131–140 of 339 posts
Use your career/job to support your life, then get a life. Become an artist, author, clown, or build some awesome technical system because you want it to exist. GPL it. Don't ask for anything, especially not happiness, from your "career". I put it in quotes because it's conceptually bankrupt. https://www.roystonguest.com/blog/why-happiness-is-not-a-des...
And for those who are able, getting married and having children will tend to bring even more fulfillment than becoming a clown.
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No thanks. Belonging to a community and helping it grow is important for happiness. Community building (and empowering users) is the main point of copyleft. Permissive licenses are equivalent to unpaid labor in the eyes of SaaS companies and other freeloaders.
Worrying about > Permissive licenses are equivalent to unpaid labor in the eyes of SaaS companies and other freeloaders. Is a way to unhappiness. I MIT/BSD stuff and no worry about who uses it and how much money they make. The attitude above is like given to poor people at the sour kitchen and then getting angry if they make it out of poverty, become successful, and don't follow in your foot steps. What they do after…
If I want to build a community of people who upstream patches for a project, copyleft does it better than saying patches are not required.
MIT is like a soup kitchen because soup kitchens are like MIT. I don't want to work in a soup kitchen.
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Good podcast on the idea that it's scam that people are expecting happiness from their job: https://www.nytimes.com/2021/11/19/opinion/ezra-klein-podcas...
So Ezra Klein hates his job and tries to do as little of it as possible? It suspect it's not practicing what he's preaching
Seems like he's prioritizing something other than career at the moment?
Lots of good advice here. One additional thing to consider: why is your mind on stress from work? How’s your marriage? How are your parents doing? Your kids? Who are some of your best friends? How often are you physically active? Do you often go for walks, or play tennis, or garden? How well are you sleeping? Do you love your mattress? Any habits you’ve struggled to kick lately? Conversely, any hobbies you’ve really…
I just don't have any intention to fix it, because the fixes look difficult.
Use your career/job to support your life, then get a life. Become an artist, author, clown, or build some awesome technical system because you want it to exist. GPL it. Don't ask for anything, especially not happiness, from your "career". I put it in quotes because it's conceptually bankrupt. https://www.roystonguest.com/blog/why-happiness-is-not-a-des...
What if working with others and having an impact is what brings me the most fulfillment?
There are many food banks and code for america (and other country equivalents) that can use your help to impact your community.
The special thing I’ve done is mostly being willing to sit with hard questions like “who am I” and “what do I really want out of life and a job?”, sometimes for years at a time (low-key). The answer is always the same, and will probably always the same: I am motivated by mastery and autonomy. Thus I put lots of time into finding work that is interesting and has a lot to dig into. I routinely annoy the institutions I…
A couple years ago I watched "Avatar: The Last Airbender" for the first time, having skipped its original run.
When Uncle Iroh says to Zuko, "You need to start asking yourself the important questions, like _who am I?_, and _what do I want?_" it kinda hit me.
I don't have much of an identity and I spend a lot of time bored and aimless because all I want is to be happy and one day retire, which isn't short-term or specific enough to get me through the weekends.
I still don't know what I want, and that kinda sucks.
It is a curse of human condition. Never feeling 100% satisfied for any longer period of time
Is it really a curse? It is the motivation that drives you to change and become better after all.
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> why take on responsibility through having children? Why not pickup any other type of responsibilty? like, community service, tutoring/helping kids from less fortunate places or in the worst case even Picking up more responsibility from work? The other day I was flicking through my notepad in my home office and found hand written notes from my 6 year old daughter saying how much she loved me. Yes kids are a massive…
Imagine what happens when it doesn't go right with children and you're in this situation. I have a daughter who caught bacterial meningitis at birth and had to have a brain surgery to solve the infection. Her existence is tragic, she is with us but she is going to have a lifetime of challenges and we've already been through the ringer. Now ever day is like waking up with a mortal wound, and to have other kids who nee…
However, it's very humane to bring to other people's attention that their prospective children might not be healthy.
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For me, almost everything starts at my work. Not sure what's wrong with me, maybe I'm too engaged, maybe I feel too responsible for my job... But my actual well-being is almost 100% related to the work. I'm stressed almost all the time. Won't go into the details, just the management sucks big way. Long story short, after work (including weekends) I'm so tired that I need a lot of totally lazy time. I strive for activ…
Maybe it's time to look into hopping jobs? Maybe something with better work/life balance?
Alternatively, I could go work as a CNC operator – I have experience as turner / miller. That's worse pay and usually three-shift or four-crew work.
I tried to retrain. Got some online testing experience, and ISTQB FL papers. Didn't work out.
I'm going to set up a small CNC shop in the near future (2-3 months) – I'm working on it for half a year already and it's close.
Probably I should talk to some kind of therapist instead of writing such posts on Hacker News – while I don't mind personal stories when I read them, then when I'm an author I feel it doesn't belong here.
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As a twenty three year old. I'm curious to know more. why take on responsibility through having children? Why not pickup any other type of responsibilty? like, community service, tutoring/helping kids from less fortunate places or in the worst case even Picking up more responsibility from work? Is it more of a genetic thing where it makes the pain of responsibility more pleasurable? I'm even more curious to know if y…
> why take on responsibility through having children? Why not pickup any other type of responsibilty? like, community service, tutoring/helping kids from less fortunate places or in the worst case even Picking up more responsibility from work? The other day I was flicking through my notepad in my home office and found hand written notes from my 6 year old daughter saying how much she loved me. Yes kids are a massive…
35 is roughly the cutoff for "everything's going to be fine without much effort or thinking", so plan ahead.
That's when you're going to start getting help from fertility doctors, consider IVF, get test results showing that your own sperm's motility is not perfect (i.e. you've got a clock too), higher chances of Down syndrome, etc.
For some folks that's not a lot of time to get married, buy a house, a car, get a stable job and bring your financial situation in order. These aren't strict requirements, but the amount of stress involved when one of them is missing is something you'll have to handle, so at the very least you and your partner shouldn't be completely oblivious of the soft deadline at 35.