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Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

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Re: Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

#131
post #86

Earlier quoted context omitted.

OK delaying marriage and family is normal for all countries and all cultures, there's nothing to be done about it and it has nothing to do with Tinder let alone with OnlyFans lol, it's simply because age of maturity has increased due to higher impact of career and education. Of all things you said, i agree only with the "distortion of standards" thing. Again, it's global, has nothing to do with the U.S. or "West" in…

> single parenthood is completely normalised How? Would the government pay for surrogates for single men? Unless by "single parenthood" you actually just mean "single motherhood", which hardly seems like the way to run a gender equal society.

Forget gender equal society, question now is about having some next generation at all. This Tinder-inequality thing means another deep reduction in birth rate. We need to get birthrate fixed before thinking of equality etc. issues

Re: Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

#132
post #5

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Not a comfortable thing to say, but this is one reason I’m glad my kid is a daughter and not a son If the dating game is already like this now, it’s scary thinking about how it’ll be 18 years from now

If you think the situation is any better for young women, you're in for a shock. From where I'm sitting, the propaganda targeting women is far, far more pervasive and destructive. Everything about their relationships - the why, when, who and how - is undermined in an alarming majority of our institutions. Date many and often with no inhibitions, "have fun", don't get "tied down", delay marriage and family or abstain…

I have to agree with this now as a parent of a little girl myself and as non-liberal as it sounds.

Human values seem to have completely gone down the drain. Bravery, courage, chivalry and respect of elders. That marriage is a commitment and not to be taken lightly, and not to abandon your wife and kids.

Almost every day a new Twitter video comes out of dysfunctional children beating up on an elder for taking their toys away while cowardly students sit back and just watch.

Meanwhile women are being told that wanting to have kids and be a mother is just not enough or not desirable anymore. How can we think we are a modern society when women are the ones left raising children on their own when their partners leave them, or are the ones forced to “abort” children when they are put in a difficult position.

Maybe it is time to look at becoming Amish..

Re: Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

#133

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> but in other ways more regressive/toxic That's a bit unclear. Would you be ok to expand on that? :)

Not OP but am half Mexican with many Latin family members. A big trend right now in Latin America is 'quiero toxico/a'(I want a toxic(person)) , they paste it all over their vehicles, clothing and whatnot. You will see women wearing shirts that say 'soy toxica'(I'm toxic). They literally want someone who hits them, gets jealous, all the bad stereotypes. Having lived that myself, I firmly believe it's because they hav…

Heh Heh Heh, seems like a weird trend.

Wonder what's led to that, and how that'll work out over time...? :)

Re: Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

#134
post #5

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Not a comfortable thing to say, but this is one reason I’m glad my kid is a daughter and not a son If the dating game is already like this now, it’s scary thinking about how it’ll be 18 years from now

Take it from a serial dater male with great success on tinder/bumble.. the lives of many women is substantially worse than even guys that can't get a date. Unless you do a great job explaining the purpose of dating (courting?), There is a very high chance she'll simply become the temporary play thing of dozens of men. And being smart and well educated seems to have basically little to do with it.. I know many more ma…

Frightening to think of as a parent

Re: Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

#135

Throwaway. I’m looking for advice. I live in a decently big city, I make very good money - close to 200k which is far above what most people here pull in. Lead teams of people. Am in mid 30s, well over 6ft. White. My (few) sexual partners couldn’t get enough. I work out with a generous physique, get compliments that I can’t even accept these days. I’m extremely jaded. I stopped talking/interacting and even making eye…

Honestly, probably not the answer you’re looking for, but finding faith and belief in a higher power.

Re: Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

#136

Earlier quoted context omitted.

No it's not, it might be acceptable in a few societies but in a vast majority of societies across the globe sex work is both frowned upon and illegal. You are naive if you think all prostitutes are willing participants that chose this as a career. Across the world forced prostitution/sex work is fuelled by human trafficking of women and minors. In an ideal world human beings should be free to make their own choices b…

Simultaneously, it takes some balls (sic) to claim that sex work in all countries is definitely the result of human trafficking (etc). How about: "In some countries, sex work seems to be illegal and problematic. But in other countries, it's regulated and successful.".

Wait I thought “ It's only controversial in the US”.

Now, it is “some countries”?

Re: Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

#137

Earlier quoted context omitted.

First, realize that women are just people too and "ninety percent of everything is crap." If you do wish to marry and settle down, you need only ONE good woman and you need to NOT crap all over her the minute you meet her because of baggage. 1. Very beautiful women sometimes set up dating profiles with no photos or take other measures to attract men for reasons other than how photogenic they are. 2. Hobbies are a goo…

Hey Doreen - hope you’re doing better. 1. I haven’t done online dating at all. What I’ve seen in real life is hit and miss. I know too much of the corporate world. Marital affairs, sleeping for promotions, sex parties with upper management/C-levels, you name it. 2. I have hobbies in the arts where I excel, am recognized, and there are lots of women. 3. My closest friends are hardcore players which doesn’t help. While…

Find a good therapist. They can help you with this. And get new friends, people who treat other people well.

Re: Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

#138

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> but in other ways more regressive/toxic That's a bit unclear. Would you be ok to expand on that? :)

Not OP but am half Mexican with many Latin family members. A big trend right now in Latin America is 'quiero toxico/a'(I want a toxic(person)) , they paste it all over their vehicles, clothing and whatnot. You will see women wearing shirts that say 'soy toxica'(I'm toxic). They literally want someone who hits them, gets jealous, all the bad stereotypes. Having lived that myself, I firmly believe it's because they hav…

That's a strange trend to be mainstreamed, but not a strange sentiment at all, at least among women I've met. Most like to be spanked, manhandled, choked and dominated. One begged me to beat her up (I didn't).

I've known many men who like "crazy" women too. She stabbed him with a butcher knife? Forever in love.

Re: Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

#139

Throwaway. I’m looking for advice. I live in a decently big city, I make very good money - close to 200k which is far above what most people here pull in. Lead teams of people. Am in mid 30s, well over 6ft. White. My (few) sexual partners couldn’t get enough. I work out with a generous physique, get compliments that I can’t even accept these days. I’m extremely jaded. I stopped talking/interacting and even making eye…

You sound very in your own head about this. I wonder if things you’ve read online from HN/Reddit are coloring your perception of your in-person interactions.

I encourage you to stop homogenizing 50% of the population because of some general statistical shift. Even if on average what you say is true (I’m not convinced but just taking it as a given for the sake of argument), it’s not true for every individual you meet. You don’t need to blindly trust every woman you meet, but give them a chance to show you whether they’re a “viper” or not without pre-judgement.

Re: Why the rate of single men in the US looking for dates has declined

#140
post #9
post #7

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Not a comfortable thing to say, but this is one reason I’m glad my kid is a daughter and not a son I am missing something here... why? If the rate of single men in the US looking for a date has dropped, wouldn't a similar number (assuming majority straight relationships and monogamous pairings) of women be also single?

No, men aren’t looking for dates cause online dating has made it really brutal for them and allowed women to be more choosy It’s not by choice

Nah, it's by choice for many of us. I have no problem getting sex or charming women, and throughout my 20s had a bunch of fun with many women. I just don't care to do it anymore. I would rather spend my time learning and building than socializing, stressing, and dressing. Mostly I put this down to getting older, but a big part is just coming to terms with myself and how that differs from societal expectations. I've become comfortable in my own skin, so no longer seek validation of my manhood through sex and friends and money.
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