More pay, more wfh, better working conditions. I just shoot the shit if all of all of those are good.
Ask HN: What do you talk about in 1-on-1s with your managers?
91–100 of 287 posts
Re: Ask HN: What do you talk about in 1-on-1s with your managers?
#92Earlier quoted context omitted.
"They only serve to make a manager feel like they know what everyone is doing, all the time." As a manager it is critically important that I have a sense of what my staff is doing. New assignments come in all the time that require quick turnaround. I need to know who on my staff is available for such projects.
You should be able to know this through a defined engineering process, and the signals that this process produces (standups, ticket progress, etc). Regularly interrupting people to get status updates is not the way to do it.
1. I am not an engineer and this is not an engineering firm.
2. Why would 1:1 be a waste of time, but a standup isn't?
3. I am not "regularly interrupting people," this is a regularly scheduled 1:1. Why is that an interruption, but a standup isn't?
Re: Ask HN: What do you talk about in 1-on-1s with your managers?
#93I tend to avoid focusing on status updates on my WIP. In my 1:1s, I want to talk about me. 1. What do I need to do to get my next promotion/payrise, or how do I get onto the next bit of interesting work? Even if I'm happy with my current work and compensation, I use this as an opportunity to constantly make clear what my personal objectives are. 2. How well am I tracking against Q1? 3. How do you suggest I improve on…
I actually searched the page to see if anyone else is mentioning "managing up". Yes, I use my 1:1 for that as well.
Remember: your manager works for you, their job is to enable you.
Re: Ask HN: What do you talk about in 1-on-1s with your managers?
#94It's okay to skip 1:1s if there's nothing to talk about. I think it's more important to have a standing meeting were both parties know they can bring up "serious things" than to use every standing meeting to its fullest.
As to what I talk about during my 1:1s, if it's not just bullshitting with my manager and building rapport, it's usually "this thing is hurting me/our team. What can we do about that?" Or "I feel like I'm kicking ass. How can we raise my awareness to the org?"
Basic questions that I would like a sync answer to and to give space for any conversations that need to happen.
Re: Ask HN: What do you talk about in 1-on-1s with your managers?
#951:1s at staff/senior level have always been about annealing the TODO graph to optimise for delivery. Who do I need to do what. Who needs to talk to me. Who can my manager talk to on my behalf to get X done so that Y can unblock Z. It’s a weekly check in where we passively infer project status by actively discussing ephemeral Gantt chart optimizations.
On top of that there’s how I’m feeling. And how I’m feeling about colleagues A, B and C. The best 1:1s for me have been when I feel like I’m helping my manager by giving him a heads up on things that would have otherwise surprised him, particularly about human/human interaction. In many ways, managing junior ICs must be bliss when the 1:1 is about the status of their isolated tasks. The real quagmire begins when you have relatively senior people trying to accomplish something together as a team, with your manager acting as the PM you were never assigned.
Also, some amount of ticket triage, for our sins.
Re: Ask HN: What do you talk about in 1-on-1s with your managers?
#96Mostly talk about pending organizational changes (since we've had 3 rounds of that over the last 12 months), or strategic initiatives our team should take. Of our team of 12, I'm the youngest but also the one with the most "rounded" experience, so he tends to ask my opinion a lot, which I appreciate.
Other than that, just the usual gripes about weather, travel disruption and useless project managers.
Re: Ask HN: What do you talk about in 1-on-1s with your managers?
#97I also believe that one week and 30mins are are not enough for 1-on-1s.
In my company, we do 1-on-1s once a month for 1 hour. The manager asks questions like:
- How are you? - What's the skill that you are trying to improve this month? - How I (the manager) or the company can help you to improve this skill? -Do you feel that your responsibilities in the company are common with your personal goals?
I think that these meetings are successful when there is a clear agenda and both sides are prepared.
Personally, I feel very happy with these meetings.
Re: Ask HN: What do you talk about in 1-on-1s with your managers?
#98I wish I could offer more on maximizing this time... However, I think I can help in another way. Don't feel bad about 'blowing your trumpet' or complaining; that's exactly the time to do it! My manager and I skip our 1:1s more often than we have them, and when we do, it's usually just a hang-out session. We meet once every two weeks, and most of the time is just talking about random things we found neat. However , th…
I’m quite senior so I do the same. We meet every two weeks but about half the time cancel because there’s really nothing to talk about. I’ve made it clear that I’m happy with my current level and don’t want to “progress” to another level where I’m a professional meeting attender. So there’s not much to talk about- I’m fairly happy and my long term goal is to retire in my 40s and work at a fairly chill place until then.
When I do have an actual topic it’s to ask about company politics- I need X, who can make that happen - or something like when I wanted to transition to fully remote
Re: Ask HN: What do you talk about in 1-on-1s with your managers?
#991. Here's what I'm working on. (Is this a good use of my time?) 2. Here are my blockers. (Can you help clear the way so I can do my work?) 3. Here's what's going on in my life (relationship building, context for manager to understand your work and capacity)
I've seen this in a few places before. 1 and 2 should be daily/biweekly/weekly check-ins either via a stand up or by a message/email, they do not warrant a 1-on-1 and wastes people's time to make managers feel better. 3 seems like it could be abused by a manager and feels a little forced by the sounds of it. Does the manager share equally about their availability to act accordingly?
#3 can work. My last two managers were decent people with interesting stuff they did outside of work.
I've enjoyed sharing some war stories in my experience volunteering at various places.
I'll totally talk for hours about any number of topics.
I've also done what's probably "life coaching". There are a lot of things I've learned managing a mental illness. Not a therapist, but I know a lot of the techniques and what's worked for me or other people.
Re: Ask HN: What do you talk about in 1-on-1s with your managers?
#100Earlier quoted context omitted.
You should be able to know this through a defined engineering process, and the signals that this process produces (standups, ticket progress, etc). Regularly interrupting people to get status updates is not the way to do it.
1. I am not an engineer and this is not an engineering firm. 2. Why would 1:1 be a waste of time, but a standup isn't? 3. I am not "regularly interrupting people," this is a regularly scheduled 1:1. Why is that an interruption, but a standup isn't?
Sorry, I assumed that you were part of tech. I only know about good processes for software development.