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Why do you waste so much time on the internet?

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Re: Why do you waste so much time on the internet?

#552
post #531

I don't. These days I try to be online only to do something specific: searching for specific, writing, email etc. I am online for 2/3 hours/day. I use Facebook Twitter etc. but not that much. Here's a trick: turn notifications off on all your devices and you'll be happier. The idea is to "consume" only the content you want and only at the time you want.

Try Daywise. It was developed in collaboration with Duke University, and I've at least in my anecdata found that most notifications even if relevant, can be addressed when sent in batches every X hours. Also has reduced my spending on "deals" online.

For Apple users, iOS/iPadOS 15 support notification summaries at set times of day:

https://www.macrumors.com/how-to/use-notification-summary/

Re: Why do you waste so much time on the internet?

#553
post #531

I don't. These days I try to be online only to do something specific: searching for specific, writing, email etc. I am online for 2/3 hours/day. I use Facebook Twitter etc. but not that much. Here's a trick: turn notifications off on all your devices and you'll be happier. The idea is to "consume" only the content you want and only at the time you want.

I can't help but think - the people who don't waste time on the internet won't be replying to comments here.

It's sort of like a self-unselecting population

Re: Why do you waste so much time on the internet?

#554
The only times in my life where I stopped "wasting time on the internet" was upon returning from a 10-day Vipassana meditation retreat. Especially after the first one this lasted for around 3-5 months. There was no effort involved on my side. It simply came very naturally to me to not check reddit/hackernews/fav blog first thing in the morning or during idle time (or at all really).

Some of that I can probably attest to the disruption in my media routine for 10 days, but that doesn't explain that it lasted for 3-5 months. During the first 3 months I overwhelmingly felt very peaceful, good, and even joyful at times, with negative emotional reactions being a very rare occurrence. I can't help but think that this was the main driver for my lack of habitual "wasting time on the internet". I just didn't need it.

If I could choose, I would prefer how it used to be instead of my current routine of checking reddit/hackernews/youtube multiple times a day. I think it's mostly not nurturing the mind in a good way. But I'm not beating myself up about it, and that's good.

Re: Why do you waste so much time on the internet?

#557
Loneliness. We don't have meaningful social connections anymore like our parents or their parents geeration had. We are so scattered, that I am unsure how many of my friends are actually friends and how many are just professional contacts. Everytime I switch job, almost 70% of my friends suddenly fall out of contact. Heck, I don't even know the people who live in next apartments both left, right, up and down on the same building. Socializing with my friends mean, setting up an appointment weeks ahead to see if we can align on a free-slot and this often involves all of us commuting to somewhere and disbanding by 22:00 hours because family, work next morning, chores to do, doctor appointment and other human things.

Interestingly, in this rat race, a lot of people suddenly inherited significant wealth and managed to use those wisely to have enough return to maintain a minimal lifestyle without working a primary 9-5. Some of us also achieved significant wealth by our early youth that we can afford to chase our hobbies for long time without worrying about the rents and bills and other responsibilities. Add social network to this, and these people cumulatively pursue things like world travelling, elaborate vacations, own businesses, YOLO etc.. , an endless stream of "other people doing YOLO" while us being worried what did I achieve so far?

So, yeah, we feel lonely, go to social sites(which is appearently the whole "internet" to non tech-savvy groups) to see how others are having it good. Then suddenly we realize we wasted a lot of time on watching others having fun and decide that, we need to get better hobbies and stop this. But the loneliness never goes away as hobbies are extra toppings when we have a complete social life, so we are again pulled back to the cesspool, because at least there we can get some connection in forms of comment, likes and we can post our opinions as well or get into hours of comment-wars(which counts as social connection too).

Re: Why do you waste so much time on the internet?

#558
post #29

I am addicted to twitter and reddit. Especially reddit. It often takes the place of reading, hobbies, quiet moments, improving my home, talking with my spouse, and playing with my baby. When reddit records a click or an upvote, it thinks it has been a Good Product, and created Engagement. Reddit then takes those feedback loops and tunes the algorithm and feedback loops to create further engagement. But in reality, th…

I would encourage you to not think of this in an addiction framework. Instead think of this as a self medicating framework. Why are you choosing reddit over spending time your baby? Do you fear handling the baby? Does handling the baby make you feel uncomfortable thoughts or feelings? Is there something, like ego, that reddit gives you? This is a good problem for self journaling, working with someone, or whatever you…

It gives a constant stream of novelty and instant gratification, two things the human mind is deeply biased to crave, delivered through an interface produced by decades of A/B testing and applied behavioral psychology.

It absolutely is an addiction machine.

Re: Why do you waste so much time on the internet?

#560
post #440

Earlier quoted context omitted.

As a married husband (almost 20 yrs) and father of five kids, allow me to share some wisdom. Spouse time is vital to a healthy, strong, vibrant, lasting relationship. Reddit doesn't care about you like your spouse does. And kids grow up way too fast. Treasure every moment.

> And kids grow up way too fast. what seems like an instant, they are gone.

I find time passing subjectively much faster when there are close long-term daily social connections (even remote), although maybe that’s just me getting older.
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