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Taking a break from social media makes you happier and less anxious

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Re: Taking a break from social media makes you happier and less anxious

#411

Post by cortesoft »

eafkuor wrote: post #181
id wrote: post #168

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If other people find their ideal job, have a tropical vacation, etc. it makes me feel... good? Those are good things in general, although the tropical vacation might make me also feel concerned about the climate. The problems I have with social media are that - it steals a lot of time - a lot of content gets me by evoking negative emotion - it's taxing to get exposed to so many different ideas, clips, heated discussi…

> If other people find their ideal job, have a tropical vacation, etc. it makes me feel... good? Those are good things in general, although the tropical vacation might make me also feel concerned about the climate. If this would be your genuine reaction, congratulations. You belong to the 0.001% of the population that would feel this way.

Are you sure it is that rare? I find it shocking that most people don't feel joy when the people they care about are happy. My assumption is that depressed people would feel worse, but people who are generally happy themselves would feel happy when someone else is feeling happy.

Where do you get your assumption that only 1 in 100,000 people are happy for others? The fact that there are at least two people who feel this way commenting in this chat seems to imply your numbers are off. I don't think the percentage of depressed people in the world is that high.

Re: Taking a break from social media makes you happier and less anxious

#413

Post by cortesoft »

antiframe wrote: post #391
id wrote: post #368

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's not a misunderstanding. I'm also happy for complete strangers. Jeff Bezos is enjoying his Amazon money? Great for him. Also, I can't relate to feelings of shame or inadequacy because someone has something good happening to them. If anything, it motivates me to achieve the same.

> Also, I can't relate to feelings of shame or inadequacy because someone has something good happening to them. If anything, it motivates me to achieve the same. Those two aspects feel like they are opposing one another. On the one hand, you claim to never feel inadequate, yet when you see others achieving something you haven't yet achieved you claim it motivates you to achieve the same. How is it that you feel adequ…

> On the one hand, you claim to never feel inadequate, yet when you see others achieving something you haven't yet achieved you claim it motivates you to achieve the same

That doesn't mean you are feeling inadequate. Being inspired doesn't mean you feel bad about yourself.

For example, whenever I watch really good basketball, it makes me want to go out and play myself. When I see someone playing a fun video game, it makes me want to play. I don't feel inadequate, I just want to participate in the fun and challenge.

Re: Taking a break from social media makes you happier and less anxious

#414

Post by antiframe »

Clubber wrote: post #352
cush wrote: post #133

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's much worse than tobacco. At least tobacco only kills people when they're older, whereas social media robs young people of their mental health while simultaneously threatening truth and democracy

>while simultaneously threatening ... democracy This seems to be the latest topic from the outrage machine. Can you explain how social media is an actual threat to the democracy or democratic process to a reasonable person?

> Can you explain how social media is an actual threat to the democracy or democratic process to a reasonable person?

The best explanation I've read of this is Tim Urban's "The Story of Us" series [1]. It builds up a model from individual behavior to societal behavior and how it's changed over the decades due to how online interactions have shifted behavior (both individual and societal).

I don't know whether it's the right or wrong model and explanation, but he lays it out very clearly.

[1]: https://waitbutwhy.com/2019/08/story-of-us.html

Re: Taking a break from social media makes you happier and less anxious

#415

Post by cortesoft »

weatherlite wrote: post #279
id wrote: post #168

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If other people find their ideal job, have a tropical vacation, etc. it makes me feel... good? Those are good things in general, although the tropical vacation might make me also feel concerned about the climate. The problems I have with social media are that - it steals a lot of time - a lot of content gets me by evoking negative emotion - it's taxing to get exposed to so many different ideas, clips, heated discussi…

Thought experiment - let's say you are the poorest person in your neighborhood. Would talking to your neighbors daily about their salaries really make you feel better? I mean them having money, even if more than you is a good thing according to you what you said.

Sure, but there is only one person in the neighborhood that is the poorest. Most people are going to be around the average, so they aren't going to have the experience of everyone being richer than them.

Re: Taking a break from social media makes you happier and less anxious

#416

Post by tappio »

ss2003 wrote: post #325
tappio wrote: post #270

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I feel content with my life and I'm genuinely happy when my friends accomplish something. I can't remember when I was seriously envious last time. Sometimes, there may be a moment when I feel slight envy, but then I realize that they decided to put effort into that, and I put my effort into something else. Time is limited. Everyone has problems; ups and downs. I've mostly quit social media because the majority of act…

Hacker News is social media

I agree. I actually pointed out in another comment that the term social media does not make any sense. Everyone has a different definition of social media. We can't really generalize findings on all platforms. The studies focusing on social media are often missing that it does not really make any sense to use that word. Are Twitter and Facebook the same? Can we generalize findings on one to another? No we can't. Talking about "social media" this way does not make much sense. It also hides out the fact that in the end everything is about the internet and digital content, together forming the new mass medium which is actually the relevant unifying factor. I'm glad you picked that up!

Re: Taking a break from social media makes you happier and less anxious

#417

Post by sharadov »

charstacker wrote: post #149

Consider the following scenario: You're pleased and content one minute, thinking your life is going fine the next. You have a few minutes to kill, so you log onto Facebook and begin scrolling... First, you notice a friend's post stating that she has accepted her ideal job. Then you read a coworker's too political rant. You continue browsing and see a video of your neighbour enjoying a fantastic tropical vacation. And…

No, it does not bother me. I am one of those people who feels happy when something good is happening in other people's lives.

That other person who got that job put time into it and achieved it. Good for them.

Someone lost a shit ton of weight and looks ripped. That's motivation for me to lift too and eat better.

It comes down to you, are you using that as fuel to motivate you or are you seething inside and burning with envy?

I honestly believe that envy is the thief of joy and if you allow it to consume you it will destroy you.

The only people that turn me off are those folks who make political shit posts, but I don't follow them.

Re: Taking a break from social media makes you happier and less anxious

#418

Post by cortesoft »

coldtea wrote: post #337
id wrote: post #234

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You can compare yourself and enjoy the success of someone else.

In limited capacity, in regular life, yes. In social media, the constant highlights of the successes of other people makes you miserable for yourself, whether you feel happy for others too or not. Besides an experience many can verify, it's also quite well studied, including in the linked article.

> In social media, the constant highlights of the successes of other people makes you miserable for yourself

That might be how it makes you (and others) feel, but that doesn't mean everyone feels that way. There are people on this thread trying to say that it doesn't make them feel that way, but they keep being dismissed. The studies don't say EVERYONE feels that way, so to act like they are WRONG about how they feel is overly dismissive.

Re: Taking a break from social media makes you happier and less anxious

#419

Post by sharadov »

ac2022 wrote: post #408
id wrote: post #168

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If other people find their ideal job, have a tropical vacation, etc. it makes me feel... good? Those are good things in general, although the tropical vacation might make me also feel concerned about the climate. The problems I have with social media are that - it steals a lot of time - a lot of content gets me by evoking negative emotion - it's taxing to get exposed to so many different ideas, clips, heated discussi…

I think this depends on persons internal happiness. Happy people feel happier and sad people get sadder. This is based on my own experiences. In my 20s, I was as happy as one can be. I posted a lot on social media and enjoyed posts of my friends. Loved food posts cause that gave me new resturants to try out. Vacation pictures, I couldn't afford a nice vacation but vacationed via those pictures. Asked friends to post…

You said it - your internal state is reflected when you look at social media.

Re: Taking a break from social media makes you happier and less anxious

#420

Post by antiframe »

cortesoft wrote: post #413
antiframe wrote: post #391

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Also, I can't relate to feelings of shame or inadequacy because someone has something good happening to them. If anything, it motivates me to achieve the same. Those two aspects feel like they are opposing one another. On the one hand, you claim to never feel inadequate, yet when you see others achieving something you haven't yet achieved you claim it motivates you to achieve the same. How is it that you feel adequ…

> On the one hand, you claim to never feel inadequate, yet when you see others achieving something you haven't yet achieved you claim it motivates you to achieve the same That doesn't mean you are feeling inadequate. Being inspired doesn't mean you feel bad about yourself. For example, whenever I watch really good basketball, it makes me want to go out and play myself. When I see someone playing a fun video game, it…

Maybe I'm using the word incorrectly then. There are two ways I can imagine feeling inadequate when seeing, for example, a post of someone on a Hawaiian vacation:

1. I have inadequate resources. I can never afford such fancy lodgings, etc. This is a pretty negative emotion.

2. I feel my vacationing has been inadequate. I should spend more time off with my loved ones. Where can I go in my time and dollar budget to better enjoy life?

I would call both feels one of being 'inadequate'. If I felt adequate, I would feel like I don't need any (more) vacations and not inspired to make any changes in my life.

At least that was my reading of id's comment that "If anything, it motivates me to achieve the same." Without any feeling of inadequacy, where does the motivation come from? Maybe I process these feelings differently than others, but for me without something to trigger the desire, I won't be motivated, and that trigger is in some sense something inadequate I want to improve about myself or my life.

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