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Why don’t more people live close to friends?

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Re: Why don’t more people live close to friends?

#371

Post by GoldenRacer »

mcv wrote: post #318
hibikir wrote: post #163

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If anything, you are being too nice to US suburbs: It's perfectly possible to have towns that are much denser than any US suburb. My Spanish home town has about 100K inhabitants: You'd not call that a city anywhere in the US. And yet, It's basically a circle with a one mile radius: Yes, just one mile. In that situation, one can walk everywhere, and public transportation is limited to the elderly, people carrying heav…

I always struggle with the difference between a town and a city, because Dutch has only one word for them: stad. A stad (plural "steden" is something that in the middle ages had city rights (or is it town rights?), a dorp (village) does not. And this has lead Netherland to have some steden of only a few hundred inhabitants, while some villages have more than 100,000, which of course makes no sense. The place I grew u…

Cities and towns sound pretty similar to your steden and dorp. The US can get complicated because every state defines things their own way but generally there are different legal requirements and rights for cities vs towns.

In North Carolina there is a "city" called Brevard with a population of just under 8,000 but you also have the "town" of Cary with population 170,000.

Of course there is still the issue of how the words are commonly used vs their actual legal definition but if you ask 100 different people the difference between a city and town, you'll get 100 slightly different definitions. Someone that grew up in New York City will have a very different definition than someone that grew up in Wyoming 50 miles from the nearest gas station. At the end of the day, there's just some vague notion that cities are bigger than towns.

Re: Why don’t more people live close to friends?

#372

Post by MrOwnPut »

BenFranklin100 wrote: post #14

Access to friends is probably the biggest reason I prefer dense urban environments. There’s something magical about being able to step out your door and be within a 10-20 minute walk of close friends or family. It invites casual get togethers like Saturday afternoon coffee or an after work drink. Living an hour or two apart kills these opportunities. I recall walking through Vienna one weeknight evening and being ama…

Or just live in a small town where all of your friends and needs are 5 minutes away.

I see no point to overpopulated cities with remote work so prevalent nowadays.

Cars aren't the problem, overpopulated cities are.

I can walk my town end to end in 15 minutes, there's a coop, grocery store, hospital, entertainment, etc. You can drive to another town if you want, or drive and park anywhere without paying, or walk, or bike. This is common for most small towns that I know of.

Re: Why don’t more people live close to friends?

#373

Post by soylentcola »

coldtea wrote: post #134
earthboundkid wrote: post #130

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Move to Baltimore, my friend. There are at least six bars within five blocks of my house. You’d have to get pretty sloshed to not be able to make the walk back.

Yeah, totally safe walking drunk in Baltimore at night...

When I was younger and went out drinking more often, I walked home from bars in Baltimore all the time. What the stats leave out is that (not getting into the deep politics of redlining and gentrification) the vast majority of violent crime just doesn't involve the pub districts and less neglected residential areas.

Yes, people will get mugged in the "nicer" neighborhoods once in a while. It's not something to discount or ignore. But when you hear about yet another gang shooting over the weekend, it's unlikely to be someone walking home from the bar in Hampden or Fells Point. It's in one of the neighborhoods that has seen disinvestment and poverty (and the resulting gang, drug trade, and violent activity) for generations.

On one hand I would love to not have to worry about the crime stats where I live. I don't want to avoid other people because I worry about getting mugged walking home at night. But I also hate the idea that everyone follows the same "move out as soon as you have kids/can afford it/get to a certain age" plan. It's like a constant, slow urban flight where people who are well-off enough to contribute to the city leave and only the poorest and least privileged residents remain.

I love that I can walk to so many places. When the city shut down due to a blizzard, I was fine not driving for a week or two. When it's nice out, I can walk 3 blocks to a massive park and see live music or a cultural festival. I can drive, but I can also bike or bus to work if my car is in the shop. Waterfront is walking distance. Shopping, restaurants, pubs, and galleries too. Oh, and my house cost under $200k (although I bought it a few years before the current price spike).

Re: Why don’t more people live close to friends?

#374

Post by pkphilip »

naremu wrote: post #25

I've been wondering how related these feelings of distance and isolation in the middle of society are to how the area is designed. I had always known for a long time the "why" I didn't want to go out on weekends and such, but it wasn't until I watched some of those videos from "Not Just Bikes" that it really, really struck me. I literally dread finding parking more than I enjoy finding friends. And suburban (and fran…

Part of the reason is also that people are now more mindful of "private" space and "personal" space than ever before and so they are not used to having people living close enough where they have to interact with them on a regular basis.

That was not the case earlier where people who were related lived fairly close to each other. This is particularly true in places like Asia, Africa and parts of Europe even today.

Staying close together requires adjustment and also requires people to value the close proximity of others.. This is sadly something which has largely disappeared particularly in North America

Re: Why don’t more people live close to friends?

#375

Post by rolisz »

anhner wrote: post #216
rolisz wrote: post #184

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I live in Romania, in a city that has been growing a lot. There's plenty of new development, both high density and single unit detached homes. Zoning is not that restrictive here, so it's actually people preferring to live in a separate home. So yeah, sprawl is nice.

And how much infrastructure (schools, kindergardens, medical centers, parks, postal offices, good public transport etc.) do you have around those new developments?

Pretty good infrastructure. Most of the new high rises are in the place of old factories that were built in the middle of the city, so they are in a good position, with access to good schools and everything, including public transportation.

If anything, single home units are on the edge of the city and usually don't have any public transportation, and yet people still build a lot there.

Re: Why don’t more people live close to friends?

#376

Post by khyryk »

balfirevic wrote: post #315
syndacks wrote: post #307

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The latter will cost you about 5-7million, the former, 5-700k.

I know that's how it currently is, but that's in large part due to limits on how many of those kinds of buildings are allowed to be built (and where).

One has to weigh the probability that (1) said limits are removed and (2) when they're removed, it makes a sufficient difference in prices against being permanently priced out. A house now, or a 5 million dollar apartment for 500k (both figures inflation adjusted) in 50 years? People wouldn't be foolish for going with the former if they're not rich.

Re: Why don’t more people live close to friends?

#377

Post by rolisz »

balfirevic wrote: post #292
iambateman wrote: post #85

Sprawl exists because it’s nice. People really like having a 3,000 square foot detached single family home with a 2 car garage. Especially when all of their friends have one. The only way everyone gets that, by definition, is sprawl. Of course, the drawbacks to personal health and well-being and societal stability are immense. But it’s really nice, too. Like, sitting in a massive basement with three TV’s while the gr…

> People really like having a 3,000 square foot detached single family home with a 2 car garage. Sure, I'd like that too. But also, how about 3000 square feet apartment with top-notch sound insulation and a balcony, with an underground garage? That sounds like it would have most of the benefits, I would actually prefer it, as I don't care about yards. And with 10-20 story buildings, you could still have quite a large…

I've yet to see an apartment with top-notch sound insulation.

Re: Why don’t more people live close to friends?

#378

Post by scarface74 »

dalmo3 wrote: post #267
scarface74 wrote: post #175

Earlier quoted context omitted.

My wife and I just moved from our 3200 square foot newly built (circa 2016) house last year and bought a 1300 square foot fully furnished condotel (units are owned individually in a resort condominium and they are rented out like hotels when we aren’t there and we get half the income). We paid about the same price that we paid for our house. In return, we pay one CDD fee that covers all utilities, minor maintenance a…

> 1300 square foot I have to say I'm envious of anyone that "downsizes" to a 120m² home.

My home before I moved was built for $335K and we bought it using an FHA loan with 3.5% down in north metro Atlanta in 2016. It was about the median price of a home back then. I was still in the recovery phase of my career (long story). We qualified for when I was making $135K. For reference, that’s less than a returning intern I mentored at BigTech got offered in 2021 (we work remotely).

Re: Why don’t more people live close to friends?

#379

Post by rebeccaskinner »

nsm wrote: post #200
rebeccaskinner wrote: post #183

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think "scared" is the wrong word for it. People in the US tend to have very low levels of contentiousness, and that in turn makes people want to avoid strangers. The most obvious recent example is the push back against masking. In a high population density urban setting, even a few people who aren't adhering to masking raises the general risk level for people substantially. In less population dense areas it doesn't…

Do you mean conscientiousness? Low contentiousness is nearly the opposite of what you are going for

Yep, thanks.
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