Why are young people having so little sex? (2018) • Hacker News Board

Re: Why are young people having so little sex? (2018)

#211

Post by paulnpace » Fri, Feb 18, 2022, 4:48 PM UTC

spywaregorilla wrote: post #197

paulnpace wrote: post #174

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Of these, the sperm count strikes me as more causal, while the others may be results of some problem. Granted, the decline in sperm count is caused by something, but in relation to impact on behaviors, the decline will cause (as proxy) changes, and of those changes could be the increased medication, for example.

Sperm count dropping is caused by obesity

> Sperm count dropping is caused by obesity

It may be the obesity decreases sperm count, but sperm count is dropping in people who are not obese. More than a decade ago there were reports on studies where the authors made simple extrapolations that sperm count would be zero by 2050, but these simple extrapolations are holding true in today's trends.

Re: Why are young people having so little sex? (2018)

#212

Post by beepbooptheory » Fri, Feb 18, 2022, 4:50 PM UTC

Throwaway8373 wrote: post #181

beepbooptheory wrote: post #128

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Its doesn't have to completely be a challenge or game like that. Or, if it is, you will need to read an entire body of literature for each separate person you want to get to know. When it comes to romantic relationships, the difference between every single person is on a universal magnitude, there is no way you can generally prepare. There is not a ground to stand on with these things unfortunately, there is just the…

It is definitely easy to go down the road of relativazation. * On reading: For most people we need better role models than our parents. For sexuality this is probably even ore true. * Every person is not so different. It would appear that sexual dreams are in variation of 10 different "universal" ones. * Studying the underlying dynamics is not about trying hard, indeed it is the contrary. You probably don't even know…

Ha! Fair enough I guess. You're conceptions about people are pretty alien to me, but they are yours and I can only hope you find your way, fill the glass you were given in life.

All the books I have read could only demonstrate love, or try to articulate it, not outline a techne for it. I think in these matters music can be more instructive perhaps?

Either way, I still firmly believe that you cannot encounter each woman you meet as some token of the grand category "Woman," we are all just people, and our gender is defined by society, but love shouldn't be.

Remember with all things related to human passion and desire, the thing you should fear the most is actually getting what you want. The best you can hope for is to be surprised by people, to be understood by them, to be transformed by them.

EDIT: here is a book for you, its pretty good

https://www.amazon.com/Desire-Love-Lauren-Berlant/dp/0615686...

If anything, in your schema, it would make sense to read books on the subject that are written by women.

Re: Why are young people having so little sex? (2018)

#213

Post by globular-toast » Fri, Feb 18, 2022, 4:51 PM UTC

seneca wrote: post #75

commandlinefan wrote: post #46

My fear when I was young was that women for the most part really would rather not, but just put up with it because it was sort of required if you wanted to participate in the married and had kids portion of civilization. The older I get, the more I suspect I was probably right.

I can assure you, that is absolutely not the case for most women, though it may be for some. Women are perfectly capable of enjoying sex.

All women want sex, but they probably don't want sex with you.

This is the biggest difference that people need to understand. Most men would have sex with most women. Most women would not have sex with most men.

Even men in the top 10% of attractiveness can easily find women who won't have sex with them. Meanwhile women in the top 50% of attractiveness can effortlessly find men who will have sex with them.

Re: Why are young people having so little sex? (2018)

#214

Post by beaconstudios » Fri, Feb 18, 2022, 4:52 PM UTC

paulnpace wrote: post #102

beaconstudios wrote: post #32

Wow this thread is wild. My understanding is it's because nobody can afford their own place - either living with their parents or roommates.

Indeed, there are so many problems caused by the lack of housing construction (that is nationwide and codified in law) that many attribute to pretty much anything but this readily identifiable trend. I also believe it is a significant input to the trend of younger people not "bothering" to work hard. From the perspective of someone very young, it may well appear that working 40+ hours per week does little to increase…

True, and I think with the stratospheric income inequality it's becoming more obvious to many that working hard does not lead to success when investors and executives are capturing more and more of the value of companies. Nobody wants to work hard to be paid nothing while their efforts just further enrich the already-rich.

This also contributes to the housing shortage as the wealthy buy up property as real estate investments and either rent them out, leaving renters with no equity to realise into deposits for better housing down the line, or leave them empty.

Re: Why are young people having so little sex? (2018)

#215

Post by paulnpace » Fri, Feb 18, 2022, 5:04 PM UTC

beaconstudios wrote: post #214

paulnpace wrote: post #102

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Indeed, there are so many problems caused by the lack of housing construction (that is nationwide and codified in law) that many attribute to pretty much anything but this readily identifiable trend. I also believe it is a significant input to the trend of younger people not "bothering" to work hard. From the perspective of someone very young, it may well appear that working 40+ hours per week does little to increase…

True, and I think with the stratospheric income inequality it's becoming more obvious to many that working hard does not lead to success when investors and executives are capturing more and more of the value of companies. Nobody wants to work hard to be paid nothing while their efforts just further enrich the already-rich. This also contributes to the housing shortage as the wealthy buy up property as real estate inv…

> True, and I think with the stratospheric income inequality it's becoming more obvious to many that working hard does not lead to success when investors and executives are capturing more and more of the value of companies. Nobody wants to work hard to be paid nothing while their efforts just further enrich the already-rich.

This is introducing some other topic into the discussion. The problem of housing price increases is unrelated to this, and more likely related to destruction of new-business formation. The American middle class has always been lead by small businesses, and new business formation has been steadily dropping for decades. Small businesses do not suffer the same issues as working in large corporations, so when large corporations make up larger and larger percentages of the workforce, they also shift other aspects related to employment and income.

> This also contributes to the housing shortage as the wealthy buy up property as real estate investments and either rent them out, leaving renters with no equity to realise into deposits for better housing down the line, or leave them empty.

The housing shortage is completely a regulatory problem where the supply is artificially constricted in ways it was never previously controlled. People often think of housing as somehow not falling into the same supply and demand price function problems as other products, but this simply isn't true. The "wealthy" could never hope to purchase all of the bread fast enough to make any real dent in the price because of how rapidly the production of bread would be increased with their artificial increase in demand. This scheme can only work with artificial constriction on supply that comes from the regulations on the construction of new residential units, because without these regulatory constrictions developers would build houses until either the investors run out of money or we are all working in the home construction industry.

Re: Why are young people having so little sex? (2018)

#216

Post by spywaregorilla » Fri, Feb 18, 2022, 5:05 PM UTC

paulnpace wrote: post #211

spywaregorilla wrote: post #197

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Sperm count dropping is caused by obesity

> Sperm count dropping is caused by obesity It may be the obesity decreases sperm count, but sperm count is dropping in people who are not obese. More than a decade ago there were reports on studies where the authors made simple extrapolations that sperm count would be zero by 2050, but these simple extrapolations are holding true in today's trends.

I searched for a source to credibly defend that statement and have found none. I'm open to being shown otherwise.

Some studies will bin people by BMI or some metric but fail to do any analysis on whether people aren't fatter within the bins. E.g. if the bell curve shifts right, the average weight of people within the slimmest band will still be heavier than before; even if the maximum BMI/weight is still capped at the same upper bound. And the deltas on sperm counts within healthy weight ranges are very small in most studies to begin with.

edit: searched in the past; not the few minutes since your comment*

Re: Why are young people having so little sex? (2018)

#217

Post by Kye » Fri, Feb 18, 2022, 5:08 PM UTC

bmarquez wrote: post #88

javert wrote: post #58

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What he said is true in rural America . In the religious areas, which is most of 'em. This is a divided country. You'd be shocked at how seriously people take religion and how it affects views on sex.

Having gone to private Christian schools when I was younger (in suburban America but not quite rural), I'm going to offer the anecdote that religious people are just as sexual as non-religious people. They just won't admit to it openly or on surveys.

I've heard of all the kinds of concepts they invent to have sex while saying they didn't. They'll show up as untainted by impure thoughts and behavior in surveys, but they're having it.

One recurring thing in particular: religious men who have sex with men and consider themselves abstinent/faithful to their wives because "it doesn't count."

Re: Why are young people having so little sex? (2018)

#218

Post by beaconstudios » Fri, Feb 18, 2022, 5:11 PM UTC

paulnpace wrote: post #215

beaconstudios wrote: post #214

Earlier quoted context omitted.

True, and I think with the stratospheric income inequality it's becoming more obvious to many that working hard does not lead to success when investors and executives are capturing more and more of the value of companies. Nobody wants to work hard to be paid nothing while their efforts just further enrich the already-rich. This also contributes to the housing shortage as the wealthy buy up property as real estate inv…

> True, and I think with the stratospheric income inequality it's becoming more obvious to many that working hard does not lead to success when investors and executives are capturing more and more of the value of companies. Nobody wants to work hard to be paid nothing while their efforts just further enrich the already-rich. This is introducing some other topic into the discussion. The problem of housing price increa…

The blue collar middle class of the middle century was led by industrial scale manufacturing, which doesn't typically come from small companies.

I know supply side restriction constrains the creation of new housing as well, but the wealthy buying up properties in cities and renting them out or leaving them unoccupied restricts access to property in areas where land for new building is limited. You can build suburbs all day out in the stix (theoretically) but nobody who works in a city wants a 2 hour commute each way.

Depends on the city of course; I'm thinking Toronto, New York and London where empty houses are a big problem but I know that SF has a major issue with NIMBYism so YMMV.

Re: Why are young people having so little sex? (2018)

#219

Post by jzackpete » Fri, Feb 18, 2022, 5:18 PM UTC

NotSammyHagar wrote: post #70

caeril wrote: post #14

It's burying the lede to suggest that young people are having less sex. The salient fact is that it's young men who are skewing this average down. Women, on average, are doing perfectly fine in the sexual marketplace, along with the top 10-15% of men. edit: The above was my reflexive response to the headline. Now that I've actually read the article, I have to say that the article is very good and quite comprehensive,…

This looks like the start of an incel complaint. You really think that 1/8 of men are sexing up 8x women, and "taking your opportunity" or something? In reality women are looking for partners too. No one owes anyone anything, just be a decent person, try to get over your expectations of the world owing you something.

I agree, when do we abolish taxes?

Re: Why are young people having so little sex? (2018)

#220

Post by karmakurtisaani » Fri, Feb 18, 2022, 5:19 PM UTC

Throwaway8373 wrote: post #177

karmakurtisaani wrote: post #110

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've been out of the game for so long that maybe I'm completely out of touch, but if I was to re-enter the market for some reason, I'd approach this more as a challenge to get to know people and make friends rather than a quick way to get to rub genitals together. That would basically lead to ignoring anyone expecting to be courted, but I don't think I'd lose much in that. Following stupid dating game rules is stupid…

I am not entirely sure what this is a response to. Had I written Neil Strauss and the PUA movement, it would have seemed merited?

To me the original comment came off as frustrated and possibly anxious about the "rules" of dating and I tried to respond to that. Maybe i missed the mark.