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Tell HN: Turned 44 today and I'm lost

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431–440 of 452 posts

Re: Tell HN: Turned 44 today and I'm lost

#431

Yes, you have reached the zenith of your career. Congratulations. You are self-sufficient and able to provide for the financial needs of your family. This is a true victory. Now, it is time to focus on people other than yourself. Most other advice on here is awful; it amounts to different directions to run on the hedonic treadmill. Instead, you have to give back now. What good is there to be done, that only you could…

Thank you for such a lovely and kind response.

Re: Tell HN: Turned 44 today and I'm lost

#432
You have something younger people can only dream of - experience. It sounds like you've got some incredible stories to tell and plenty of advice to dish out.

My advice would be to simply switch your focus from you to others. What can you do with all that experience to help others? I think people often misinterpret this kind of advice to mean the only way forward is to drop everything and go volunteer in a soup kitchen or start doing charity work. While there is nothing wrong with those things of course - it's important to pick something you genuinely care about. Otherwise it's your ego making the decision for you. If you don't genuinely love and care about how you help others, it won't work out.

Start by figuring out what your message is then decide on a medium to express it. Many people start by trying to write - maybe it's the start of a book, or a blog post or even just a private journal. I recommend writing as it's extremely easy to get started and the quickest route to realising what you don't know about what you don't know. So then - temporarily at least - the game turns into a quest for knowledge. Once you've plugged all the gaps, maybe you'll continue to write to get your message across. Or maybe you'll choose to express it through music or painting or a video game or a YouTube channel or blogging or giving a talk or starting a new business, or something else altogether? Pick whatever medium you love working with the most.

If you can avoid the trap of letting your ego take over and stay disciplined enough to do the hard work necessary to get your message out there for the purpose of helping others, it should make you feel better over time. If you slip into doing it for the success or the money or to show off around your friends, then you'll probably continue to feel the way you do now.

Re: Tell HN: Turned 44 today and I'm lost

#433

I see you. There is a lot of advice being giving here. What works for one person may work for another, and frankly, it may not. You already have the wisdom required to live a fulfilling life within. Truly believing this and discovering this wisdom is often not easy, as it appears you have already discovered. All I can say is that the process of deeply getting to know myself has been a lot of work and absolutely worth…

What did the beginning of the journey to know yourself look like? What did you do or think about to kickstart that?

For me it was dedicated time in nature getting back into my body ... trail running in particular. I'm prone to intellectualize everything, including my emotions. The mind is a wonderful thing and I've found that to depend on it for everything is pretty limiting.

This all started when I had more time to myself again after my kiddo began school 5-6 years ago (I'm 40, now). I found yoga early in this period and began to learn how to feel into my body more than ever. To feel my emotions rather than think about them, and let them pass. Also, I began to listen to and trust my intuition even for the seemingly smallest of decisions.

It seems that getting to know oneself deeply is a daily practice. At least it is for me.

edit: One more thing: journaling. By hand. 3 pages (30-45 minutes non-stop). First thing in the morning, every morning as described in "The Artist's Way." This helped get the sh*t out on paper before bringing it into the world. Whatever happened to be on my mind ... even the mindless drivel.

Re: Tell HN: Turned 44 today and I'm lost

#437

I'm in my late 20s, but I noticed that people live as if they are forever. They spend half of their life working for survival, preparing and planning for their (!) future. Some people die in the process and never live to see that future, but some people reach that point and become aware of the finite time that just elapsed. Having physical needs met is trivial in our society. Everything beyond is self imposed sufferi…

What really is important is to find a balance between being in the moment and preparing for the future. If you don't prepare for your future, in the future you won't be able to enjoy your current present. However, if you only prepare for your future, you'll never enjoy what you prepared beforehand.

Re: Tell HN: Turned 44 today and I'm lost

#439

Lookup a mystic by the name of "Sadhguru" on youtube and watch his videos, also check out jason gregory. It's totally eye opening and life changing. You NEED this. I can't possibly explain it all in one post. but, to give you a hint: everything we strive for in the outside world is all for naught. At the end of the day, what matters is your internal state of mind, how you process inputs. we keep trying to rearrange t…

+1 for Sadhguru. He is awesome. Search him up on YouTube.

Re: Tell HN: Turned 44 today and I'm lost

#440

Lookup a mystic by the name of "Sadhguru" on youtube and watch his videos, also check out jason gregory. It's totally eye opening and life changing. You NEED this. I can't possibly explain it all in one post. but, to give you a hint: everything we strive for in the outside world is all for naught. At the end of the day, what matters is your internal state of mind, how you process inputs. we keep trying to rearrange t…

Sadhguru is literally a fraud who swindles people in the name of religion. If he really cared about spreading his teachings, he wouldn't be taking thousands of rupees for his isha yoga courses. Ironically he's right now biking across two continents to spread awareness about pollution.

I disagree. I follow him for years now. He has done nothing but good for humanity.

dude, so you want a free yoga course, and so he is a fraud!

I’ve attended inner engineering course by paying $375, and it has worked like a charm - priceless.

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