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Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

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Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#251

Post by janeerie »

sarchertech wrote: post #180
fergal_reid wrote: post #169

This may sound controversial, initially: Consider getting a good pair of sound isolating earphones, or even ear defenders! Not to neglect your child; but to reduce stress levels so you can problem solve effectively. The cry of your baby is one of the most emotionally powerful sounds there is. You'll experience extreme stress if you can't calm them down quickly. Probably for good evolutionary reasons, so the parent do…

I have a 4 month old and my Apple Watch kept warning me to move to a quieter location while I was changing his diaper. Eventually it started aggravating my tinnitus. Now I have 2 pairs of sound dampening earmuffs like you’d wear to a gun range for diaper changes. 1 pair upstairs and 1 downstairs. I highly recommend it.

We had to wear those, too. Our son is deaf, so he would just scream as loud as he possibly could. I knew that I would end up with hearing loss also if I didn’t protect myself.

Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#252

Post by mgarfias »

gameshot911 wrote: post #103

Of kids I've always thought "maybe one day". I can see how it'd be a tough, but extremely rewarding and meaningful endeavor. But reading this article made me think for the first time "actually, I think I don't want kids." So many "mental CPU cycles" spent learning about pregnancy, babies, why they cry, how to care for them. It just doesn't appeal to me at all - I think it'd resent it taking me away from spending time…

I dunno man, it was all pretty natural for me. My first wife, not so much. Her only real solution was to stuff a boob in my oldests mouth. My 2nd wife, with my youngest is also a natural, and my youngest was pretty easy. Until he wesponized the high chair to do things like get into the chocolate (was hilarious when he got a block of unsweetened baking chocolate).

Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#253

Post by ix101 »

hipshaker wrote: post #230
gameshot911 wrote: post #103

Of kids I've always thought "maybe one day". I can see how it'd be a tough, but extremely rewarding and meaningful endeavor. But reading this article made me think for the first time "actually, I think I don't want kids." So many "mental CPU cycles" spent learning about pregnancy, babies, why they cry, how to care for them. It just doesn't appeal to me at all - I think it'd resent it taking me away from spending time…

Concieved first kid at 43. Kid is now 14 months and I am 44. Sometimes I do feel I should’ve shaved off a year or two, just because of general energy level and wanting to have a long life with my child. With that said, I am also glad I waited. Besides above, it’s the right time in my life for me. I actually never thought it would happen, but as I got older A feeling slowly crept up on me. Dying without leaving anythi…

The flip side though is that you are likely to feel more pressure to accumulate enough wealth in order to leave something behind for your children. Personally I have to shake off this instinct that I should take the more stable career choice rather than the interesting one.

Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#254

Post by sbst32 »

ido wrote: post #94
EdwardDiego wrote: post #87

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Every child is a whole new world, a whole new potential, and a whole new problem. 1. My first child couldn't be calmed easily, although I found a song that somehow worked. [0] 2. Second child could be soothed by slowly rubbing from his temple down past his eye to his cheek. 3. Third child hated that, but loved having her forehead rubbed slowly in a horizontal manner. 4. Fourth child just wanted a firm pressure on the…

Yeah, I always find it funny when someone who has themselves only been a parent for 3 months feels they can now dispense sage advice. Sorta like someone going through bootcamp giving advice about programming.

It's like someone going through bootcamp giving advice (actually just describing their experience) about the first months of bootcamp - a perfectly sensible thing to do.

Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#255

Post by vintermann »

Giorgi wrote: post #177
mattlondon wrote: post #125

Earlier quoted context omitted.

As I sit here watching my 2 year old try and figure out what the hell a helium balloon is and why does it float when everything else falls, it is quite fun and enjoyable. They surprise you and they give a lot of affection and love back. It is true that you will miss out on "me time" for several years, but that changes eventually. It is not hard work, just relentless at times. For me, I don't think I would ever have b…

This is true especially if you want to watch your child develop into adult AND have grandparents alive AND not to have huge generation gap between you.

Yes. I love my own father, but being the youngest of parents who started late (by their time's standards!) there's just such a generation gap. He grew up during WW2 in an occupied country, and in the fifties. He is - and always was - mystified by the popularity of most books, films, let alone things like computer games, despite having used computers since the fifties and having been a CS lecturer for his entire working life.

I think I have a better understanding of the world my own son grows up in. Not just in the big, generational sense, but in practical ways like remembering a lot about schools, curriculums etc. that is still relevant.

Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#257

Post by hipshaker »

ix101 wrote: post #253
hipshaker wrote: post #230

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Concieved first kid at 43. Kid is now 14 months and I am 44. Sometimes I do feel I should’ve shaved off a year or two, just because of general energy level and wanting to have a long life with my child. With that said, I am also glad I waited. Besides above, it’s the right time in my life for me. I actually never thought it would happen, but as I got older A feeling slowly crept up on me. Dying without leaving anythi…

The flip side though is that you are likely to feel more pressure to accumulate enough wealth in order to leave something behind for your children. Personally I have to shake off this instinct that I should take the more stable career choice rather than the interesting one.

That’s probably both a cultural (especially if you are from the US - which I am not) and personal “issue”. I actually do feel like that sometimes though. Not in the sense that I need to leave a big inheritance. Just make enought o help my kids out when they need it, as my parents helped me.

But in the end, the only thing you need to leave behind, is love. That’s the pressure I think one should feel. No child needed money more than a loving parent who was attentive and a caring presence. Sure, if you can be that and leave some $$ after you pass, good on you. But money comes at a price, and only lottery winners get that ride for free.

Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#258

Post by throwaway98700k »

notch656a wrote: post #223
ars wrote: post #89

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Colic is really bad, it hurts the baby quite a bit, so they'll cry non-stop, which makes the adults crazy. If you have such a baby, it helps to remember how badly it's hurting them. Have you ever had really bad heartburn? Now imagine that for hours on end, with no ability to do anything about it.

It hurts everyone really bad. The child is screaming 12-16 hours a day, for in our case 9 months on end. It nearly resulted in divorce of a couple that had been through a lot with strength. It's hard on the child but it's also genuine torture to scream at someone 12-16 hours a day from the bottom of your lungs, in fact I'd call it domestic violence to torture others in this manner. Unless you've experienced this for…

Our baby had colic for the first three months. Nothing worked, as you said. Felt like it would last forever. Then one day she stopped. And at 3 months she started sleeping through the night.

Then vaccines, teething, a virus, etc. At 7 months this is the first time we have a baby that isn’t crying all day long.

Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#259

Post by throwaway98700k »

smusamashah wrote: post #234

Do the infants (less than a year) sleep automatically as in, you put them down on bed when they are tired and they go to sleep by themselves? Or do you have to make them sleep with lullabies, holding in arms, rocking them, humming, white noise, on your belly, etc etc until they finally fall asleep? My 7mo son slept all by himself only twice in his lifetime. I wonder if everyone has to make their babies sleep like we…

Our 7mo old will sleep with a bottle of milk in the cot with her propped up by a blanket, which is our night time routine. Or with a blanket on her cheek. Or she’ll fall asleep in my arms while watching TV, but will wake up immediately and dance a jig if I try to put her in the cot. She also falls asleep in the baby carrier after 10mims if walking around, after which I can put her in the cot most times.

She’s fallen asleep while sat by herself about 4 times.

I heard white noise can mess with their development—it’s important to be able to sleep with random background noises like a door opening or a pencil dropping, so we never used it much.

Re: Why babies cry in the first three months, how to tell them apart, and what to do

#260

Post by barbazoo »

wincy wrote: post #245
barbazoo wrote: post #241

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I would love to have co-slept when ours was little but we were pretty anxious about accidentally hurting them. Maybe next time.

I didn’t keep her on my side of the bed because we noticed I slept much more deeply than my wife did. However, my wife was still waking up well rested despite being relatively alert with the infant, breast feeding ad libitum. I’ve heard that this is a problem with women who have to go back to work though as the bottle feeding and such preps the child for day care. Our daughter got the majority of her calories from br…

Without maternity leave for sure. Good point re sleep depth. I'm definitely the one with deeper sleep.
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