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Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

dontasktoask.com

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Re: Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

#151

Post by kashyapc »

uses wrote: post #91

This reminds me of the chat situation where a coworker will start with "Hi!" typing indicator . In either case, it's like "yes, you have my attention. I cannot focus on anything at all until you hit enter, and I also can't reply because I have nothing to reply to". I also can't complain like "hey if you're going to interrupt me can you just say the whole message so I can actually reply instead of being held in absolu…

I (politely) summarize this on IRC as: "Had you asked your question to start with, my response would've been your answer."

Re: Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

#152

Post by dekhn »

My managers did this, and I realized it was because people stopped using status icons any more and just appear busy or idle all the time. They didn't want to type a long request unless they had previously established contact. I also changed to not include the entire request until the person was at least responding in real time, although I always include enough context information in the first message.

Re: Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

#153

Post by corndoge »

aix1 wrote: post #129
locusofself wrote: post #115

As much as I think this should just be common sense, when I see this URL in someone's status message/bio on a work messaging platform, it strikes me as condescending and unprofessional.

What are your thoughts on individuals publishing READMEs on how best to interact with them? Similar sort of thing or sufficiently different?

While I like the concept from one angle, on another angle I'm not reading a fucking manual every time I want to talk to someone, it's just not happening. Especially since we know people will just start adding shit to it every time something happens they don't like and we'll end up with pages of interaction rules. No thanks.

Re: Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

#154

Post by IceMetalPunk »

asiachick wrote: post #141

i want to scream when someone types their thoughts as several separate messages and seems unaware that every message is another notification

Also this.

"hi

can you talk?

i had a question

about this ticket

let me get the number

ticket DSD-342

can you help me out?"

My brain: "...that could have been ONE NOTIFICATION instead of a barrage. And you could have answered your own question about my availability by looking at my status in the app. God ffs."

What I type: "Yeah, sure, let me look at it. What's up?"

Re: Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

#155

Post by atq2119 »

corobo wrote: post #9

This feels like one of those internet rules that stems from a neurodiverse IRC-type crowd Neurotypical people use this sort of social foreplay as a way to handshake a conversation[1], where the tech types want an input/output process devoid of mood and feeling It is silly and quite time wasting online too, but it's what they need to feel comfortable asking you questions. I figure if they need to adapt to some of my q…

I don't think it's necessarily a neurotypical vs -diverse thing. It's more about social awareness that certain forms of online communication work differently from offline communication and as a consequence, different rules of etiquette apply. Remember "netiquette"?

Re: Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

#158

Post by Pooge »

IceMetalPunk wrote: post #122

Yes, this, 100%. I find it very annoying to get a notification popping up on my screen for you to say "hi" when obviously you want to ask me for something...and then you don't ask or say anything else until I stop what I'm doing and say "Hi! What's up?" back to you. After another 5-10 minutes of waiting for you to see me ask "what's up?" and then type out what is up, which we all knew you were going to end up doing a…

Bonus points if the greeting is included in the same message as the inquiry, so as to not be notified multiple times for the same thing.

Re: Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

#159

Post by MattGaiser »

mym1990 wrote: post #130
MattGaiser wrote: post #112

I often just ignore and wait for a follow up.

With you here, the weirdest part is that about 25% of the time the person doesn't say anything else if you just leave it.

Guess it didn't matter :) Saved myself some annoying request.

Re: Don't ask to ask, just ask (2019)

#160

Post by aidenn0 »

Pxtl wrote: post #121

In terms of IM etiquette this feels so far down the list of my complaints, way behind "stop sending me screenshots to things that are available live on URLs or UNC shares". Or like "it would be literally less work for you to copy/paste the hyperlink to the ticket than it was for you to type in the ticket ID manually".

> Or like "it would be literally less work for you to copy/paste the hyperlink to the ticket than it was for you to type in the ticket ID manually".

Not necessarily. When you've been spending a couple hours per day on a ticket, the ID starts to stay in your head. I can still remember the ID of a couple of the more annoying ones from several years ago

Also, with Mattermost at least (and I assume others) it's pretty easy to configure it to change "Ticket 12345" into a link to the ticket server side

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