Why do you waste so much time on the internet? • Hacker News Board

Re: Why do you waste so much time on the internet?

#681

Post by ajmurmann » Tue, May 10, 2022, 4:25 AM UTC

ryandrake wrote: post #389

organsnyder wrote: post #365

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The community of my church is probably keeping me there more than my faith is.

I'd probably be more into church if it was just a social club and didn't come with that expectation that you'd be worshiping an invisible sky daddy, adopting questionable morality/philosophies, and attending what's basically a Republican political rally every Sunday. My wife goes to hers and it's nice, socially for her, that it comes prepackaged with a ready-made group of friends, but as soon as the Bibles and Trump…

Agreed. There was an interesting post here recently that had this theory why churches work:

"Eventually, you pick a relatively relaxed “normal” religion, complete with all the “God” stuff. You don’t believe everything they say is literally true, but our reality is strange and inexplicable, so who knows? There’s a great stable community and you talk about the broader themes of life and you’re healthier and happier.

You secretly guess that the group is sustained by a minority of true believers who make up critical mass for a larger group of people like you, but you never talk about this and neither does anyone else. When you have kids, you feel weird about explaining your thoughts about all this to them, but you don’t parrot back what the religion says when you’re talking about the meaning of life either."

https://dynomight.net/plans/

Re: Why do you waste so much time on the internet?

#682

Post by foxtrottbravo » Tue, May 10, 2022, 5:59 PM UTC

ajmurmann wrote: post #666

foxtrottbravo wrote: post #625

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That‘s me but evermore so I‘m stuck between a rock and a hard place. As one sibling comment - I too have noticed this: I can remember friends of my parents showing by having a good time completely spontaneously. I liked it very much. On the other hand I’m one of those people who get irrationally upset by random visits especially when it’s from family. I guess that’s one reason why it’s so hard for me to be happy.

The getting upset part is interesting. I have some theories, but am curious to hear why you think it makes you upset.

I really find it hard to pinpoint the exact reason. In the moment the "surprise" is what feels overwhelming. I know it's paradox because on the other hand, that's what the interaction my parents and their friends had were - little surprises.

It feels a bit like wanting a surprise gift for Christmas (contrary to something you wished to get) but then being upset because you did not get what you wished for...

I would love, to hear your theories maybe this willhelp explore that feeling a bit more

Re: Why do you waste so much time on the internet?

#683

Post by duckmysick » Wed, May 11, 2022, 12:19 PM UTC

Crabber wrote: post #348

Invictus0 wrote: post #247

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Because we still need certain utilities on our phone, like Maps and Music and Search and Camera. Those aren't the problems--we still want those things, which are not addictive and fruitful, but we want less of things which are addictive and fruitless, like Twitter and Reddit. Cigarettes have no such essential and positive utility.

>Because we still need certain utilities on our phone You don't "need" any of those things, humans got on with life just fine without them for 100,000s of years, smartphones have only existed for the last 15. >Maps Look it up on a computer before you go, or ask someone on the street for directions. The only "benefit" having maps on a phone gives you is that you can completely avoid talking to people and just stare do…

> You don't "need" any of those things, humans got on with life just fine without them for 100,000s of years, smartphones have only existed for the last 15.

That's an odd thing to say. Humans got on with life just fine without electricity, central heating, public education, public transportation, computers, and the internet. I'm grateful I have access to them.

What's the cutoff for things that didn't exist for the majority of the humankind, but are good to have?

Re: Why do you waste so much time on the internet?

#684

Post by ajmurmann » Thu, May 12, 2022, 1:27 AM UTC

foxtrottbravo wrote: post #682

ajmurmann wrote: post #666

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The getting upset part is interesting. I have some theories, but am curious to hear why you think it makes you upset.

I really find it hard to pinpoint the exact reason. In the moment the "surprise" is what feels overwhelming. I know it's paradox because on the other hand, that's what the interaction my parents and their friends had were - little surprises. It feels a bit like wanting a surprise gift for Christmas (contrary to something you wished to get) but then being upset because you did not get what you wished for... I would lo…

My theory is that we have so much entertainment and so many low-importance chores and tasks we put on ourselves that any unplanned event feels negative. One might have planned to go shopping, watch the latest episode of a show, read an article or watch a video that one stumbled over earlier in the day or similar. There is just no more idle or unplanned time. In the rare case that time is unplanned, it feels precious, although we did this to ourselves.

I recently started to only allow myself to watch tv on Friday evenings. I've also made a much stronger effort to limit social media consumption. I feel a lot less stressed and I think it's because there suddenly is no default way of filling time. Not only do I spend more time on things I actually value (musical instrument practice, reading books and working on my software projects), but I also think that I am much more often in a state where I'd be delighted, rather than stressed if friends or family suddenly stopped by. Unfortunately, I think this theory will never be put to the test. I am more excited though when friends message me.

Re: Why do you waste so much time on the internet?

#685

Post by Llamamoe » Fri, May 13, 2022, 11:18 AM UTC

vorpalhex wrote: post #644

Llamamoe wrote: post #558

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It gives a constant stream of novelty and instant gratification, two things the human mind is deeply biased to crave, delivered through an interface produced by decades of A/B testing and applied behavioral psychology. It absolutely is an addiction machine.

Is chocolate an addiction machine? It tastes good. People really like it. Given the choice between rice cakes and chocolate, you'd probably choose chocolate. Chocolate manufacturers test chocolates and release the more successful ones.

Does chocolate have teams of behavioral psychologists designing every aspect of the experience of its acquisition and consumption in order to create a situation in which a huge chunk of our society is unable to stop compulsively consuming it to a point where it's negatively affecting their lives?