Maybe the earth/environment collapsing around them while nobody does anything to fix it is also depressing.
Or at least all the constant doomsaying about it
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New Study Says Maybe Helicopter Parenting Is Making Kids Depressed
61–70 of 180 posts
Re: New Study Says Maybe Helicopter Parenting Is Making Kids Depressed
#62Maybe the earth/environment collapsing around them while nobody does anything to fix it is also depressing.
My belief as well.
"Hey kids. You're inheriting a cluster fuck. There's hate, and war, and gloom & doom around every corner. But look, we give you...The Kardashians!!! And never forget, here's a never ending list of things you need to worry about...Don't go outside, it's dangerous. Eat this shite fake food and they worry about your heakth...and so on..."
But it's social media to blame??? That disconnect would be funny if it wasn't so sad.
Re: New Study Says Maybe Helicopter Parenting Is Making Kids Depressed
#63Earlier quoted context omitted.
Growing up in a rural area I rode my bike all over the place. Should see a difference with rural vs urban as well.
I grew up in a rural area as well but in my mind it is no different or possibly worse - farther distances meant biking was a necessity versus walking, zero bike infrastructure so I had to be commingled with vehicular traffic, and that traffic was going much faster than in a city due to the wide openness of the roads and no need to stop for far distances. I think it was far more dangerous.
Yet we biked everywhere and had no issues remaining mobile. Kids are more trusted to look after themselves in rural areas, adults are as well really.
Re: New Study Says Maybe Helicopter Parenting Is Making Kids Depressed
#64Just my personal experience working as a psychologist with kids: The kids who were overly protected had about the same amount of problems as the kids from seriously neglected homes. So when I want to make my case for NOT overprotecting kids, I say: "If you really want to damage your kid: Protect them from all adversity." I do think that the whole "suicide is increasing" trope is seldom put in context. Of course, it's…
> By contrast, it is so good to see that death by drowning and car accidents have plummeted over the last 50 years. Yes, less deaths are obviously a positive. However, could this be because of helicopter'ing adults? From kids not being allowed to be kids and put themselves in adverse places and face tough decisions? Mom won't let Johnny drive, she drives instead. Dad won't let Jane go out with friends on a camping tr…
I don't think that the implication is that "helicopter parenting" is doing it. The article posted by GP says this (and provides references):
"This has been attributed to the widespread adoption of seat belts and appropriate child safety seats, the production of cars with improved safety standards, better constructed roads, graduated driver-licensing programs, and a focus on reducing teen drinking and driving"
Re: New Study Says Maybe Helicopter Parenting Is Making Kids Depressed
#65Earlier quoted context omitted.
> Suburbia may have little traffic, but they are also devoid of "third places" where teens can be teens. When I was a teen there was no pre-made concept of "third places". We made our own. Most of the time, this meant being outside doing something active. We didn't want to be inside. We didn't want to watch TV or even binge-play video games. We created our own ways of keeping us busy, entertained, socially connected,…
You may not have used them but there were definitely third spaces for children and teens in the form of play areas and parks. Add skate parks to that list if you grew up in the early 00s, and probably something else before that.
Maybe. But we got on our bikes and went there. We'd sonetime bike 20 miles in a day...for kicks. Just to bike.
There's a third place in every kid's head - and every adult's head - if we don't exercise that muscle (so to speak) we will lose it.
The evidence seems to say we are losing it. The adults, and in turn the kids.
Fwiw, I liken the situation to Legos. When I was a kid you bought "raw" legos and then created whatever TF we could imagine.
No. Wrong. Answers.
Today, Legos are highly kit-focused. That is, build THIS. There is a right and wrong answer. Ffs Legos today intentionally mitigate the opportunity for kids to color outside the lines. Just the though of that straight-jacket is demoralizing.
p.s. Yes we occasionally went to a skateboard park. But we also built our own ramp for when we couldn't. We also found a drainage ditch in the woods off Rt 195 that we frequented in the summer. 100% adult-free.
The "Dogtown and Z-Boys" story could never happen today. Not to belittle depression but that's depressing.
Re: New Study Says Maybe Helicopter Parenting Is Making Kids Depressed
#66I am a victim of this and was depressed until, I took control of my life. The worst part is, all of your life decision are taken by the parents and you feel at odds at your own emotions when you grow up to become an adult. Now a days, any words that my parent utter, even if the advice is a good one, I never take them seriously. Lost trust on both the parents.
I feel very similarly having grown up with a very overprotective and overly attached mother. I'm constantly struggling with emotions and have a lot of self doubt and don't feel like Im in control of my life. Been slowly regaining this control and trying to improve myself via therapy. Unfortunately right now I don't value my parents very much and Im resentful towards my mother. Perhaps that will change in future, perh…
People are not perfect. I know it's hard now but I urge you not to resent your mother. If she was otherwise kind then she was just overprotective and overly attached because she loves you.
Re: New Study Says Maybe Helicopter Parenting Is Making Kids Depressed
#67Re: New Study Says Maybe Helicopter Parenting Is Making Kids Depressed
#68Just my personal experience working as a psychologist with kids: The kids who were overly protected had about the same amount of problems as the kids from seriously neglected homes. So when I want to make my case for NOT overprotecting kids, I say: "If you really want to damage your kid: Protect them from all adversity." I do think that the whole "suicide is increasing" trope is seldom put in context. Of course, it's…
I had to read this twice, because it seemed like you said that overprotective, and neglective parents have the same outcomes, but I think you are mostly trying to say that parents which are neither overprotective nor neglective have a lower rate of issues right?
>overprotective, and neglective parents have the same outcomes
I think that is what they were saying; I've seen the stat elsewhere, that extremely spoiling children produces just as bad outcomes on average as neglecting them.
Re: New Study Says Maybe Helicopter Parenting Is Making Kids Depressed
#69Just my personal experience working as a psychologist with kids: The kids who were overly protected had about the same amount of problems as the kids from seriously neglected homes. So when I want to make my case for NOT overprotecting kids, I say: "If you really want to damage your kid: Protect them from all adversity." I do think that the whole "suicide is increasing" trope is seldom put in context. Of course, it's…
I had to read this twice, because it seemed like you said that overprotective, and neglective parents have the same outcomes, but I think you are mostly trying to say that parents which are neither overprotective nor neglective have a lower rate of issues right?
OP said same amount of problems not the same problems or same outcome. As in, sheltered kids will fail as much, becoming alcoholics, criminals, depressed and frustrated with not accomplishing things their parents made easier for them.
Re: New Study Says Maybe Helicopter Parenting Is Making Kids Depressed
#70The title blames "helicopter parenting" while the actual study blames the lack of independent mobility: > Considerable research, mostly in Europe, has focused on children’s independent mobility (CIM), defined as children’s freedom to travel in their neighborhood or city without adult accompaniment Isn't that lack of independent mobility largely caused by car-centric urban planning? Children and teens can't safely roa…
I would say the root cause of children's independent mobility (or lack thereof) is parents' perception of how dangerous it would be to give kids that freedom - a perception that may or may not be strongly correlated with the real risk profile. Of course there's also a social angle, if all other parents gawp at you or even threaten to report you to social services for giving your kids more freedom, then you're most likely going to give in.
Car-centric planning is definitely a contributing factor, but I can think of others such as crime (or fear of crime), legislation (if it's a crime to let kids under X years unsupervised in public). Suburban sprawl has mang negative effects but it can sometimes produce walkable areas and quiet residential roads that it's safe to play on too. You might need a car to get to any capital-p Places, but you can kick a football around the local cul-de-sac just fine.
You can also have places where there's safe and reliable public trnasport, and still have heated debates in the local parent-teacher association about when it's safe to let your kid ride on their own.