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Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

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Re: Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

#701

Post by bryanlarsen »

WarOnPrivacy wrote: post #504
tasuki wrote: post #447

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> remove school, college and work and what is left? Not much. What is left? Literally every other social activity one engages in?

> What is left? Literally every other social activity one engages in? This implies one has energy and resources for social activities. A big chunk of the US is broke and/or exhausted at the end of the week.

The other suggested alternative (religion) generally requires a far higher time + money commitment than many hobbies, yet has thrived for millennia.

Re: Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

#702

Post by VincentEvans »

VincentEvans wrote: post #294

I think you lot should get off apps and approach women the old-fashioned way. I am ok looking guy and have not encountered any problems meeting women my entire life. But one thing I can say that my experience with that is entirely IRL so to speak, I’ve never bothered with apps, never even downloaded one. I have freckles, speak with an accent, and not at all athletic (though not what one might call fat either). I driv…

And one more thing. You should also know that some people who look really great in pictures - become impossible to be around and quite unlikable because of how they behave and what they say.

Re: Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

#703

Post by seydor »

pcbro141 wrote: post #152

I think women naturally just aren't into men as much as men are into women (in general, at a group level). They're also more likely to choose to be alone than be with someone who doesn't meet their standards. So any society where they "don't need a man" (no financial/cultural/patriarchy pressure) is going to have the same large incel issue over time.

> They're also more likely to choose to be alone than be with someone who doesn't meet their standards.

But they are not, as the article says women do have sexual partners while men increasingly don't. Men are hugely unmatched in loneliness in the young age groups

https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/wp-content/uploads...

Re: Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

#704

Post by kragen »

antisthenes wrote: post #664
kragen wrote: post #585

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Mostly 25–60? I mostly only notice the attraction state of the ones I see as desirable partners, though I've dated a few that turned out to be a very poor fit.

You do realize that aggregating women into the 25-60 range pretty much turns your data from anecdotal to outright useless? 25-35 range is vastly different from the 50-60 range, for quite obvious reasons.

There are lots and lots of vast differences among the different women who have been attracted to me over the years; age is just one of them, while others include national origin, educational attainment, socio-economic class, country of residence, pluriparity, conscientiousness, openness to experience, agreeability, extraversion, agreeableness, neuroticism, autism, height, weight, sexual orientation, political party alignment, favorite operating system, hair color, skin color, and religion.

What's so special about their age to you?

I don't think I have a sample size large enough to confidently discriminate among particular age groups' attraction to me. I'm not, like, a celebrity or something. Even if I did, I don't see how such a sample could avoid being far too biased to draw any useful conclusions from.

Re: Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

#706

Post by seydor »

tru3_power wrote: post #31

Does anyone think this a lot of this is hormone driven? I know there are studies that show sperm counts are dropping due to chemicals, but I haven’t been able to find anything regarding testosterone levels. I’m not arguing that having higher testosterone will make women more attracted to men, but having higher testosterone undoubtedly gives you more energy/confidence to succeed in life (which probably makes you more…

no , unless you mean that increasing testosterone will make men oppress women again so they can have more equitable distribution among themselves.

"This" is the result of max level sexual competition. If anything, if it were hormonal it would affect disproportionally more the high-partner-count males compared to low-partner, which would flatten the distribution

Re: Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

#707

Post by kragen »

astrange wrote: post #689
kragen wrote: post #404

Earlier quoted context omitted.

A weird thing about this is that I think I've had more sex, and met more new partners, in periods when I was unemployed or underemployed. When I've been really poor I've been depressed, which cuts my chances of meeting a new partner to about zero. But when I've been extremely employed I think I haven't had the time or emotional bandwidth for intimate relationships. Or travel: travelers get an automatic +4 bonus to se…

In Asia (very vaguely speaking…) it's comparatively more common to meet people exclusively outside the home whether you're friends, dates, or even early into a committed relationship. It's entirely possible you'll never see inside someone's house, though "home dates"/"home parties" are a thing. That's probably an effect of small apartments and lots of restaurants.

What are the popular gathering spots other than restaurants?

Re: Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

#708

Post by seydor »

LorenPechtel wrote: post #633
aatd86 wrote: post #282

I don't understand why having mastery over one's own conditioning is not put forward. Sex is not necessary for health. That's weird. This is just an ingrained behavior to ensure reproduction via neurotransmitter feedback (dopamine). One should be able to trivially control that consciously, no big deal.

A lack of sex and a lack of romantic relationships both have substantial negative correlations with health.

I always wondered if this commonly quoted fact is the wrong way of causation. Men who are more healthy are more likely to seek more love sounds more logical.

It also seems that men who have a lot of sex have a lot of STDs. I would like to see the statistics

Re: Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

#709

Post by seydor »

f-securus wrote: post #5

Legalize prostitution and regulate safety and perhaps incels would build confidence and learn to socialize a bit from paid sexual interactions? I'm kind of ignorant to the subject of what is the cause of 'sexual loneliness' but I believe the world's oldest profession shouldn't be pushed into the shadows as that causes more problems than it prevents.

same things are happening in countries with legal prostitution

Re: Sexual loneliness: A neglected public health problem?

#710

Post by seydor »

Beaver117 wrote: post #467

Can we talk about making prostitution legal? Other countries have realized their sexual loneliness problem and made it legal, which somewhat helped. When men have some access to sex, it improves outcomes for everyone.

which country did that and what problem did it solve? The same pattern of loneliness is found in countries with legalized prostitution
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