future and pull the best possible rendition of yourself backwards to now forthwith such that you can become thatself once thineself agrees that it is indeed thou that thou wishes to become"

Believe in the me who believes in you.
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