> I think you are asking me a very emotionally charged and complex question, that I can't really answer over the internet.
The internet is the only place I can ask this question. I can't ask this to my gf or friends. Anyway thank you for your answer.
> When men say they want a "gamer"/"nerd"/"etc, I assume they also mean "x" and cute.
Yeah, your answer is satisfactory, I'll just touch briefly on this topic. There are differences in what you're referring to here. Male attraction is truly uni-dimensional. A woman who has a nice average personality and works at the grocery store as a clerk but is very attractive and cute is infinitely better than a high paid female lawyer who is also a gamer/nerd/etc and has a great personality but is only average looking at best. The key here is physical attraction, that is the only dimension where the grocery store clerk beats the lawyer and really the only dimension that matters to a man. I do not believe women share the same overtly narrow preference.
So when a woman says she wants a sensitive man, I think she does place some importance in it, more so then a man would when he says he wants a "gamer" girl.
I suspect some of the confusion arises from the fact that even though women are more multi-dimensional in their attraction preferences then men it does not mean they place less emphasis on physical attraction. No, women are so selective that many women often set a bar higher then men for physical attractiveness despite the more multi-dimensional nature of their attraction pallet.
This is also an aspect of what I'm talking about. The scenario with the grocery store clerk is obvious to men, but I've often encountered women who simply don't get it. The concept was so foreign that they attempted to dispute with me what is in general just completely obvious to most men. Meanwhile, men more or less completely understand the complexity of female attraction preferences. Men all know about height, success, confidence and looks and how those are important to women and we're very clear about how these are different from what men want.
It's one of the things my mentor was referring to when he said that men understand women better then women understand men.