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A complete guide to getting what you want (2018)
41–50 of 146 posts
Re: A complete guide to getting what you want (2018)
#42Another way to getting what you want of course, is to think about what you really want and change that to something you can achieve almost immediately. The article alludes to this: > Do you want to be self-employed? Or do you just need some time off from your normally-tolerable day job? Do you truly want washboard abs, or just to see an energetic, healthy person in the mirror for once? And: > There can also be things…
The prevailing school of thought in modern psychology even recommends to prioritize values/ideals over goals. Unlike the latter, the former is an inexhaustible resource. You can always be kinder, more honest/authentic etc, and no external circumstance can take this away from you. Goal-setting is still important (especially in the short term), but only as a means to live according to your values.
Unfortunately, we’ve been conditioned by the modern society to prioritize goals over ideals and then be unhappy/frustrated/annoyed when we either don’t “get what we want” or do but feel unfulfilled because it didn’t bring us the satisfaction we sought, or it was too short-lived, and now we want “more”.
Re: A complete guide to getting what you want (2018)
#43> Quite often a reasonable, achievable, and worthwhile desire goes unpursued because we have a simultaneous desire to not pursue it. When we say something is “impossible” or “too hard” or “not in the cards,” that’s a clue. This resonates. Many who are stuck frustrated not getting what they want have talked themselves out of trying to get it to begin with. A good another clue is 3rd party attribution. "My life is bad…
Ask for the moon and you'll be surprised by how often you get it.
Re: A complete guide to getting what you want (2018)
#44Earlier quoted context omitted.
It’s a self-truthing statement. As in, everyone who doesn’t agree with you is also excluded from your criteria. So from your point of view, you are absolutely right. It goes like this: - Papa deer: “Remember son, you have the power to make objects move by thought. If you see a car rolling towards you, STARE at it straight in the headlights and concentrate and move it with your mind.” - Son deer: “Isn’t that how grand…
i also sold my startup to a good outcome and ran the business very profitably for years and i agree that there are some things that can not be taught - but that doesn't mean they can't be learned if you have the right mental models. at one point i was terrible at dating / women but over the years i've gotten a lot better than where i started. and yes, there are some people who are just hopeless because they refuse to…
The kind of relationship you described sounds terrible to be in. I hope this isn’t the norm.
Re: A complete guide to getting what you want (2018)
#45I wonder how do you avoid a situation in mid-life where you've achieved accomplished, etc, and now really lack a strong desire for anything? How do you find your motivation?
Re: A complete guide to getting what you want (2018)
#46Earlier quoted context omitted.
i also sold my startup to a good outcome and ran the business very profitably for years and i agree that there are some things that can not be taught - but that doesn't mean they can't be learned if you have the right mental models. at one point i was terrible at dating / women but over the years i've gotten a lot better than where i started. and yes, there are some people who are just hopeless because they refuse to…
The kind of relationship you described sounds terrible to be in. I hope this isn’t the norm.
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Re: A complete guide to getting what you want (2018)
#47I wonder how do you avoid a situation in mid-life where you've achieved accomplished, etc, and now really lack a strong desire for anything? How do you find your motivation?
That's when you chill out and enjoy life for a bit
Re: A complete guide to getting what you want (2018)
#48Is there a guide for knowing what you want?
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Re: A complete guide to getting what you want (2018)
#49Is there a guide for knowing what you want?
I recommend you look at Effective Altruism . Can there be anything more-fulfilling or less regret-on-your-deathbed than helping others (while knowing you're doing it in the most effective way you can)? There are hobbies for sure, but when you spend 80,000 Hours in a career which you feel helps no one but you with your income, you might find mid-life there are more-important things. https://www.effectivealtruism.org/…
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Re: A complete guide to getting what you want (2018)
#50Is there a guide for knowing what you want?
I recommend you look at Effective Altruism . Can there be anything more-fulfilling or less regret-on-your-deathbed than helping others (while knowing you're doing it in the most effective way you can)? There are hobbies for sure, but when you spend 80,000 Hours in a career which you feel helps no one but you with your income, you might find mid-life there are more-important things. https://www.effectivealtruism.org/…
I used to believe in Effective Altruism but the older I get the more I realise that it’s just another “feel good” philanthropy for rich people movement with completely warped values around so called rationality, utilitarianism and technological saviour complexes. If one reads the website and the projects accomplished most of them are completely vapid. Malaria nets? AI assignment research? Some high brow research institute? Real help is helping people to improve their lives at a personal level, not saving them a couple of bucks while banking. To anyone reading this, don’t fall for this. It’s no wonder Sam Bankman Fried was so closely advocating for Effective Altruism, it’s just the same old virtue signaling, but with a bit of rationality injected in.