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Limb lengthening surgery is becoming more popular

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Re: Limb lengthening surgery is becoming more popular

#671

Post by imtringued »

Crabber wrote: post #244
ponder4722 wrote: post #185

Everything we are judged on - appearance, intelligence, earning potential - is a random dice roll of DNA that none of us control. Yet people take credit (pride or shame) for these traits. Pondering this has left me more detached and unimpressed with the human society game and competition... but what else is there? What am "I", if anything, beyond the randomly assigned DNA-based traits?

The problem is that you see yourself as a completely isolated individual rather than a continuation of your ancestor's genetics. You don't have a "random dice roll of DNA", you have a very specific lineage of DNA passed to you by your parents. You are the sum of your parents, and a reflection of all of your ancestors before you. I don't see anything irrational with taking pride (or shame) in the ancestral line that r…

By that logic every human has everything they need from birth. Why would your genes set you up for failure? They obviously aren't. What has changed is the environment and the existing gene pool (apparently?) is under immense selective pressure but why?

I think the biggest change is online dating. It has constrained the "selection function" to things that can be compressed into a picture and profile text. It may look like it is biased toward certain genes but at the same time it is also wholly incomplete in that regard. You don't even get to hear someone's voice which is purely derived from genetics!

Re: Limb lengthening surgery is becoming more popular

#672

Post by ___del___ »

There are lots of comments here, so I hope this get some visibility.

I feel like there is a lot of "the grass is always greener on the other side" fallacy happening here (at least in dating). I'm 199cm (just over 6'6") if that adds any weight to my experiences. I dont mean this to be a humble brag, I sympathize with anyone under stress over these issues.

Interims of dating: Being taller definitely had some advantage in terms of standing out, but from the wrong people. In university I feel like I was more of a novelty to most of the people I tried to have a relationship with, there was sometimes a lot of focus on height or size. Whenever this was apparent in someone, the value of the relationship plummets and we fall out. This made me extremely picky on who I hung out with and on top of being relatively socially awkward (I was homeschooled), this contributed to a major sense of loneliness. I only met my wife partly because she is also on the taller side (our friend set us up), and I prefer our proportionally to the average male/female ratio.

In terms of carrear: I'm early on (~4 years) in my carrear and I feel like my opinions get more recognition with less effort than others in similar positions. This is totally anecdotal however and there could by many other factors I am not aware of. One thing that did stand out tho, a I was in a small meeting with senior employees and one confronted me and said "you're much younger than you appear to be aren't you" in referring to my height. Again anecdotally, what the article states interims of business, numerous people I have met in higher power positions are generally not on the shorter side.

Re: Limb lengthening surgery is becoming more popular

#673

Post by dm319 »

imtringued wrote: post #647
jl6 wrote: post #592

I’m not here to deny that short men face challenges, the same way that anyone with any characteristic deemed negative by the prevailing dating culture faces challenges (plenty of examples to choose from - age, weight, ethnicity, wealth, disability, education, class, caste, language). I am here, though, to throw cold water on the ridiculous borderline-incel hot takes from men here who have drawn a blank on dating site…

I'm starting to think that those "20% of the men get 80% of the women" statistics are actually a property of dating apps rather than the real world. When you think about the food industry it is convenient as hell but it is also bad for you over the long term. Dating apps are just like that. If you are lucky and you find someone good for you. If you stick around too long you are discovering the terrible business model…

Yes, I'm also convinced that dating apps aren't a good way to match-make. I've had some experience of them, and there are clear problems for both men and women on it. Men struggle to get matches, women struggle to get good quality matches. The environment is artificial. A few words on your profile, a few photos that probably don't represent you in real-life, and then an artificial 'date' where it's hard for people to be natural. I met my wife in person at work. Not saying that is great either, but I find my attraction to someone is based far more on who they are in real-life than the 2D representation that a photo or some text messages can represent.

Re: Limb lengthening surgery is becoming more popular

#674

Post by nradov »

samatman wrote: post #649
nradov wrote: post #529

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Well since race is an arbitrary social construct with no consistent, objective definition then anyone can choose any racial identity they like without it being a lie. But when I was in the dating market I wouldn't have been willing to date a racist anyway, so the question is moot.

No only is that first sentence logically groundless, in that the consequent doesn't follow from the proposition, it is also dangerously untrue, please don't go around pretending to be of a racial identity you are in fact not a member of people really don't like it .

How is it logically groundless? Where is the logic?

Re: Limb lengthening surgery is becoming more popular

#675

Post by mxkopy »

twofornone wrote: post #656
jl6 wrote: post #592

I’m not here to deny that short men face challenges, the same way that anyone with any characteristic deemed negative by the prevailing dating culture faces challenges (plenty of examples to choose from - age, weight, ethnicity, wealth, disability, education, class, caste, language). I am here, though, to throw cold water on the ridiculous borderline-incel hot takes from men here who have drawn a blank on dating site…

> As if women are a monolithic bloc conspiring against your genes. As if women are spherical horses acting out the simple laws of your evolutionary psychology This is a borderline strawman. Such conclusions are based on population level trends. And yes, just like any other sexually dimorphic species, there quite literally is a "conspiracy" against undesirable genes, though it isn't necessarily conscious or absolute.…

No post body was provided.

Re: Limb lengthening surgery is becoming more popular

#676

Post by ss108 »

EricDeb wrote: post #615
maxcan wrote: post #172

Earlier quoted context omitted.

100%, but you're right that nobody wants to talk about it. I guess I've just adapted by growing thick skin around the issue and just not letting it bother me. That thick skin is, IMHO, a trait that I think has become vastly underappreciated in our society.

True but we certainly don't tell anyone else in modern society to simply develop thick skin towards unnecessary abuse (minorities, lgbtq, etc)

I don't think you're wrong to point this out, but it's also obvious that nobody is discriminating against men for being short or women for being fat the way people discriminate and have discriminated against people for being members of those groups.

I don't recall any red-lining against short men, separate water fountains or schools for short men, short-men not being allowed to get married, etc. Also, remind me the next time the NYPD sets up some extremely questionable surveillance of short-men at northeastern universities or a presidential candidate adopts banning foreign short-men from the country as part of his campaign platform.

Re: Limb lengthening surgery is becoming more popular

#677

Post by ss108 »

chrisseaton wrote: post #189
thangalin wrote: post #158

For folks in this thread making statements such as, "I don't see how one can dictate to others what they should find attractive," the negative social stigmas towards men of short stature go far beyond physical attraction. (There's absolutely nothing wrong with women finding taller men attractive.) https://twitter.com/heightismxposed Swap "short guy" for "Jew" in the quotations from those twits that have nothing to do…

Even people I respect use 'short' as some kind of slur against people they don't like. For example against Putin. (Doesn't matter what you think of Putin - slurs based on personal appearance are always wrong against anyone full stop.)

I think in the case of Putin, there may be some justification on the basis that he and his supporters (including in the West) portray him as super macho, etc.

On balance though, I think I agree with you.

Re: Limb lengthening surgery is becoming more popular

#678

Post by kingkawn »

rayiner wrote: post #543
kingkawn wrote: post #513

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What are those reasons?

Conservative women are more likely to value traditional family structures and gender roles, and thus place a higher priority on getting married and having kids. Even controlling for age, etc., conservatives are 25% more likely to be married than liberals.

Yeah but then you have to live with a conservative.

Re: Limb lengthening surgery is becoming more popular

#679

Post by flyandscan88 »

psbp wrote: post #658
ellen364 wrote: post #654

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> I didn’t read all the comments but didn’t spot a single one from anyone female. To be honest I only skimmed the article because there was so much pain and unkindness in it that I didn’t want to carefully read the whole thing. More broadly, I tend to stay out of these threads. The first of its kind that I read on HN (about divorce, I think) shocked me a little. I left with a feeling that some people commenting both…

A scary amount of men just don't think of women as people.

It's really quite simple a lot of men just want to be able to experiment sexually before they settle down. A lot of women do too. The difference is for women this is easily available in the dating world.. for men.. especially short men.. it's a distant fantasy. If these needs were met they would harbor no resentment towards women.

Re: Limb lengthening surgery is becoming more popular

#680

Post by flyandscan88 »

mxkopy wrote: post #675
twofornone wrote: post #656

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> As if women are a monolithic bloc conspiring against your genes. As if women are spherical horses acting out the simple laws of your evolutionary psychology This is a borderline strawman. Such conclusions are based on population level trends. And yes, just like any other sexually dimorphic species, there quite literally is a "conspiracy" against undesirable genes, though it isn't necessarily conscious or absolute.…

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