The assortment of medication available for depression is laughable. Even for other neurological disorders, they're so unselective and "broad spectrum," affecting numerous other systems, that it turns into an absurdity: how are we this far behind? Wasn't modern medicine supposed to equal better living?
It's like zero thought has been put into quality of life by practitioners, so long as their metrics are met
E.g. "x, y, z attributes on the ABC scale went down. Looks like you're in remission!"
"But doctor, my dick doesn't work, I've gained 40lbs, and everything feels flat."
"We can prescribe a stimulant for appetite suppression, a vasodilator for the libido... but the 'flat' is all in your head. I'm going to write you a recommendation to a psychologist so they can talk to you about it."
Absolute ninnies.
I understand what you mean about engaging in out-of-personality behaviors, lack of moral code, and the nausea and panic that accompanies the memories of "who you were" on a certain medication (they do go away, with time. And they lose their emotional impact once you accept that it was due to medication, and rationalize it away). They warn you that there might be personality changes, and you'll feel different, but I don't think they understand the absolute gravity of what that means. Even pharmacists go on their soapbox every time you ask for a different brand (because X brand doesn't feel the same, and the FDA has issued numerous warnings about quality control): "the only thing different about brand name medication is the marketing. They're all bio-equivalent and it's all in your head." Fuck off.
This isn't even addressing that it's likely most of the "anti-depressive" effect is placebo in SSRIs and the like. "Oh I feel very different now from this medication. That means it's strong, and effective, and I should be getting better now"; it's in the same vein as chiropractic, except with more woo-woo and theatre ("modern medicine!!!").
There are better substances that can be used off-label/aren't "copyrighted" that actually solve emotional issues by (properly) regulating neurotransmitters and genomic expression to achieve pro-humanist results, instead of soulless pro-metrics and "quantitative" results. But they're not being marketed, because the current batch of psychoactive chemicals is riding on decades of marketing and "works" (see: generates outsized profits).
In my opinion, almost all of these have been a net-negative on society. Opiates, benzos, "anti-psychotics," "anti-depressives," and the like: they're all shit.
There are better chemical (and lifestyle solutions) to these problems, but right now the medical complex has a hard-fought monopoly on health treatment; so anything that would usurp power from them is a no-no (a la "fuck pro-consumer, I'm getting mine").