211–220 of 572 posts
I've been wondering how related these feelings of distance and isolation in the middle of society are to how the area is designed. I had always known for a long time the "why" I didn't want to go out on weekends and such, but it wasn't until I watched some of those videos from "Not Just Bikes" that it really, really struck me. I literally dread finding parking more than I enjoy finding friends. And suburban (and fran…
I've been wondering how related these feelings of distance and isolation in the middle of society are to how the area is designed. I had always known for a long time the "why" I didn't want to go out on weekends and such, but it wasn't until I watched some of those videos from "Not Just Bikes" that it really, really struck me. I literally dread finding parking more than I enjoy finding friends. And suburban (and fran…
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My personal theory is that suburban sprawl killed the "third place" in modern society. If you have to drive to a place to socialize (which probably involve drinking), then you're probably not going. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Third_place
My hypothesis is it's connected to the decline in religion, or, more specifically, the mandatory church on Sunday type of religion, no matter what flavor it took. A built in semi-mandatory third place seems pretty nifty as far as building social relationships goes. I'm an atheist but I do remember building bonds this way in those heady pre-smartphone days. It's a shame the baby is stuck in the bathwater.
Access to friends is probably the biggest reason I prefer dense urban environments. There’s something magical about being able to step out your door and be within a 10-20 minute walk of close friends or family. It invites casual get togethers like Saturday afternoon coffee or an after work drink. Living an hour or two apart kills these opportunities. I recall walking through Vienna one weeknight evening and being ama…
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> less superficially and more importantly, they would not be particularly honest or open or intimate with each other within the parameters of social norms This is more of a product of the time. My parents weren’t that open with close friends either back in the 70s when I was growing up. Fast forward to today and my friends are all quite open about personal things. And the one I know who is friends with his neighbor i…
This is probably a generational thing. I’m GenX. Growing up I never heard anyone talk about being depressed, having anxiety, etc. If someone today started trying to talk to me about mental health issues, I’d probably just have a deer in the headlights look since I have no clue how to respond to that sort of topic.
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> Sprawl exists because it’s nice. I think the vast swaths of single family homes have much more to do with restrictive single-family zoning rather than just because there's demand for it. In many areas, there is clearly demand for more high density housing as well, but often mixed use developments are not available under restrictive zoning laws. I hope someone more qualified than I could expand on how the FHA influe…
I live in Romania, in a city that has been growing a lot. There's plenty of new development, both high density and single unit detached homes. Zoning is not that restrictive here, so it's actually people preferring to live in a separate home. So yeah, sprawl is nice.
Access to friends is probably the biggest reason I prefer dense urban environments. There’s something magical about being able to step out your door and be within a 10-20 minute walk of close friends or family. It invites casual get togethers like Saturday afternoon coffee or an after work drink. Living an hour or two apart kills these opportunities. I recall walking through Vienna one weeknight evening and being ama…
When I was little all my friends were in a radius of 10 minutes walking time.
When I grew up but I was still living with my parents that expanded to about one hour walking or public transport, or bicycle, or car for the very few friends I had outside my city.
That didn't change when I moved to my own place. Most of my friends were between 40 and 60 minutes away. The closest ones, within 5 minutes, were new friends I met in places further away.
I live outside a city now and my friends are between 40 to 80 minutes away, by car.
The number of people I meet is about the same, some are new friends some are old ones.
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rare suburbanite HNer I bet that's pretty wrong.
I don’t think so. I’ve seen countless threads and front page articles about more bike-friendly, anti-car city development, as well as how suburban and rural cities requiring cars and more driving is definitely not a good thing. It’s very hard to find anyone coming to defense of the allure of smaller, more open developments with actual land between your neighbors. If you want to find rural or suburban folks, HN is not…
Re: anti-car people, one thing that is not acknowledged about America is that America is very large & people like having their own land. Public transportation is not a feasible option for mountain communities, low population density areas, & quiet areas with nature.
I was also attacked, though I got away, while riding my bike from BART in Hayward coming home from work. Havn't rode much public transportation since that experience. Public transportation is often in high crime areas.
Car accidents do happen, so there's danger there as well. I only had accidents in urban areas. Stressful conditions coupled with bad driving practices I suppose.
Access to friends is probably the biggest reason I prefer dense urban environments. There’s something magical about being able to step out your door and be within a 10-20 minute walk of close friends or family. It invites casual get togethers like Saturday afternoon coffee or an after work drink. Living an hour or two apart kills these opportunities. I recall walking through Vienna one weeknight evening and being ama…
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It's the same as people saying they need a car, they can't move because they bought a house, they don't have time because they have kids, they don't have money because their loan and alemony is taking everything.
They prioritized some things without thinking about the consequences. Or they didn't even prioritized, they just stumble upon it and went with it.
We have a group of friends in the city which for the last 10 years actively moved in the same district to stay close to each others.
This has a price as well.
But we decided on it, it didn't happen by mistake than 10 people rented, or even bought, in less a mile radius.
Some have children, some are around 50, some travel, some are poor... There is always something.
But they designed their life.