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I just don’t want to be busy anymore
31–40 of 463 posts
Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore
#32Earlier quoted context omitted.
Typed on my phone. Six hours of work? Lie the other 2 and call it a day. Or, renegotiate a contract for 6 hours per day. Given how much productivity I presume you bring, I’d lie. I don’t feel bad about it since companies care too little (in general). If they care, then I would care. E.g. a 10x more productive engineer doesn’t get 10x the pay. I met one of these people, they lied. They worked 2 hours, shipped one hour…
Part of the problem is that I'm a Software Engineer as well as a Business Analyst and Project Manager. I'm also managing a dev team, so it's really difficult to only work 6 hours a day. Hell, I can't even do all my work in a 40 hour work week. Yes, I realize this isn't a me issue and I'm looking for other work. The problem is that I'm encountering a lot of ageism in this field too.
I'd probably be as wiped out of I had the responsibility of three roles.
Have you considered finding something else?
Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore
#33> “No way I’m burned out. Look at all the women that are actually suffering. Who am I but a privileged white chic taking up space.”
It’s sad that so many white people have been conditioned to think this way.
Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore
#34As a 54 year old Software Engineer, who has had a nice IT career for over 26 years, I'm spent. This is coming from someone who has always had a growth mindset and had a really hard time sitting still. I used to loathe naps and felt like I was missing out if I took one. Now, I take a one hour nap almost daily and I'm finding that after 1pm I'm basically fried (I start working around 7AM). I'm not sure what to do about…
Im in a different field but I too have felt similarly.
I would suggest a couple of things:
- see a psychologist (not a psychiatrist, athough a psychiatrist may be step later on) - this should help you develop tools to make yourself better
- dont take work home, stop when you are tired - i saw that you fulfill multiple roles, could some of that be delegated? are you being compensated for those roles or did they just pile on over time? maybe its time to talk to your boss about it…
- take a real vacation, as in stay home and dont do anything
- excersize, avoid alcohol/substances
Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore
#35As a 54 year old Software Engineer, who has had a nice IT career for over 26 years, I'm spent. This is coming from someone who has always had a growth mindset and had a really hard time sitting still. I used to loathe naps and felt like I was missing out if I took one. Now, I take a one hour nap almost daily and I'm finding that after 1pm I'm basically fried (I start working around 7AM). I'm not sure what to do about…
My psychologist urged me to listen to my body. If you find you haven't got an 8 hour day in you, do what you can in less and stop pretending.
Spend part of every day outside. Spend part of every week in the company of others.
I too was very concerned about if I could "stop" and worried about my mojo and work ethic which went missing around 10 years ago. You learn to cope, and I read enough financial investment advice to realize I need less than I feared post work, but probably I won't entirely retire: moving to a different intensity of work is the goal probably.
It helps to live in an economy with a public health service. Moving country in these times is hard, moving country also breaks social ties which are really important in older age but mid-50s you can make bridges to a new community. So, if you are in a place where health costs will be a major concern, think about international relocation. The longer you leave it the less likely it is to work.
Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore
#36One of the things which quickly overwhelms me is just all the little stuff. Couple big ticket items? No problem. Long list of 5-20 minute items, or even worse, conversations of indefinite length? Exhausting.
Sorry to be that guy, but it's funny to me Seneca identified this exact thing thousands of years ago. He said something like, we must not take on tasks which are not so much huge as generate a proliferation of smaller tasks.
Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore
#37"Adulthood in the modern age is just telling yourself 'next week won't be so bad'. Over and over. Until you die"
Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore
#38As a 54 year old Software Engineer, who has had a nice IT career for over 26 years, I'm spent. This is coming from someone who has always had a growth mindset and had a really hard time sitting still. I used to loathe naps and felt like I was missing out if I took one. Now, I take a one hour nap almost daily and I'm finding that after 1pm I'm basically fried (I start working around 7AM). I'm not sure what to do about…
With all due respect, saying you're 54 isn't enough context. The past 18 months have been a lot . For everybody, in and out of tech. Knowing you've been in tech longer than most helps sell... what? that you're more deserving of being tired that the rest of us? (Not rowdy invalid, there is an official retirement age after all...) But shit, the new iPhone came out and all I could hear was how much I don't want to wait…
What a bizarre takeaway from what I said.
Saying I'm 54 and have had a 26+ year career in tech was MY context for feeling spent.
Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore
#39It's very hard to disentangle how much of this is pressure from your workplace vs. your internalized sense of obligation about work intensity. Parenthood does change a lot of things. But at the end of the day, tech isn't slinging drinks at a bar, or fixing cars, or even like other intense white collar jobs where the stock market closing bell or potential sales target companies office hours put hard time limits on thi…
This is why I loved converting to a contractor. Completely flips the dynamic.
Instead of an employer/boss relationship - I now view them as a customer/client.
My decision making and priorities are to better MY business - not theirs.
Etc.
Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore
#40Earlier quoted context omitted.
Typed on my phone. Six hours of work? Lie the other 2 and call it a day. Or, renegotiate a contract for 6 hours per day. Given how much productivity I presume you bring, I’d lie. I don’t feel bad about it since companies care too little (in general). If they care, then I would care. E.g. a 10x more productive engineer doesn’t get 10x the pay. I met one of these people, they lied. They worked 2 hours, shipped one hour…
Part of the problem is that I'm a Software Engineer as well as a Business Analyst and Project Manager. I'm also managing a dev team, so it's really difficult to only work 6 hours a day. Hell, I can't even do all my work in a 40 hour work week. Yes, I realize this isn't a me issue and I'm looking for other work. The problem is that I'm encountering a lot of ageism in this field too.
have you thought about joining Government? pretty laid back there. Less pay, but if you are okay with that, its worth it if you value time > money