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Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

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Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#111

Post by xtracto »

endymi0n wrote: post #61

Facing a very similar issue and trying similar things unsuccessfully, I've found out lately with my coach that a more promising way to break out of the cycle of "wasting time" and beating myself up over it might be very counter-intuitive: Self-acceptance. I've found that acknowledging my need for relaxation and satisfying my curiosity was a solid first step in helping cure my addiction on a more fundamental level. Ch…

One aspect of that I think is related to "mindfulness ". Oftentimes we get to reddit/hn/twitter as a dumb reaction to a brain feeling. If we think of it explicitly, it's easier to control.

One technique that can also work is pomodoro: time 20 mins segments of the "productive" stuff, 3 of these segments separated by a 2 min break. Then reward with 15 min of reddit browsing.

It helped me hugely while writing my phd thesis. Which was very painful and prone to lots of distractions.

Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#112

Post by loa_in_ »

adwn wrote: post #78
Swizec wrote: post #33

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Or as Hamming says in his famous essay: He who works with a closed door is more productive today and tomorrow, but over time works on just slightly the wrong things to make an impact. But those with an open door are full of flitting and scattering and keep getting distracted, yet over time stay aligned with the field and are much more likely to do important work

It's a matter of balance. Too much "open door" mentality, and you'll never achieve anything that distinguishes you from the rest. You won't create a new trend if you're always chasing the latest trends.

I honestly think it's quite far fetched to connect the two - open door; and trendseeker.

Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#113

Post by thelastgallon »

> Breaking out of first person, this is getting really long. If you’ve figured out the secret to using your time well, let me know.

This was discussed recently: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=29149961

Understanding the patterns used to make these additive might help. A Survey of Addictive Software Design: https://digitalcommons.calpoly.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?refer...

Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#114

Post by Jensson »

Spare_account wrote: post #107
Jensson wrote: post #84

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I got diagnosed as an adult. Before then I spent my life being unable to put any time or energy into something for more than a few hours, and then I got bored and could never focus on that thing again. I couldn't do homework, I couldn't study for tests, I couldn't do much at all unless it was something hyper interesting that I could focus on it for a few hours before it became boring again. Even if I locked myself in…

Thanks for the reply. Was your initial approach "I think I have ADHD", or was the diagnosis a suprise to you?

I didn't think I had ADHD initially, I just assumed I was lazy and that everyone else just pushed through the mental challenges ADHD people has to deal with, but after a decade of nothing working I looked at the criteria again and realized it fit me. So then I went and directly asked to be tested for ADHD describing my symptoms. The science about ADHD isn't that good so sometimes you just got to do what I did, if you go in without an explicit goal chances are they wont find anything wrong with you or just try to treat the symptoms. Like I was depressed since trying to put so much effort and still failing to even focus was an extreme burden on my mental health, trying to treat that depression was hard, but now that I can focus most of that disappeared.

Edit: I think the biggest misconception about ADHD is the "the kid is loud in class, how do we make the kid stop being loud in class?" and thinking that disturbing class is the main problem the kid deals with. That was how ADHD started and what people know today is very biased in that direction, even among professionals. There seems to be very little information about ADHD and career prospects. Like lets say I want to build something, but my ADHD prevents me from building it, but with medication I can build it and I take pills to make that project into reality. That is what I care about, but most studies just look at how these pills improve kids behavior in class.

Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#115

Post by Jensson »

uyt wrote: post #99
psychstudio wrote: post #85

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Classical "variable reward". Manifests in all areas of life.

I wonder if there's an evolutionary reason for that preference or if this is just an edge case in our rewards system that never mattered until it became heavily exploited by other humans in the modern world.

I think it is a learning mechanism. The real world is very deterministic, if a process has seemingly random outcomes then most likely there is something about it you don't understand, so you repeat it over and over trying to make connections to understand why the different outcomes happens.

You can see this a lot in gambling addicts trying to find different ways to beat the system etc, trying to predict which number will appear (even though it isn't possible) and so on. Our brains just aren't made to deal with lotteries since lotteries isn't a thing found in nature. Some things looks like lotteries, some nuts might be bad after you open them so was a waste of time, but then you open many nuts and think hard trying to predict which nuts will be bad, and then you no longer need to open the bad ones saving you lots of work. But the artificial nuts are just random, there is no system to solve, so people just get stuck.

Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#116

Post by dan00 »

eloisius wrote: post #68
secondaryacct wrote: post #42

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Many of those I made were on weird dilletante times: I learned English because I wanted to read mangas earlier than their French translations, I learned CS because I just found it so fun I failed every other subjects in my first year of engineering school, I moved to Hong Kong because I fell in love with a girl here when in vacations, I joined an investment bank paying a lot because I had too much fun watching bloomb…

This rings true to me. Most of the best things in my life are the same. No big plan and then engineering the small pieces to build it. I've mostly followed the small pieces that drew me at the time. I'm aware that this approach could just as likely lead you to wasting your life on whimsy and end up with nothing, but I have to say I'm surprised with how well all the parts fit together for a pleasing whole. Looking bac…

> No big plan and then engineering the small pieces to build it. I've mostly followed the small pieces that drew me at the time. I'm aware that this approach could just as likely lead you to wasting your life on whimsy and end up with nothing, but I have to say I'm surprised with how well all the parts fit together for a pleasing whole.

In a way you’ve to be lucky that your interests are valued by the time and culture you’re living in, because you can’t control them. That might be the only difference of wasting your time or making it.

Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#117

Post by NewEntryHN »

hattmall wrote: post #58

The Hook with sites like Reddit, HN, etc is that they ARE addictive. Actually addictive in the sense of gambling. In gambling addiction the gamblers aren't addicted to winning, they are addicted to losing, or "almost winning". Now if they never ever won the addiction wouldn't form. If they ALWAYS won the addiction also wouldn't form. The old thing was email that people were addicted to checking because you MIGHT get…

> If they know they will get the reward then they know the exact opportunity cost and can weigh that against performing the behavior.

So you need to to randomize the value of the treat. Otherwise the dog knows the upper bound of the opportunity and the same reasoning applies.

Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#118

Post by boppo1 »

deltron3030 wrote: post #88

Why not keep "wasting time" but through a filter, like a different language? Language learning by immersion is a thing, and by consuming stuff you're drawn to (just in a different anguage) you're likely learning faster doing so.

Difficult to get over the initial curve. I'm attempting your suggestion lately.

Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#119

Post by beardedman »

To be a bit philosophical about it; I sometimes think that perhaps these sites are so addictive because they offer us an escape hatch from the loss of meaning (or passion) we have in our everyday lives. And so these sites are never the actual problem, but merely a symptom.

Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#120

Post by Foivos »

climb_stealth wrote: post #53
boppo1 wrote: post #43

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I spend on average[1] 4+ hours a day here, reddit or 4chan. I wish I had spent the time on other pursuits that I have consistently found more enjoyable and rewarding. 4chan in particular usually leaves me feeling some subtle mixture of mentally nauseous and despondent, although I laugh a lot and find interesting things I don't elsewhere. My over-browsing habit is absolutely an unhealthy and compulsive behavior. I'm 3…

> Interestingly, when I travel, my relationship with browsing changes. The feeling of "magnetic attention" (present even right now) is entirely absent and I lose interest after 5 minutes, max. Oh wow, interesting that you mention it because I experience the same. Can and do spend hours a day looking at random stuff on various forums / youtube / hn. But once I'm out traveling the need disappears and it just doesn't se…

Same here. My theory is that when travelling you are not bored, thus you have nothing to "escape" from.

The only problem with my theory is that this effect (ie. not wasting time) lasts a couple of days after returning from a trip. This should not happen because you are in the same context as when you were liberally wasting time.

I also move countries a lot. The first 1-2 months at a new country I am wasting time significantly less compared to when I have settled.

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