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Procrastinatory Doom Loops

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Re: Procrastinatory Doom Loops

#241

Post by cipheredStones »

drakonka wrote: post #100
cipheredStones wrote: post #33

I spent about a third of 2021 more or less consumed by this phenomenon. In my case it was triggered by job searching: I quit my existing position, intending to do a leisurely search over a few months... and then avoided nearly everything related to the job search for over four months. (While still experiencing a ton of stress as a result of constant anxiety and guilt about it.) Once I actually started, I landed an am…

This is interesting since it reminds me of the dynamic I have with my boyfriend as well. We seem to be opposites in this regard. I work better alone. Having someone else there, even if they aren't purposefully distracting me, just adds another tiny bit of awareness: Is he hungry? Is he bored? Does he want coffee? We haven't had lunch - should I cook? I should tidy. I feel like when there's a guest in my house I need…

I'm curious how long you've been dating your boyfriend. I've been with my girlfriend for a little under three years, and I think I would have felt much more pressure to attend to her like you're describing if we were only, say, a year in. (Although I don't actually know, because at that point we were in a long-distance relationship, so all the time we spent together in person was intensive relationship time.)

The other factor for me is that job searching is not like coding: it's a series of separate tasks/decisions/evaluations, rather than me trying to immerse myself in a problem or system, so interruptions or distractions aren't nearly as costly; I'm not going to go into flow state from job searching. And a lot of the difficulty comes from the emotional aspect, so I found having someone to talk/vent to about it very useful.

Re: Procrastinatory Doom Loops

#242

Post by fire »

cik2e wrote: post #156
hfourm wrote: post #148

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Good stuff. I have lived with ADHD as long as I remember. Going on and off prescriptions. Adult ADHD has mostly revolved around depression/mood swing cycles of hyper focus and motivation (new interesting project/work, new job) and procrastination, lack of focus, and depression caused by that feeling of know I should be doing X but not being able to bring myself to. I have some coping techniques and it isn't something…

There are supplements that eliminate almost all of the negative side-effects of stims. - L-Tyrosine to keep your dopamine levels up. - ALCAR + ALA to reduce neurotoxicity and tolerance formation - Magnesium and Zinc for muscle tension, including jaw clenching if you're prone to that. And for Aderall, you can take Vitamin C at any point to rapidly flush it out of your system. These things are a game-changer for qualit…

Do you have any recs for where to buy ALA and ALCAR from? Reddit seems to recommend nootropicsdepot which I've honestly never heard of before today.

Re: Procrastinatory Doom Loops

#243

Post by projektfu »

fudged71 wrote: post #223
asxd wrote: post #44

I had this issue with my first software job right out of college. I was unproductive for weeks, just due to culture shock and (shamefully) malaise. The procrastination snowballed. Luckily a fellow engineer eventually noticed, sat down with me, and recognized exactly what was going on. In the kindest way possible, he sat down behind me and basically made me finally start my next project. He stayed there with me for th…

FYI this is called "Body Doubling" in the ADHD world, and there are services offering this.

I didn't know that. I once hired someone to do that but didn't know it had a term, or that it was common, or that you could find a service when you needed it.

Re: Procrastinatory Doom Loops

#244

Post by noduerme »

drakonka wrote: post #130
noduerme wrote: post #116

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm a non-eater (24-hr faster, usually this goes along with other manic, focused, driven episodes where I'm really being the best I can be at what I do). I lived for 10 yrs with my ex-gf (still my business partner and best friend) who used to have these worries about me, even though we were both working together. I was like don't worry about me, I'm fine -it was always she who needed to eat. She kind of put it onto m…

Thanks for sharing. I think in my case it's mostly like you and your ex-gf. I just have trouble internalizing the fact that I don't need to think about him while we're working. My boyfriend says he's totally fine sitting there not getting any attention when he knows we are in work mode. He _does_ have a higher requirement than what I was used to for spending quality time with each other in general, but it does not ex…

> But that is a me-problem vs a he-problem.

I mean, maybe it's not really a problem. It can be really hard to work and live with someone, and there's always a balance; we perceive that it might be rude to switch into work mode and ignore someone who we know wants to spend quality time, but we only care that it might be rude because we do want to spend quality time. We want these people in our life but we want them on certain terms, and that's okay. The boundaries always shift back and forth a little. As long as you're happy with the time you do give them, I think it's natural.

With my ex, we lived together; my current gf and I have separate places. But we quarantined together through most of 2020, and she was out of work. The pandemic really forced a lot of people who might not be so compatible in terms of their expectations for attention, work habits, sleeping and eating habits, into constant close quarters. Almost all of the unmarried couples I knew split up from 2020 to now (some more than once). I think my relationship has survived this long because we're both very aware of each other's needs - including the need for alone-time and boundaries.

Anyway, it's interesting to hear someone talk about it this way. I don't know too many people in parallel work-from-home/relationship situations. I guess it's really just about communication, and it sounds like you do have that in your relationship.

Re: Procrastinatory Doom Loops

#245

Post by medstrom »

romwell wrote: post #235
omginternets wrote: post #213

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I was recently diagnosed with ADHD. I am 34. Part of what took so long to get this diagnosed is that it is poorly named. I do not have a deficit of attention; in fact, I have extreme sustained attention [0]. If the symptoms described by the parent poster are causing you to suffer, please consider that it might be ADHD, and that ADHD does not necessarily manifest in the way it's name suggests it should. Please also co…

I could've written your comment word-for-word, to the extent that I did a double take and checked to make sure I didn't write it. Personally, I say that ADHD stands for Awfully Described Human Disorder for that exact reason. Many more thoughts on why it's poorly named here: https://romankogan.net/adhd/#Awfully%20Described%20Human%20D... (Someone complained I'm linking to my blog too much, but I haven't posted this li…

Don't worry about people, thanks for posting it, very much liked it.

Re: Procrastinatory Doom Loops

#246

Post by romwell »

300bps wrote: post #178
smoothpotato4 wrote: post #177

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Doing well at work is not an indication that you don’t have ADHD. Plenty of people with ADHD are perfectionists and overachievers, even those without medication. “Having a negative impact on your life” can be about more than just whether you perform well at work, it can be about how you feel about yourself and how you take care of yourself. I agree, medication is not always the answer. But that doesn’t mean it’s not…

Doing well at work is not an indication that you don’t have ADHD. Of course it is. Maybe if you changed "indication" to "guarantee" I would agree with you but as it is that sentence is objectively wrong. And of course there are other factors. I've definitely had symptoms of ADHD my entire life but once again that doesn't mean it rises to the level of a diagnosable disorder.

>>Doing well at work is not an indication that you don’t have ADHD.

>Of course it is. Maybe if you changed "indication" to "guarantee" I would agree with you but as it is that sentence is objectively wrong.

I'm sorry, but you are straight up spreading harmful falsehoods now. Please stop.

You clearly don't have the credentials/education, nor any sources to back your claims up.

(Signed, ADHD/math PhD/ex-Google/ex-Microsoft/etc)

Re: Procrastinatory Doom Loops

#247

Post by lifeplusplus »

tobr wrote: post #113

Something I’ve noticed is that the worst thing I can do, strangely enough, is to write the task down on my todo list. While it might make me feel good in the moment to take a minute to write it down (at least I’ve made some kind of progress, right?), it now poisons the entire todo list; I can’t bear to look at the list because I know it includes a task that I don’t want to think about.

100% ... I read somewhere to only think about just the next step.. Nothing more. And I did. No grand plans just what I'll do tomorrow. I was going great.. then I started to get ideas and I made a to-do list I haven't worked touched it in 4 days now... It's like mind is at limit of processing.. like on 2% battery you can get by on light work auto pilot but do something intensive it will shut down, which is try thinking about tasks in to do list why? Not sure but I think probably because I visit reddit, HN, other stuff daily and already have brain bucket full of things to think about... I'm not sure how doers type manage it

Re: Procrastinatory Doom Loops

#248

Post by omginternets »

medstrom wrote: post #245
romwell wrote: post #235

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I could've written your comment word-for-word, to the extent that I did a double take and checked to make sure I didn't write it. Personally, I say that ADHD stands for Awfully Described Human Disorder for that exact reason. Many more thoughts on why it's poorly named here: https://romankogan.net/adhd/#Awfully%20Described%20Human%20D... (Someone complained I'm linking to my blog too much, but I haven't posted this li…

Don't worry about people, thanks for posting it, very much liked it.

Same here. I really enjoyed it.

The 11 year old package provided some much needed laughter (partly at myself for having done similar things).

Re: Procrastinatory Doom Loops

#249

Post by omginternets »

cik2e wrote: post #156
hfourm wrote: post #148

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Good stuff. I have lived with ADHD as long as I remember. Going on and off prescriptions. Adult ADHD has mostly revolved around depression/mood swing cycles of hyper focus and motivation (new interesting project/work, new job) and procrastination, lack of focus, and depression caused by that feeling of know I should be doing X but not being able to bring myself to. I have some coping techniques and it isn't something…

There are supplements that eliminate almost all of the negative side-effects of stims. - L-Tyrosine to keep your dopamine levels up. - ALCAR + ALA to reduce neurotoxicity and tolerance formation - Magnesium and Zinc for muscle tension, including jaw clenching if you're prone to that. And for Aderall, you can take Vitamin C at any point to rapidly flush it out of your system. These things are a game-changer for qualit…

> And for Aderall, you can take Vitamin C at any point to rapidly flush it out of your system.

Is this legit? If so, that’s incredibly useful information! What’s the mechanism?

Re neurotoxicity, I believe you are mistaken that amphetamine salts are toxic. I believe this is the case with meth, but not pharmaceutical stims.

Re: Procrastinatory Doom Loops

#250

Post by omginternets »

randallsquared wrote: post #202
pbrb wrote: post #189

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Exactly the same for me. I'm currently in the "I know I should be doing X but not being able to bring myself to" cycle on a piece of a major project. It's not hard work, I know how to do it, but I just cannot do it. I was diagnosed with ADHD as a child, and have avoided the medication my whole life. Recently, I decided to try Adderall. It's like magic to be honest, and has helped tremendously in multiple ways. I can…

> It's like magic to be honest For nearly everyone, if I understand correctly, ADHD or no.

It’ll definitely stimulate everyone, adhd or no, but most people don’t have a brain fog that will be lifted by the meds. Nor do they have a plethora of other symptoms that amphetamine salts alleviate.
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