Ask HN: I'm in a rut. How did you get out of yours?

> And this is coming from someone who got into computer science _because_ of video games.

Consider that you may not be the same person anymore and that different things are important to you now.

At the risk of losing precious karmas, try listening to Jordan Peterson. He's helped a lot of people in similar situations.

Replace the computer science degree with general IT tech support/engineering. Add a little "not diagnosed with ADHD until my mid 20's", "depression and anxiety due to living with undiagnosed ADHD and in general bad living situation" - and you've got me. (Surprise, I'm browsing and writing this response while I'm at work!)

I've been a heavy marijuana user for 4-5 years - used to be I'd smoke a bit before bed to take some of my anxiety away - which over the course of a few months evolved into any waking hour I wasn't working or had social/personal obligations, I'd be stoned. Now it's 2-3 years later and I'm still in the same boat and I'm trying to quit. I've even """upgraded""" to vaping the oil extracts in 510 carts because the relatively weaker flower doesn't work for me much anymore. Marijuana is definitely addictive and definitely has the ability to mess with/manipulate your brain and cause problems if you're a addictive personality/habit type of person. I've tried multiple times to take tolerance breaks but find myself going back after a couple of days so it's very demoralizing - hopefully I'll finally break the habit. I find I get stoned and get couch-locked into a video game for multiple hours at a time and it's causing me to stay up later, not get as much sleep, not get things done that I want to get done, etc.

If you think the marijuana might be affecting your cognitive abilities in the day-to-day I'd suggest looking at taking a tolerance break (_WAY_ easier said than done).

I've also been seeing a psychiatrist to help me with the knock-on effects of my ADHD - depression, anxiety, etc - and they've recommended I keep a journal that I can write in whenever I want, how much I want to write, etc. - I've found it very freeing to physically write compared to typing as I feel my brain doesn't 'slow down' enough to mentally comprehend the stuff I'm typing as compared to writing.

I haven't made an entry in 2-3 weeks but there's been times where I've written 2-3 pages 5 days in a row. I use it as something to get the anxious, persistent thoughts out of my head that won't go away. With ADHD - it's VERY important to not get stuck in the "I should be writing in my journal, I'm such a useless person, I can't even write in my journal every day what an idiot I must be" way of thinking" is a bad line of thought you can go down and with therapy tools like CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) can help by "re-wiring"/subconsciously training away those bad thought patterns or giving you the tools to recognize them and re-orient yourself to a better way of thinking. It's very hard but it's possible.

There's also the option of taking pharmaceuticals as a helper while you're addressing this point in your life if you feel like you've got depression or anxiety problems - I've been taking an amphetamine and an anti-depressant for the past 6-7 years - I've got my own personal niggling about how I've probably been taking these drugs for far too long and it's possible they've permanently re-wired my brain for the worse but it's something you'd definitely want to talk to a healthcare professional about. (honestly, the marijuana might be doing more damage than the pharmaceuticals but who knows)

I don't know if there's private messaging on this forum, but if there is feel free to reach out and I'll try to respond if you've got any questions or just want to chat.

A great thing with it is that you can just basically force yourself to do it, and still reap the rewards.

I find it's much easier to procrastinate when I don't feel like working. But if I just push myself to go out for a walk or lift some weights, once I get going I'll usually see it through and feel much better afterwards. It doesn't even have to be much, just a few rounds of pushups and squats (without weights) is enough to get the blood flowing and get my spirits back up. There's something about feeling your body working that's very mentally relaxing.

Bonus points for this having an effect on my food cravings, which I've seen have an effect on mood. I think there was a related thread on HN recently, but I can't seem to find it.

Humans need love like we need food. Being terminally alone sucks.