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Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

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101–110 of 179 posts

Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#101
post #91

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> In gambling addiction the gamblers aren't addicted to winning, they are addicted to losing, or "almost winning". I disagree. I remember my DotA addiction, I wasn't addicted to losing or "almost winning", if anything I was addicted to "almost losing". Stomping the enemy wasn't fun, getting stomped wasn't fun, almost winning but losing in the end was VERY not fun, almost losing but winning in the end was a huge high,…

It's not about fun, it's about what kind of activities cause addiction. You were addicted because when you played there was a chance of getting a high, but it wasn't certain. A certain high would not be as addictive, if at all.

No, it is about both. If you don't have anything you want to do then everything with any fun elements at all become "addictive". Removing those "addictive" activities from such a person wont help them at all, it just makes their life more boring and they will take it up as soon as you give it back since they have nothing else to do.

Some people have problems with addictive activities. But lots of people just do it since they lack alternatives. If you try to fix the second as if they were addicted then it will all feel frustrating and hopeless since you aren't addressing a real problem.

Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#102

If only you didn't waste your time playing games! You'd be able to afford a Ferrari by now! So do you play games? Of course not. So, where's your Ferrari?

Point taken, but the opportunity cost of a heavy game addition is plausibly six or seven figures, depending on the person's other skills and goals.

A twenty something wasting 5 hours is wasting future benefits of using that. The opportunity cost is horrendous. Multiples of any later hourly rate because of how early its wasted.

Addiction is often poor social connections and relationships. That's why isolation is so dangerous. Most addictions thrive in people who have poor interconnections with others. This isn't the only factor but its a big one. People operate better in tribes or groups of connected people.

Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#103
post #43

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I spend on average[1] 4+ hours a day here, reddit or 4chan. I wish I had spent the time on other pursuits that I have consistently found more enjoyable and rewarding. 4chan in particular usually leaves me feeling some subtle mixture of mentally nauseous and despondent, although I laugh a lot and find interesting things I don't elsewhere. My over-browsing habit is absolutely an unhealthy and compulsive behavior. I'm 3…

> Interestingly, when I travel, my relationship with browsing changes. The feeling of "magnetic attention" (present even right now) is entirely absent and I lose interest after 5 minutes, max. Oh wow, interesting that you mention it because I experience the same. Can and do spend hours a day looking at random stuff on various forums / youtube / hn. But once I'm out traveling the need disappears and it just doesn't se…

The Secret Life of Walter Mitty explores this. I recommend everyone to watch it.

Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#105
post #43

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I spend on average[1] 4+ hours a day here, reddit or 4chan. I wish I had spent the time on other pursuits that I have consistently found more enjoyable and rewarding. 4chan in particular usually leaves me feeling some subtle mixture of mentally nauseous and despondent, although I laugh a lot and find interesting things I don't elsewhere. My over-browsing habit is absolutely an unhealthy and compulsive behavior. I'm 3…

> Interestingly, when I travel, my relationship with browsing changes. The feeling of "magnetic attention" (present even right now) is entirely absent and I lose interest after 5 minutes, max. Oh wow, interesting that you mention it because I experience the same. Can and do spend hours a day looking at random stuff on various forums / youtube / hn. But once I'm out traveling the need disappears and it just doesn't se…

Same here.

I’ve been thinking it’s a sort of “escape from the void”. When there’s nothing that particularly needs focus, there’s a feeling of wanting to escape from the discomfort of the silence. When I truly have no plans, I find myself seeking out lots of cheap fillers - HN, reddit, snacks.

As Blaise Pascal said, “ All of humanity's problems stem from man's inability to sit quietly in a room alone”.

The question is why? Why is it so hard to sit quietly in a room alone? What exactly is it that we’re trying to escape?

Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#106
post #91

The Hook with sites like Reddit, HN, etc is that they ARE addictive. Actually addictive in the sense of gambling. In gambling addiction the gamblers aren't addicted to winning, they are addicted to losing, or "almost winning". Now if they never ever won the addiction wouldn't form. If they ALWAYS won the addiction also wouldn't form. The old thing was email that people were addicted to checking because you MIGHT get…

> In gambling addiction the gamblers aren't addicted to winning, they are addicted to losing, or "almost winning". I disagree. I remember my DotA addiction, I wasn't addicted to losing or "almost winning", if anything I was addicted to "almost losing". Stomping the enemy wasn't fun, getting stomped wasn't fun, almost winning but losing in the end was VERY not fun, almost losing but winning in the end was a huge high,…

That's why I try not playing competitive video games anymore.

Matchmaking is set up so that you have a 50/50 win/loss rate. When you take into consideration all the outcomes you mentioned, maybe 1/20 games was fulfilling.

Not to mention the "can't quit on a loss, can't quit on a winning streak" mentality.

Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#107
post #84

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Asking as an adult that increasingly suspects he may be undiagnosed ADHD: Did the diagnosis result in being prescribed a treatment? If so, what, and has it helped? I'm conscious that each case must be handled individually, and whatever happened with your diagnosis/treatment would not be the same with me, but I'm interested to hear nonetheless from anyone that's willing to share.

I got diagnosed as an adult. Before then I spent my life being unable to put any time or energy into something for more than a few hours, and then I got bored and could never focus on that thing again. I couldn't do homework, I couldn't study for tests, I couldn't do much at all unless it was something hyper interesting that I could focus on it for a few hours before it became boring again. Even if I locked myself in…

Thanks for the reply.

Was your initial approach "I think I have ADHD", or was the diagnosis a suprise to you?

Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#108
post #106
post #91

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> In gambling addiction the gamblers aren't addicted to winning, they are addicted to losing, or "almost winning". I disagree. I remember my DotA addiction, I wasn't addicted to losing or "almost winning", if anything I was addicted to "almost losing". Stomping the enemy wasn't fun, getting stomped wasn't fun, almost winning but losing in the end was VERY not fun, almost losing but winning in the end was a huge high,…

That's why I try not playing competitive video games anymore. Matchmaking is set up so that you have a 50/50 win/loss rate. When you take into consideration all the outcomes you mentioned, maybe 1/20 games was fulfilling. Not to mention the "can't quit on a loss, can't quit on a winning streak" mentality.

> Not to mention the "can't quit on a loss, can't quit on a winning streak" mentality.

Yeah, I've spent 12 straight hours (on a workday, no less) playing because of that. Fuck that game.

Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#109
the train of thought i usually get on when i start thinking about using a screen time tracking app or some app that helps you change your habits, is that we supposedly have the most complex brains in the known universe so its kind of embarrassing that i should even need something like an app to help me. usually that and the amount of effort and maintenance involved is enough motivation for me to stop whatever stupid shit I'm doing

Re: Scattered thoughts on why I waste my own time

#110
post #28

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This kind of thing works to begin with at least.. when that browser plugin in chrome stops me opening HN after 1hour it interrupts the impulse to browse, but then I can alway just open Firefox.. Limits outside ones control are best.. it's amazing how uninteresting youtube is when your data is rate limited.

Use a network level solution and don’t do a 1h block. Do a 365 day block to begin with. We’re like those rats with the cocaine button we keep pressing unless you can somehow disable it and go do something else with your time.

Is a hosts file network level? It didn't stop me unfortunately.
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