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People who die by suicide want to stop suffering, not to stop living
101–110 of 443 posts
Re: People who die by suicide want to stop suffering, not to stop living
#102I fully intend to kill myself eventually. The idea that I should prolong my life past the point where I get dementia, a degenerative disease, or just plain old age where I can't stand up or whipe my ass is repugnant enough that I can't understand people who want me to suffer until doctors finally stop being able to put me back together. Much better to die cheaply with a wonderful cocktail of opiates while watching a…
Much easier said than done. I doubt you'll feel the same way when that old age approaches, just like teenagers who think life is practically over by 40.
The people I know that are really old or the people I have known rather generally weren't too thrilled with living at that point. When your quality of life is really poor, living seems like more trouble than it's worth. I wonder if some of those people have a lot of agency over just letting their body stop working.
Re: People who die by suicide want to stop suffering, not to stop living
#103I fully intend to kill myself eventually. The idea that I should prolong my life past the point where I get dementia, a degenerative disease, or just plain old age where I can't stand up or whipe my ass is repugnant enough that I can't understand people who want me to suffer until doctors finally stop being able to put me back together. Much better to die cheaply with a wonderful cocktail of opiates while watching a…
Much easier said than done. I doubt you'll feel the same way when that old age approaches, just like teenagers who think life is practically over by 40.
>just like teenagers who think life is practically over by 40
Sorry but... it kind of is, no? You've probably got a family weighing you down so you can't travel anymore. You don't have the freedom to start new exciting ventures. You can't quit your sucky job because it supports your family. You go to parties that end at 9pm and your social gatherings consist of talking about traffic and grocery prices. You're probably married to someone you love and respect, but the flame isn't the same as what you once had.
Just my perspective as a 22 year old.
Re: People who die by suicide want to stop suffering, not to stop living
#104Re: People who die by suicide want to stop suffering, not to stop living
#105at lowest for me it was normal to be in bed for 16-20 hours a day in agonizing pain and horrific migraines. Dozens of doctor appointments had mostly been a waste. They all claimed it was anxiety. Realized one morning that I had spent hours thinking how wonderful it would be to never wake up again. Have kids, and the would end up in state care without me. (No family capable of caring for them) Started trying every sug…
What/was is the cause of the pain and migraines? What triggered the fix, if you know? (The transition from bed to a kayak)
Re: People who die by suicide want to stop suffering, not to stop living
#106Crazy this showed up today.
I do this 'existential calculus' quite often. I also sometimes wonder what the point is when it just gets worse every year.
My therapist told me it's because I'm a survivor, it's what I do. But what's the point of surviving? At what point do I get to live, much less be happy?
She pointed out it would be throwing away all my battle scars, all the effort I'd put in to get this far. Just think about how much better I'd feel when it did get better and I came out the other side.
I pointed out it sounded like sunk cost fallacy to me.
He next question was whether I was an organ donor. I've not spoken to anyone since.
I was thinking about Chris Cornell and Chester Bennington yesterday. If they couldn't get past their pain, what hope have I?
It's a day to day struggle, but also one I know I'm going to lose one day. I completely see why people turn to hard drugs, I consider opioids daily almost. The only reason I don't try them is I feel I'd rather skip the addiction and even worse pain and just fast-forward to the end. Again, the existential calculus.
Re: People who die by suicide want to stop suffering, not to stop living
#107I've heard someone describe suicidal ideation as like being halfway through a multiplayer game where you are getting stomped: It's not that you want to rage quit, it's just that the outcome feels inevitable so you wish you could skip to the end. Or like turning off a ball game early when your team is down by an insurmountable points at the end of the third quarter.
For at least some people, it may not be that they want to die, rather it may be that they predict 30+ more years of an unsatisfying life and wish that they could just skip to the end.
Re: People who die by suicide want to stop suffering, not to stop living
#108Earlier quoted context omitted.
Should people quote DFW as an authority given his suicide? Using metaphors of physical reality for psychological states can make it falsely appear more immutable that it is. It is possible to escape the burning buildings of the mind and knowing that you have agency over your ideas can be an essential part of the reframing/rethinking/challenging that can free you from suffering. Letting people believe they are in a si…
I think to portray it otherwise would be to lose the message, and the fact that Wallace commited suicide should give credibility that the thoughts he wrote beforehand were those of an eventually suicidal man. In my opinion, without the immutability of the situation the metaphor loses its meaning. People don't kill themselves because they feel they're in a situation they can get out of. I think it does more harm for t…
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Re: People who die by suicide want to stop suffering, not to stop living
#109No shit..
Re: People who die by suicide want to stop suffering, not to stop living
#110I don't really buy that it is like... strictly that desire. I think something is different in their physiology or psychology. I know people who were so sick they're barely staying alive and their lives are absolute miserable nonsense and they even verbally express not wanting to deal with it but they still just have self-care habits that keep themselves stable. Maybe it is something like that's a precursor to losing those habits but I don't know I've seen the behavior for multiple years.