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Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

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Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#871

Post by hackerfromthefu »

CRConrad wrote: post #816
romanovcode wrote: post #177

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> play a small part of something impactful that's larger than yourself and will be respected for generations. So do you know anyone from MS who played part except Bill Gates and Steve Ballmer? I would attribute the guy who invented C# and TypeScript a significant impact, however I don't even know his name without googleing it.

And hackerfromthefu isn't the only one who knew that by heart; I was going to supply you with the name when I noticed that someone already had. Not mr Hejlsberg's fault that you don't know his name, is it?

Yes I'm a huge fan!

I've followed his career for 2 decades using his tooling because he has the sense of style and expertise to create development tooling that was generations ahead of the competition, the best I've ever found from trying so many languages. He's also a really personable and humble genius based on the relatively few videos and interviews available. In my opinion he's the Michael Jordan of software, though he's more humble!

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#872

Post by hackerfromthefu »

doktorhladnjak wrote: post #703
hermitcrab wrote: post #600

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Running can be hard on the joints though. A mix of different exercize is best, if you can manage it. Both for health and to keep it interesting. I do running, cycling, swimming and kick boxing (less swimming during COVID).

There's really no evidence that running is hard on your joints, as long as you avoid serious injuries. If anything, studies have shown that those who run regularly have better mobility in old age.

I have seen that research too, and I believe it. However running is bad on joints for many people, including me.

I believe the difference that makes the difference is how good your joint alignment is before starting. If your alignment is bad the running can chronically damage the joints, if your alignment is good they will get only slightly damaged and regrow stronger, leading to the results shown in the studies. Survivorship bias means only people with good joint alignment will actually run enough to be included in a study.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#873

Post by xwdv »

escapedmoose wrote: post #866
xwdv wrote: post #627

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The reason you feel this way is because you’ve never been on the other side. Imagine reaching mid thirties, no more friends, no partner, no real prospects, and getting older is making it harder to attract quality females. Your only source of somewhat human interaction is writing on the internet. It is a life of quiet desperation. There is only one goal, to accumulate money, watch graphs go up and to the right. Money…

I haven't been on the other side, and I think I mentioned that I feel silly complaining about this life. But my version of life also feels like "a life of quiet desperation." I suppose it's better with a partner than it would be without, just as it's better with money than without, but that feels like splitting hairs in the face of existential meaninglessness.

Do you have an idea of what your ideal life would be?

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#874

Post by bregma »

sriram_malhar wrote: post #137
bregma wrote: post #100

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Then you learn about how the medical system works. Everything present a learning opportunity; it's up to you to embrace it and earn some benefit.

Just to be clear, don't embrace the steam engine.

Why, because the engine won't reciprocate?

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#875

Post by reciprocity »

arisAlexis wrote: post #688
baxtr wrote: post #244

Earlier quoted context omitted.

+1 on all of them. I would add reading. That has helped me a lot to calm down. Re health: I recently discovered a great blog with in-depth articles about how to lose weight: https://physiqonomics.com PS: Don't get distracted by the seemingly arrogant profile picture. His content is really good.

I took up reading during the quarantine and it changed my life

Anything in particular that you would recommend?

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#876

Post by escapedmoose »

xwdv wrote: post #873
escapedmoose wrote: post #866

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I haven't been on the other side, and I think I mentioned that I feel silly complaining about this life. But my version of life also feels like "a life of quiet desperation." I suppose it's better with a partner than it would be without, just as it's better with money than without, but that feels like splitting hairs in the face of existential meaninglessness.

Do you have an idea of what your ideal life would be?

I think it would start with "not having to work to live" and from there cascade into lots of time spent building personal projects and playing Scrabble with my parents. What would yours be?

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#878

Post by spikej »

justsomehnguy wrote: post #800
inimino wrote: post #762

Earlier quoted context omitted.

SQL isn't quite comparable today to punchcards in 1990, is it?

Depends on who you would ask. Anecdata: was asked by a client why the same query was running orders slower on our infrastructure (IaaS on Xeons) than on their test server (a regular desktop with i7). I check the load, IO, yada-yada and I don't see anything what could indicate the slowness. After a bit I check the db size and ... I'm pretty speechless, because it is 77MBs. 77 megabytes and the query runs for tens of s…

With the rise of ORMS, I'm coming across more and more devs in my work that have no idea how to write performant SQL, and don't ever check to see what gets generated and run "behind the scenes"

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#879

Post by madjayhawk »

My birthday was yesterday. I have now lived 80 years on this planet. Seen a lot, done a lot. Do I feel old? Absolutely not. Few aches and pains and other physical problems I let my doctors worry about.

My advice, for what it is worth, is to find some things that you enjoy doing. It can literally be anything. If you are an introvert do things by yourself. Do not force yourself to be around others excessively. If you are an extrovert find things to do with others. That is the real key to happiness. I am an introvert and do things that do not require me to interact with others. Makes me perfectly happy. I have friends. Some of whom go places with others and do things constantly with others and that makes them happy. You will see by my list below that I am a card carrying introvert.

I decided to learn programming. Now I am on problem #50 of the Euler Project. I am, by own estimation, a pretty decent Python programmer. I found bread making some time ago after I retired and bake things for myself and lucky friends and neighbors. I travel. Been literally everywhere with a smile on my face and a walking stick in my hand. I now have time for reading now. Just read The Fatal Shores by Robert Hughes. I love history after hating it in high school. Walking: walk 2-3 miles a day. Ukulele: one of the most relaxing instruments in the world. I love sitting down for 30 minutes and working on a song or two. Then there is backgammon. I am a backgammon fiend. Play it daily. Have become a 'feared' player because of how aggressively I play.

Point is: have a variety of interests, some of which can be passions. Try something and if you don't like it find something else. If you are an extrovert, find a group of people to do things with. Forget stimulants like alcohol or drugs. Life is stimulating enough. Wake up every morning with plans for the day.

Re: Ask HN: How do you deal with getting old and feeling lost?

#880

Post by madjayhawk »

pw4001 wrote: post #825
alangibson wrote: post #79

This is almost exactly my life, shifted by a decade. The problem is that by 35 you can't get by on novelty anymore because you've seen some version of everything there is to see. The worst thing you can do is pine for the good old days. They aren't coming back. And they weren't that good anyway. Your best times are ahead if you can successfully adjust. What worked for me was putting down roots. I resisted it mightily…

I'm a month from 71 and I still get excited by stuff. Things I half expected aren't going to happen in my lifetime (fusion for example after working on JET years back) which is disappointing. And flying cars - thankfully seeing how ground based cars are handled. OTOH I came across the Internet in the early 70s and it's been amazing to watch it change. I still work in cyber security and that keeps giving challenges wh…

I used to like music. Now I think it muddles the brain. I am 80. Brains are marvelous things but the thing I don't think can handle multiple inputs over a significant period of time. I prefer quiet when I am engaged with any project or activity except those involving the opposite sex.
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