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In praise of blowing up your life

sashachapin.substack.com

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Re: In praise of blowing up your life

#321

Post by Taikonerd »

akprasad wrote: post #117
Gareth321 wrote: post #93

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It depends if one interprets "trad wife" to mean "far-right cultural atavism" or "traditional wife." I try to listen to those who subscribe to the movement, and they report the latter, every time. It seems those who interpret it as "far-right cultural atavism" refuse to actually listen to the women who find meaning in the lifestyle. Inasmuch, I see these articles strongly linked, and I find the juxtaposition really i…

The Onion clearly takes the former reading in their piece. I mean, it's barely subtext: - "I wanted to live all my internalized misogyny" - "Replenishing the white race is a full time job in itself" - "A feminist cut me off in traffic once" - "I believe in choosing a marital structure from an arbitrary point in human history and pretending it represents some kind of inviolable rule.” But if you find value in juxtapos…

I used to like The Onion before they got super preachy...

Re: In praise of blowing up your life

#322

Post by scarface_74 »

cutenewt wrote: post #300
scarface_74 wrote: post #112

I’ve mentioned the last year of my life on HN where my wife and I decided to get rid of everything we own that wouldn’t fit in four suitcases including our cars and we became “hybrid digital nomads”. We fly to different cities across the US and stay in midrange extended stay hotels and stay in our own “Condotel”[1] the other six months in Florida. What I haven’t talked about is what got us to this point. I grew up in…

Condo rental pool is a term I've never come across before. What rental pool service did you use?

A developer creates a standard resort hotel and then sells individual units out as condos.

You can (and most people do) use the onsite property management company. All of the individual owners make their units available as inventory to the property management company when they are not staying there. The property manager should have an algorithm to ensure units are occupied equitably.

Re: In praise of blowing up your life

#323

Post by hayst4ck »

marginalia_nu wrote: post #199
lm28469 wrote: post #194

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yes there is a lot of wiggle room, but the majority of it is working on yourself, not fleeing

If you're living in a place in which you are not happy, with people you don't like, then leaving may be absolutely what you should do. You don't have to put up with relationships that aren't working.

> If you're living in a place in which you are not happy, with people you don't like,

The epiphany happens when you realize it's probably not the place or the people who are making you unhappy, but yourself and your beliefs.

That's what "wherever you go, there you are" means. It means you can't escape your self and you have to confront who you are no matter where you physically are.

This person is avoidant. That means when his wife did things rather than having an "us vs the problem" mindset, he is looking for the door. That means the woman over time will come to understand that she's not good enough, or there's an expiration on their time together. This raises the stakes for even small disagreements and creates a self fulfilling prophecy that ends the relationship.

So he hurt her by not being attached, and she acted in ways that made him unhappy as a result.

It was him ultimately that created his own unhappiness.

Re: In praise of blowing up your life

#324

Post by hutzlibu »

badpun wrote: post #311
hutzlibu wrote: post #210

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Rather stick with old bitter people, who regret not being young anymore? Personally I can find wisdom in 2 year olds babbling, as well as 90 years old. It depends on the person and time. I discovered, that you can learn something from any person (even if it is, how not to do things). And age is not the determining factor.

> Personally I can find wisdom in 2 year olds babbling Such as?

Enjoying the moment. The excitement of new experiences. Saying what you want without filters. And literally covering your ears, if there is too much noise, opposed to smiling and accepting all unpleasant things.

Re: In praise of blowing up your life

#325

Post by hutzlibu »

badpun wrote: post #314
hutzlibu wrote: post #193

Earlier quoted context omitted.

"One doesn't realize in early life that the price of freedom is loneliness. To be happy one must be tied." There are traveller communities. You hook up, spend time together, split up and meet some of them around the globe later, if you want to.

True bonds require years and decades of frequent interactions to grow.

Nope. I have stronger bonds with people I met only a short, but very intense time, compared to most people I know all my life.

But in general yes, frequent meeting in person is nice and needed.

Re: In praise of blowing up your life

#326

Post by scarface_74 »

googlryas wrote: post #319
antisthenes wrote: post #275

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Right, so the "secret" to blowing up your life is just to have massive savings, income and rental property, so that instead of owning your possessions, you can just rent them for 2x the cost of ownership while being a digital nomad. Got it. Just in case someone finds this "profound".

It's not like OP said "Anyone can do it just like this!". It's just what they did. Is it really so shocking to you that richer people have more opportunities in their lives than poorer people?

See my sibling reply.

It didn’t take being “rich”.

My budget is lower than it was when I was making $135K (the median college educated couple in the US makes that much) when I had my house built in 2016.

The only thing different that I’m doing based on my income now is subsidizing the rent for my younger son instead of selling my old house and paying cash for the Condotel I bought. It was the same price in 2022 as what I bought in 2016.

Re: In praise of blowing up your life

#327

Post by hayst4ck »

whitepaint wrote: post #124
hayst4ck wrote: post #121

Earlier quoted context omitted.

"One doesn't realize in early life that the price of freedom is loneliness. To be happy one must be tied." ~ CS Lewis I don't know the context of the quote and I know next to nothing about CS Lewis, but having blown my life up at one point and experienced freedom on a level few on this planet could achieve (health, money, time, and will) the quote rang very true for me. I think some people grow up in a community and…

> "Always be surrounded by love..." unless you are gay. Gay, trans, atheist, feminist, brown, an opioid addict, a questioner of authority, or otherwise different. Or a middle-aged white man. https://afsp.org/suicide-statistics/

Middle aged white men can be almost any of those things I listed.

It floors me that you aren't flagged.

Not because you mentioned middle aged white men (which I am), but because I am talking about reasons people get kicked out of the usually conservative communities they grow up in. Being a middle aged white man is not one of those reasons.

Middle aged white men can choose their community. Being an atheist I was kicked out of mine.

There's a difference between not choosing a community and not being welcome in it.

Your response reeks of "white lives matter" to me.

Re: In praise of blowing up your life

#328

Post by hayst4ck »

version_five wrote: post #250
hayst4ck wrote: post #121

Earlier quoted context omitted.

"One doesn't realize in early life that the price of freedom is loneliness. To be happy one must be tied." ~ CS Lewis I don't know the context of the quote and I know next to nothing about CS Lewis, but having blown my life up at one point and experienced freedom on a level few on this planet could achieve (health, money, time, and will) the quote rang very true for me. I think some people grow up in a community and…

> "Always be surrounded by love..." unless you are gay. Gay, trans, atheist, feminist, brown, an opioid addict, a questioner of authority, or otherwise different. Questioner of authority doesn't belong on that list. All the others are mainstream things with media and political advocacy behind them. The last is a "denier" or "conspiracy theorist". 30 years ago they all might have belonged together (expect we had less…

Communities have authority structures and questioning the basic assumptions of communities (should we allow gay people into our church?) is definitely ostracize-able behavior.

Re: In praise of blowing up your life

#329

Post by googlryas »

scarface_74 wrote: post #326
googlryas wrote: post #319

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's not like OP said "Anyone can do it just like this!". It's just what they did. Is it really so shocking to you that richer people have more opportunities in their lives than poorer people?

See my sibling reply. It didn’t take being “rich”. My budget is lower than it was when I was making $135K (the median college educated couple in the US makes that much) when I had my house built in 2016. The only thing different that I’m doing based on my income now is subsidizing the rent for my younger son instead of selling my old house and paying cash for the Condotel I bought. It was the same price in 2022 as wh…

It's not just about income, but also your assets. From your description, I don't think it is wrong to call you rich, or at least above average net worth and income. Also, you making $135k solo is a much better situation than you+partner making $135k combined as might happen with the median college couple. You doing it solo means your partner can put all their time into...well..whatever they want.

I don't really see anything wrong with your reply, I was mostly replying to the person who was whining that you have to be rich to do it. But I do think, if you had less income and fewer assets you would need to go about doing what you did in a different way.

Re: In praise of blowing up your life

#330

Post by antisthenes »

scarface_74 wrote: post #295
bmoxb wrote: post #290

Earlier quoted context omitted.

On an individual-level then sure, but less people buying flight tickets will obviously lead to airlines eventually running less flights.

It’s even more nuanced. Airlines don’t make money on main cabin for the most part. They make money from business class https://www.zippia.com/advice/business-travel-statistics/ and selling miles to credit card companies. https://airlinegeeks.com/2021/12/17/here-s-why-airline-loyal... If main cabin dropped by half, they would still fly the routes.

> It’s even more nuanced. Airlines don’t make money on main cabin for the most part. They make money from business class

No, it's not. Where they make their money is completely orthogonal to how demand for flights is generated.

All passengers generate flight demand, so yes, they are just as responsible for CO2 emissions as the airline (you can argue about the proportions and degrees, but they still are) The airline is additionally responsible by not pricing in externality costs of CO2 emissions.

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