Starting to get to the age where my oldest daughter is demanding access to social media because all her friends are using it. Surprised more parents aren’t aware of the harms.
I'm just moving into this phase as well. The same parents that said it was ridiculous kids have phones, are now getting their kids phones. I've heard that not having a phone is essentially like knowing the whole school is invited to party, except you. I'm really not sure what to do.
Why some researchers think I’m wrong about social media and mental illness
541–550 of 580 posts
Re: Why some researchers think I’m wrong about social media and mental illness
#542Earlier quoted context omitted.
It's definitely a coordination problem. While all the kids might be better off without access to social media, the one kid who doesn't when everybody else does gets a significant alienation downside, probably more than cancelling out the benefits.
That seems more like an upside if their 'peers' are indeed so easily addicted. It seems preferable to be alienated from such a coordinated network of addicts.
Re: Why some researchers think I’m wrong about social media and mental illness
#543Earlier quoted context omitted.
I don't believe in free will. I haven't really for about 20 years or so. However, I act as if I do, as I've always done. It's a habit I choose not to break. Changing to act as I believe would be too much for me to handle. I would need to rethink pretty much everything I do. It's a completely different set of axioms in every domain of human knowledge, ethics, behaviour and interaction. I don't think I'm raving mad, bu…
Not that I agree with your premise, but why would you personally adopt a cognitive dissonance? A healthy mind is generally regarded as satisfied with itself as it is free of self-contradictions.
It's so different than all the constructs we've created, you can kind of throw "generally regarded" out the window, frankly :) (don't mean that to sound harsh if it does). All of psychology would need to be rewritten. By me? I guess?
The 3rd option is to try and convince myself of what I regard as a lie (that we have free will), which is also difficult, but probably easier?
Re: Why some researchers think I’m wrong about social media and mental illness
#544Earlier quoted context omitted.
So if your peers have a nice fat ass that the boys all like to oggle at while walking between classes and you're stuck with a skinny thigh gapping flapjack white girl tush you bet your ass you're gonna start eating some cheese berders. The feeling of wanting to fit in is constant for teens. What 'fitting in' looks like changes over time. What's desired has changed over time in my life alone. Booty is a great example.…
> What's desired has changed over time in my life alone. Booty is a great example. I grew up with mostly white women in media shaming themselves and asking if their dress made their ass look fat while also trying to get boob implants. The "ideal body" is actually healthier now than it was 20 years ago. But I'm not talking about skinny vs a few curves. I'm talking obese. Clinically obese. As in BMI over 30. https://ww…
So you agree that the 'ideal body' does not necessarily mean it's 'heathier' and because the 'ideal' changes through time.
Re: Why some researchers think I’m wrong about social media and mental illness
#545Earlier quoted context omitted.
The child mental health industrial complex which started in the 2000's and has boomed over the last decade as parents have been bombarded with the message that they need to rush their kids off to a therapist at the slightest sign of normal teenage angst or they are bad parents. Schools have bought into this and participate in the messaging. Once under "treatment" kids are repeatedly told they have anxiety and/or depr…
I find it very hard to believe that an otherwise healthy person can spiral into depression simply by hearing about it a lot.
I had no success, but suggestibility of illnesses and conditions is a huge topic in psychology. There were many induced cases of conditions that stopped when the "patients" stopped therapy.
There are many reasons why patients would accept such a false diagnosis. I don't believe this is the case here, though.
Re: Why some researchers think I’m wrong about social media and mental illness
#546Earlier quoted context omitted.
> Try dressing different from the norm in the 1990s before people even had cellphones in class and you'd definitely end up ostracized I think that's a part of OP's point. After that, if you wanted, you could go away to college and buy normal clothes and reinvent yourself completely. Nowadays, if you're a person who agrees for whatever reason is a shitheel, you're that same shitheel forever, and the inertia required t…
Why do you think that? Most people don't have the energy to keep track of people they disagreed with once in the past.
Howard Dean's political career was ruined and is largely defined by one poorly timed on-air scream after it was mocked by late night comedy hosts.
If you remember Lindy Chamberlain at all, it's probably as the "Dingos ate my baby" lady, whose name was dragged through the mud and went to prison for years before it was revealed likely that dingos had almost certainly eaten her baby.
Chris Jeffries was questioned in the murder of Joanna Yates.
Richard Jewell. Fatty Arbuckle. Bruce Ismay. Rebecca Black. Kevin Carter. Monica Lewinsky. The McDonald's Coffee Lady (Stella Liebeck). If you remember any of these names, it's almost certainly for something bad they were accused of doing.
I've seen studies that show that because our brains are our foremost self-defense mechanisms, they're constantly looking for bad patterns to avoid, so we remember the bad things about people much more readily than we remember the good. That we do so for faraway people with whom we'll never likely have any contact is likely low on the utility scale, but we mostly haven't adapted to avoiding it.
Actors who manage to land parts doing crime scene reenactments for true crime docudramas tend to regret them, because people at the grocery see the actors and forget they were watching television and assume he's a serial murderer.
We rely on our intuitions so much when meeting new people, and our brains hold onto negative impressions so strongly that even though you think you don't have the energy to keep track of it, the brain actually does. Perhaps not just over a disagreement, but if you form a negative connotation around a picture of someone internet infamous, cognitive bias ensures that you'll likely dislike them if you ever actually meet and they'll have to actively work to overcome that negative preconception despite us having formed that preconception based on perhaps as little as 10 seconds of their life portrayed out of context.
If you do not dislike anyone that you haven't met (e.g., a politician, or polarizing celebrity like Logan Paul or Joe Rogan or Elon Musk) then congrats, you're in the (presumably) low percentage of people who don't have this affliction. But I think it's a pretty big stretch to say that "most" don't.
Re: Why some researchers think I’m wrong about social media and mental illness
#547Earlier quoted context omitted.
The 100 corporations thing is silly. They aren't out there polluting for the fun of it, they're making stuff for people and organizations. If people and governments and companies stop buying gas, the pollution on Chevron's ledger for oil extraction and refining will plummet as they get stuck with smaller markets like plastic manufacturing. Those dastardly 100 corporations are emitting to make stuff for you.
But there are many ways to make all of this stuff. Many times there are better ways and less harmful ways, but those are basically always less profitable. This is capitalism and the one and only objective is profit. It's never going to be working towards having a sustainable world, getting better stuff, getting less useless stuff, etc. We don't need half the stupid stuff that's being sold to us and we keep buying it…
Disagreeing on what things are important is just the human condition.
Re: Why some researchers think I’m wrong about social media and mental illness
#548Earlier quoted context omitted.
>To conform their outward presentation to the gender they identify with, which is a fact rooted in biology. I'm sorry but how is that not also self expression? >The vast majority of the world does not embrace white American notions of individualistic self expression. We think norm enforcement and conformity are good things that help kids stay on track. Both Youngkin in VA and DeSantis in FL won majorities among Hispa…
> I'm sorry but how is that not also self expression? Rachel Levine (a trans woman) dresses how she does for the same reason I (a cis man) do. Both our brains have a notion of our own sex, and we conform to society’s gender norms consistent with that internal understanding. It’s completely different than people who dress the way they do, or get tattoos or nose rings to make a statement, set themselves apart as indivi…
> Not at all. You characterized my position as “incel” above, because the people having all the kids mostly share my viewpoint. It’s the dominant view in Asia, Africa, the Middle East, etc. Liberal Americans are the most pathologically individualistic people in the world.
No, I categorized your position as being espoused by incels. Which is true. I don't care what you are.
> It’s the dominant view in Asia, Africa, the Middle East, etc. Liberal Americans are the most pathologically individualistic people in the world.
Well, we are talking about American culture here so I'm not sure what you think your point serves.
Re: Why some researchers think I’m wrong about social media and mental illness
#549Earlier quoted context omitted.
Responding to an actual poster here isn't that. Also, who are the alleged extremists on the left? You are just revealing your personal disagreement with my positions.
My mistake. None of the positions held by anyone on the left is extreme in the least.
Re: Why some researchers think I’m wrong about social media and mental illness
#550Earlier quoted context omitted.
>Case in point, my son and his friends have a small discord server. And they play minecraft on a shared server. This not the same as scrolling TikTok / Instagram. But it's a degree of independence somewhat away from parental eyes. I think not enough people here are understanding the distinction between a communication tool (eg. discord), doom-scrolling platform like tiktok, and video games. A discord server can be ve…
Video games are a sore subject in my house... I grew up with them and I turned out arguably okay (healthy, employable, sociable, etc). But my wife thinks they are the bane of society. And it wasn't until recently that I realized how much the "endgame" of video games has shifted since my childhood in the 90s. Back then, it seemed like the majority of games had an actual end, or they continued to get progressively pain…