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On Aging Alone (2021)

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Re: On Aging Alone (2021)

#61

Post by Aeolun »

supernova87a wrote: post #4

These are the life choices we make, whether through biology, mentality, or environment. For me, one of the key factors is that the signal-to-noise you have to endure with friends to get the few moments of gratification is so low that it's draining. Maybe it's a product of having a high bar for what constitutes new and interesting/entertaining for me (compared against spending time alone), combined with already being…

It’s kinda curious. I connect to people over ideas, but my family also happens to be the group of people that is similarly inclined enough to connect over ideas with.

I left my home to go live overseas, but even after 8 years abroad I haven’t found people I connect with in the same way.

Re: On Aging Alone (2021)

#62

Post by postalrat »

throwawayboise wrote: post #55
kromem wrote: post #50

AI companionships for the elderly is going to be a beyond massive market by the time we're all old. Sometimes we just need people to listen, and in that AI will exceed most humans, who are generally just waiting for their chance to have someone else listen to them. I'm starting to see the initial beginnings of that market, and already the reviews are eye opening. People gushing over how much of a difference a text-ch…

I disagree. Maybe because I've worked with computers for my entire career. The last thing I want to do when I'm old is interact with technology. I'd much rather have a dog.

You are interacting with users here. What if we were all bots?

Re: On Aging Alone (2021)

#63

Post by openknot »

RichardHeart wrote: post #8

Go to gym. Do an activity with other people. Be kind. Lot's of other people would die to have your attention. Symbiosis.

For guys, martial arts is a pretty good activity for creating relationships with others.

The downsides are that it can be expensive for membership fees, take a lot of commitment and time, and also be a competitive, high-pressure environment. Each of these can be mitigated to some extent, but it takes effort and independent thinking (especially when resisting the social pressures to be competitive).

Other activities can include: rock climbing (though no personal experience), board games including chess (I heard lots of good anecdotal experiences with this), Dungeons and Dragons (minority opinion, but this can be tough to commit to due to the required time, often ~4 hours per week), other physical sports (e.g. pickup basketball if you have a skill at it), and volunteering. Book clubs can also be good places to meet others and have discussions.

Committee activities can also be a good place to meet others. I suspect that many older adults join committees such as homeowner associations or parent-teacher associations, partially to meet other people and socialize. Outside of these, there are committees at smaller, local non-profits where people can also meet and socialize with others, while working toward a goal.

Re: On Aging Alone (2021)

#64

Post by mjcohen »

For me, the main positive of the shutdown is a massive increase in the amount of improv I can do. I can easily take 3 improv classes via Zoom per week. Each class has a number of people which has remained fairly constant over the last year or two, forming a fairly cohesive mini-community. This applies also to jams.

Here's an example. I live in Los Angeles. Through FaceBook, I found a bi-weekly improvised rap jam that is led by a doctor in Belfast. Very enjoyable and completely impossible without Zoom.

I have also taken classes from world-famous teachers that I could have never otherwise met, as well as classes from Tucson, Las Vegas, Chicago, New York, Florida, and London.

Doing this, alone is not alone.

Re: On Aging Alone (2021)

#65

Post by throwawayboise »

postalrat wrote: post #62
throwawayboise wrote: post #55

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I disagree. Maybe because I've worked with computers for my entire career. The last thing I want to do when I'm old is interact with technology. I'd much rather have a dog.

You are interacting with users here. What if we were all bots?

I won't be here when I retire.

Re: On Aging Alone (2021)

#66

Post by quickthrower2 »

cm2012 wrote: post #57
kromem wrote: post #50

AI companionships for the elderly is going to be a beyond massive market by the time we're all old. Sometimes we just need people to listen, and in that AI will exceed most humans, who are generally just waiting for their chance to have someone else listen to them. I'm starting to see the initial beginnings of that market, and already the reviews are eye opening. People gushing over how much of a difference a text-ch…

People are skeptical of this but the new AI conversation capabilities are just so good these days and will only get better. At some point it really will be like a supportive friend (albeit with limitations)

A supportive friend that is selling your data via Zuck and co.

Re: On Aging Alone (2021)

#67

Post by vinceguidry »

openknot wrote: post #58
vinceguidry wrote: post #31

I have always had a tough time applying the tool of reason to the problem of loneliness. In a way, I don't feel like I've ever been lonely. Not that I have never felt the same way that people who do describe themselves as lonely feel. I have and still often do. The 'problem' is that I've always been able to isolate the reason I'm feeling that way and administer some kind of intervention. And I know, that getting olde…

>"Is my soul yearning for spiritual connection? I've got a good friend for that. My libido looking for an exhilarating one? There's bars and the ubiquitous 'more-than-friend-but-not-quite-committed' friendship we all seem to have but never seem to really look to for that sort of thing. The least lonely person I know is in his late 70s. He's always talking to someone whenever I see him." Academic research may be a goo…

> I never once had a "'more-than-friend-but-not-quite-committed' friendship."

Did you really never have ongoing romantic tension with someone you interacted with regularly? It seems rather inevitable for young people to find themselves in one of these. Even the loneliest people I know have mustered up some kind of tension with someone, even if they were never able to act on it.

Re: On Aging Alone (2021)

#68

Post by m463 »

kromem wrote: post #50

AI companionships for the elderly is going to be a beyond massive market by the time we're all old. Sometimes we just need people to listen, and in that AI will exceed most humans, who are generally just waiting for their chance to have someone else listen to them. I'm starting to see the initial beginnings of that market, and already the reviews are eye opening. People gushing over how much of a difference a text-ch…

I think it will be video games or their descendants.

Re: On Aging Alone (2021)

#69

Post by Gigachad »

supernova87a wrote: post #4

These are the life choices we make, whether through biology, mentality, or environment. For me, one of the key factors is that the signal-to-noise you have to endure with friends to get the few moments of gratification is so low that it's draining. Maybe it's a product of having a high bar for what constitutes new and interesting/entertaining for me (compared against spending time alone), combined with already being…

Listen to yourself. When you start talking about the signal to noise ratio and calculating the return on investment of social interactions, its time to step away from the keyboard and reevaluate your life.

Your brain has been fried by hustle culture.

Re: On Aging Alone (2021)

#70

Post by nowherebeen »

m463 wrote: post #68
kromem wrote: post #50

AI companionships for the elderly is going to be a beyond massive market by the time we're all old. Sometimes we just need people to listen, and in that AI will exceed most humans, who are generally just waiting for their chance to have someone else listen to them. I'm starting to see the initial beginnings of that market, and already the reviews are eye opening. People gushing over how much of a difference a text-ch…

I think it will be video games or their descendants.

Lots of my friends have been talking about it for years. Gaming is going to be nuts by the time we are 70 and it's going to be multiplayer as well. Keeping our brains active will be key to keeping us functioning.
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