221–230 of 290 posts
My mother is a highly-functional alcoholic who, in her 60s, still drinks and smokes every day from 6pm to 1am, alone or socially, rain or shine - and she's done that for 30+ years. I'll spare you the gruesome anecdata that the habit produced over the years. Being an alcoholic is a recipe for hurting people around you. It might not happen today or tomorrow, but sooner or later it will happen, whether you understand it…
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This magazine or blog or whatever seems to either be an elaborate joke or bait or something: >Are you guys for real? >Yes. While there is some satire involved, we believe to the very core of our >souls every word we write. >Who are you? >We are a group of functional alcoholics based primarily in Denver, CO. Included in our ranks are published novelists, filmmakers, English gentlemen, barflies, punk rock musicians, co…
> This magazine or blog or whatever seems to either be an elaborate joke or bait or something Or you know, part of the once respected in some circles tradition of self-destruction with style, before everybody started jogging and going vegan to live to 100 years old as a "productive" boring member of society...
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I definitely used to think that way. It's the type of thing that is a lot of fun to be a part of, until it isn't anymore. It's a thrilling way to self identify, until it becomes your entire identity. I hope they all end up ok.
I was sort of forced out of that identity by COVID lockdown and domestic imperatives. I used to be proud of how many cans I could pound in a session before I got kicked out of a bar. Now, if I or anyone else do that, it's a huge pain in the ass. I still don't trust people that have never been drunks, though. There's something about the forceful rejection of social norms involved in becoming an alcoholic that I find r…
I agree with everything in this article. Drinking alone is the best, particularly if you like to write while listening to music. The flights of fancy I used to go on! I wish I could still do it, but I found myself waiting for the liquor store to open up at 7:00 am to get rid of the shakes. Then when I tried to stop I couldn't. Long story short, after several rehabs, more stints in mental health lockup than I care to…
I have very strict rules I follow for alcohol consumption, if for no other reason than I'm the son of a man who was a functioning alcoholic for most of his life. I've read the big book, and consider it a source of wisdom, even if I perhaps don't follow all of the tenants contained within. The serenity prayer, which is AA adjacent if not (now) directly part of the AA wisdom is my personal lodestar, it's great wisdom o…
This is also a teaching of stoicism. Focus only on those things you can actually change and understand that your reaction to external things is under your control
“The chief task in life is simply this: to identify and separate matters so that I can say clearly to myself which are externals not under my control, and which have to do with the choices I actually control. Where then do I look for good and evil? Not to uncontrollable externals, but within myself to the choices that are my own…” – Epictetus
“If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.” ― Marcus Aurelius
Some of my deepest reflections on my self and my life have come about during those moments.
I do exercise constraint however, only doing this occasionally (1-2 p. month) and limit the amount to 2-3 glasses. So never truly let go like the article mentioned (I don't think that is actually needed, and will become harmful in the long run).
there are far better and stronger drugs you can do alone for introspection. a night by yourself on shrooms could change you more than 100 nights drinking alone, without the hangover or liver damage
So neither supercedes the other.
Drinking too much and frequently will though have more health impacts for sure. Just don't do strong psychedelics all alone if you are unused ro them. That can end your life in one go (as it has for some).
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Most "real [1]" alcoholics try over and over to stop like myself and Bill Wilson. The following story from the Big Book illustrates the problem [2] Yet he got drunk again. We asked him to tell us exactly how it happened. This is his story: "I came to work on Tuesday morning. I remember I felt irritated that I had to be a salesman for a concern I once owned. I had a few words with the boss, but nothing serious. Then I…
Do you mind if I ask what was your trauma? I ask because on the one hand it’s fair to say that I’ve never suffered. Not like my wife. Not like many on this board. On the other I have have a pain, and I know where it’s from, but it seems so idiotic compared to what others have suffered. And yet I seek escapism, the trance state where I try to forget my existence.
Perhaps part of you views it as “idiotic” because it is reluctant to address it?
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> This magazine or blog or whatever seems to either be an elaborate joke or bait or something Or you know, part of the once respected in some circles tradition of self-destruction with style, before everybody started jogging and going vegan to live to 100 years old as a "productive" boring member of society...
There's nothing stylish about being an alcoholic, but people often conflate the two because plenty of prominent, stylish people were also alcoholics. Drinking didn't make them stylish, and anyone who thinks getting lit will turn them into Keith Richards is probably a massive burden on everyone who has to put up with them.
I always drink alone these days, Covid killed whatever superficial drinking groups I had joined. Though I tend to prefer to go out, as opposed to being at home. I’m stuck in the apartment for most of the day anyway. I’ve never been bothered much by it in the past, but I think I’m quickly getting sick of it. It frankly gets boring, hanging out at bars all night aimlessly drinking. Yeah I talk people on occasion, but w…
Yeah going to bars is pretty boring, it just doesn't achieve anything, plus it negatively affects your mental and physical health. It's like paying to slowly kill yourself. Perhaps they called you out because they're concerned about you.
Thinking that somebody else at a bar calling him a loser is looking out for his best interest is a little ridiculous