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Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

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Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#71

Post by monocasa »

rsj_hn wrote: post #65
TMWNN wrote: post #64

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yes, I've wondered the same thing. Anti-sexual harassment training, and more broadly the discouraging of socialization between men and women, has also reduced the opportunity for men and women to marry. The flip side of the male executive no longer being able to chase his secretary around a desk to try to pinch her on the butt is another executive not being able to politely court the secretary he is in love with (and…

More and more, I'm beginning to think that a society in which there is widespread use of birth control and in which the majority of women enter the labor force and work full time in an office is not going to be able to maintain replacement level fertility rates. In which case, the future belongs to societies where women don't work and birth control is stigmatized. It could be that there is a reason why the world was…

Eh, Rome had widespread use of abortifacients, only falling after they had harvested those plants into extinction.

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#72

Post by bduerst »

988747 wrote: post #44
mensetmanusman wrote: post #33

This will be kind of skewed towards the wealthy, as marriages are becoming less obtainable by the lower classes.

A theory I once read goes like this: in the past it was quite common for lawyers, directors, managers to marry their secretaries, which was the way for them to jump to higher social class. Now, a director making advances towards their secretary faces immediate sexual harassment lawsuit, so they choose to marry other managers/directors instead.

Is that really a bad thing though?

For the 1/10 times at work where the person in power ends up having a meaningful relationship with an underling that you lose, you also have the 9/10 cases of sexual harassment that you lose too.

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#73

Post by NikolaNovak »

bedobi wrote: post #66

I'm a software developer. I don't know about the rest of the community but for me someone being in tech is, if not a disqualifier, something very close to it. I have no real reason or justification! I guess maybe I'm just techy enough as is and prefer other qualities in a partner.

I once dated a lovely beautiful nerdy funny intelligent successful software engineer.

Our first five dates were awesome. So much agreement and joy and commonality. Instant connection and camaraderie.

Further on we realized we didn't bring enough to relationship. We didn't want the"gender I'm attracted version of myself". We each wanted somebody to bring new perspectives, challenge us in ways that work and nerdy friends don't, to talk about not work after work, or at least different work, etc. Ultimately even somebody to disagree with us.

After a few similar experiences, it's not that I ever actively avoided a software engineer partner, it's just that they never seemed to last long. Love of my life is English major with career in retail and home depot / Canadian tire store manager. She brings softer , more emotionally intelligent, people oriented side to our family. I'm the annoying pedantic literal obsessive nerdy one :-D. Works well!

Edit : All of my close developer friends are similarly married to arts major types. Interestingly, I now realize, great many of my acquaintance developer friends have nerdy or techu partners. Wonder what variables are at place but definitely to each their own!

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#74

Post by smnrchrds »

chrisseaton wrote: post #67
screye wrote: post #22

Many anecdotal guesses are validated by this data. Doctors and agricultural workers are the obvious standouts, but I see a few more too. Us programmers stick together. Quite a high rate of marrying within the community. Lawyers show a similarly high number. A criticism of the study, is that it does not normalize by how many of these professions are in the general population. So, it appears as though software analysts…

> it appears as though software analysts don't like intermarrying What happened to 'software analysts'? Is that even a career today? Sounds like something straight out of the 80s. Is it a 'product owner'? But the real explanation is that realistically 90% of people meet their spouses in university.

You have to be a 'Computer Systems Analyst' to be eligible for TN status.

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#75

Post by MonaroVXR »

withinboredom wrote: post #46
asimpletune wrote: post #7

I was not surprised to see that programmers marry other programmers

I actually married a hairstylist. It turns out, a lot about programming and cutting hair are similar. She has to understand the requirements and implement it exactly right, the first time. I also learned that bartering is alive and well in that world. People would trade all kinds of things for a haircut that they didn’t have to tell their spouse how much it cost: vacation rentals, private box concert tickets, sailing…

Stupid question, what is a high-end salon?

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#76

Post by monocasa »

foxbarrington wrote: post #45
wanderingmind wrote: post #35

Earlier quoted context omitted.

There is a difference between wedding and marriage. A wedding paperwork is not too expensive, but a marriage has truly become unaffordable.

What is expensive about marriage? I’m trying to think of reasons. Taxes? It can be advantageous to stay single, but I wouldn’t say this is that big. Kids? Another mouth to feed and educate is wildly expensive, but I doubt this is what we’re talking about. Rent/buying a home? Cheaper to share a space I’d think. I think I’m missing something.

At least on the income tax side too, you're allowed to file seperately even if you're married.

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#77

Post by bumby »

beerandt wrote: post #56
screye wrote: post #22

Many anecdotal guesses are validated by this data. Doctors and agricultural workers are the obvious standouts, but I see a few more too. Us programmers stick together. Quite a high rate of marrying within the community. Lawyers show a similarly high number. A criticism of the study, is that it does not normalize by how many of these professions are in the general population. So, it appears as though software analysts…

Except many couples meet in school, where they'd be exposed to a disproportionate number of potential spouses within their own field of study, and maybe to a lesser extent others in related programs within the same college. Which would also be skewed by things like length of study and personality types attracted to particular interests. Eg, Doctors and lawyers often don't want to get married until after school, at wh…

I’ve read that one reason wealth inequality is worse today is because high-education-high-income individuals want to marry other HEHI individuals whereas in the past this wasn’t the case. If the claim about the past is true, it seems to undermine your point

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#78

Post by Rebelgecko »

xhevahir wrote: post #70

I'd be interested to see a historical comparison. Supposedly the (male)doctor-marries-(female)nurse pattern of several decades ago--or the executive/secretary one, to give another example--has given way to a situation where Americans tend to marry within their own profession/class.

I think the # of female doctors has grown much more quickly than the # of male nurses (IIRC most medical students are women now). It would be interesting to compare stats by gender- does a male software engineer marry differently than a female one?

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#79

Post by monocasa »

neogodless wrote: post #51
peanut_worm wrote: post #41

Earlier quoted context omitted.

How so? There isn’t much paperwork and you will save on taxes.

> you will save on taxes ... if you pair a high earner with a low/no earner

You'll never do worse than when you were single since you can always file seperately.

Re: Which jobs most often pair together among married couples

#80

Post by toast0 »

TMWNN wrote: post #63
llimos wrote: post #53

When I was at university, Engineering and Psychology used to have parties together. But that might also have been because Engineering was 80% men and Psychology 80% women.

I'm told that Milwaukee School of Engineering began a nursing program to even out the male-female ratio. https://np.reddit.com/r/todayilearned/comments/6onyh6/til_th... >

I gradumated from there... This is like the first time seeing its name here.

I'm not sure I saw any nursing students while there. All of the students I knew were in the engineering program, or had started there and moved to the business program (often as an intermediate step before dropping out)

Biomedical engineering seemed to have the least skewed ratio when I attended... But it's also really fing hard.

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