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Ask HN: Burned Out. What Now?

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191–200 of 277 posts

Re: Ask HN: Burned Out. What Now?

#191
Take it seriously. Take a break, at least a month, preferably 2 or 3. I lost my best DBA 3 months ago due to burnout and I was on the verge of burning out myself, then I jumped out to an extended vacation. So far (4 weeks later) it did not do wonders, but it helps. It depends on the relation you have with your manager, but if you got burned out it usually means you don't have a good one (he does not care enough). If you continue working there is very little chance to improve anything, but try to work just 8 hours a day and disconnect the rest of the day and the entire weekend; I was working more than 80 hours a week, but my DBA was doing just 40 and the extra stress of these times hit him harder. Find a hobby that is relaxing and spend time doing that, but make sure it is relaxing.

Re: Ask HN: Burned Out. What Now?

#192

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'd like to add to the list of things to try: Go to an eye doctor if you haven't been in a while, even if you've always had perfect vision in the past. We tech workers spend a lot of time staring at screens, and minor eye discomfort can compound into a major source of stress without you necessarily being aware of it.

Interesting. Any links?

No, just personal anecdotal experience!

Re: Ask HN: Burned Out. What Now?

#194
post #185
post #164

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Your capacity planning is off. If a few people out of hundreds are out sick, this should in no way affect the others as a whole.

"out sick" is one thing. Taking a full year off is another. Our capacity plans include set aside time for people for sick leave, vacations, meetings, and things like "Hack week", etc. We don't have capacity set aside for people to take a year off like it ain't no thang.

That's a problem for you. It's not a problem in Germany when a few people out of hundreds are out healing.

Re: Ask HN: Burned Out. What Now?

#195
post #88

There's no right answer for those questions. I've burned out twice. Both times I quit. Took a year off between the two. I travelled both times, and then just had my own routine at home. I had no problem finding another job when it was time to come back. - You can tell your boss. Expect sympathy, but, any plan that works for you is probably one you'll have come up with. - If you leave, I'd recommend not dictating when…

Did those break change your attitude when going back onto the market ? I'm feeling less naive and more picky, which also makes me more curious and more motivated. As if a kind of freedom grew. A necessary one.

It informed some questions I'd ask in interviews, informed some push back I'd give following crunches, and made contemplating subsequent departures seem less unsurmountable.

Best of wishes to you. :)

Re: Ask HN: Burned Out. What Now?

#196
post #135

See a psychologist and/or psychiatrist, seriously. You're dealing with your mental health here, don't rely on posts on the internet to handle a serious health problem. Burn out can easily spiral into something like clinical depression or anxiety disorders, and then you'll be dealing with the burden of burn out and additional health problems.

What about the post made you think they aren't seeking professional help?

They're asking for advice and I'm giving it. They didn't mention getting professional help, so I did.

Re: Ask HN: Burned Out. What Now?

#197
I’ll preface this by saying I have a lot of thoughts about the social and organizational causes of burnout — collapsed labor protections, zero boundaries between personal and professional life, and (gestures wildly at the pandemic) basically everything around us at the moment. I believe we’ve built a culture of work where the default setting is to push people until they fail, and then treat that failure as aberrant and place the fault on the person. So I think organizations should be responsible for preventing and addressing employee burnout, but alas, you’ll need to manage individual recovery so I’ll try to stick to the actionable bits of the questions you asked.

When I burned out, I read quite a bit on burnout research and a very interesting finding is the conclusion that burnout it isn’t necessarily a result of overwork. It can be, sure. But more often it’s the result of a mismatch between effort and reward, or misalignment in the value or meaning of your work.

Christina Maslach, a seminal researcher, co-developed a detailed survey known as the Maslach Burnout Inventory to measure burnout. Her theory is that any one of the following six problems can empty us: working too much; working in an unjust environment; working with little social support; working with little agency or control; working in the service of values different than our own; working for insufficient reward (whether the currency is money, prestige, or positive feedback).

I suggest googling and taking the Maslach Burnout Inventory to get a sense of which of these 6 areas is most affecting your sense of burnout to help guide you on what you should do next.

> Should I take time off? Should I tell my boss and/or team

I believe these questions are directed at what actions you can take to address the burnout in your current work environment.

Burnout can present as any combination of three distinct symptoms: exhaustion (a depletion of mental or physical resources), cynical detachment (a depletion of social connectedness), and a reduced sense of efficacy (a depletion of value for oneself).

The specific actions you should take depends on which combination of symptoms you have, but researchers generally think agency is the most restorative path to heal burnout. There are a lot of suggestions in this thread toward the self-care path and while self-care is important, it may not be as healing to the root cause of burnout if it doesn’t help you feel like you are in control of your work life. If I can throw in my two cents, I’d recommend activities that help you feel empowered and in control. That’s not terribly actionable advice as-is, but hopefully helps direct your effort: what can you do to feel more in control of your work? This might mean staying where you are, but it might be finding a different work place that’s better suited to your needs.

> Is there anything specific to working in tech and burning out?

By and large- no. Healthcare, social services, and non-profit work have higher burnout rates than tech. But research suggests there are certain profiles of people who experience burnout more acutely and these traits may appear more often in tech: young, single, childless people. It may seem counter-intuitive but older workers have more perspective and experience than young idealists who run into a wall when high expectations don’t match reality, and married people and parents don’t depend on their jobs as highly for fulfillment.

Something you said stood out to me: “I don't have many hobbies (if any) and in the middle of the pandemic there isn't much to do anyway”- do you have activities or things in your life that bring fulfillment? If not, this could be contributing to your burnout (if your job is your only source of fulfillment).

Good luck in your reflections and journey.

Re: Ask HN: Burned Out. What Now?

#198
post #22
post #4

Start sleeping 10+ hours a day for a while.

I have horrible insomnia and would be thrilled with 4+ hours/day. Your notion that one could just sleep any amount at will is a wilder fantasy than the ones I have about Scarlett Johannson. Nothing helps: drugs, meditation, quitting caffeine, dietary changes, exercise, etc.

I am pretty resistant to sleeping pills, I did find Benadryl (Diphenhydramine) around 50mg to work very well for me. Not the best solution, but getting 4 hours of sleep is definitely worse, I've been there quite a few times.

Re: Ask HN: Burned Out. What Now?

#199
post #22

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I have horrible insomnia and would be thrilled with 4+ hours/day. Your notion that one could just sleep any amount at will is a wilder fantasy than the ones I have about Scarlett Johannson. Nothing helps: drugs, meditation, quitting caffeine, dietary changes, exercise, etc.

I am pretty resistant to sleeping pills, I did find Benadryl (Diphenhydramine) around 50mg to work very well for me. Not the best solution, but getting 4 hours of sleep is definitely worse, I've been there quite a few times.

Thanks! Tried it but it just made me sleepy but not able actually to sleep. I very much appreciate the thought.

Re: Ask HN: Burned Out. What Now?

#200
- I didn't tell my team because I didn't have the energy to. They called me and asked what's wrong. Then I took 3 months off. Then got back with 25% basically staring at a screen doing nothing then walk home. I did this for another month.

- Summer came. - I started therapy and joined a group that helped me understand my behaviour of perfectionism etc. Most helpful 12 week programme.

- I played video games to offload my brain, as I couldn't focus or read text

- I started painting also - was awful at school hated drawing etc, but turned out together with video games it was the only thing that could put off that load on my brain.

- I basically took a stance to never go back again to IT. It didn't work out though but I'm in a more aware situation and don't put too much load on myself. Another thing is that I realised it's just not for me to code, to keep worrying about systems, wondering what might break etc. I'm really more of a practical guy.

- So right now I'm trying to shift my focus where I can recognize my strengths first. Being at a desk is not really that, and that's hard to realize though.

Burnout is really...your overheated engine in the car. You can't use it. At least that's how it was for me.

I could write a lot more but DM if you need anything.

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