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The vital art of talking to strangers

economist.com

21–30 of 290 posts

Re: The vital art of talking to strangers

#21

I have a hypothesis that almost all of the US's current cultural problems would be solved if once a month we all cooked and shared a meal with another randomly chosen family.

That sounds like fun.

Although I hope you are ready to meet lots of Christians and a few alcoholics every year. Just remember that the 90% doesn't like talking about their jobs. Hope you know the latest sportsball news...

That being said, there's usually other commonalities to discuss.

Re: The vital art of talking to strangers

#22
post #13

You can say you don't enjoy interacting with strangers, but I realize you should realize that you're taking the time to comment on an anonymous social platform. Even if you're just reading the comments, you're listening to what strangers have to say

The difference is choosing to engage or closing the web page. Plus, I have no problem talking with programmers about their jobs and hobbies. Compare that to talking to a program manager who's hobbies are comic book related... I'm not sure what to talk about with them... Maybe virtue vs hedonist philosophy? (They do comic books, they are clearly hedonists)

> They do comic books, they are clearly hedonists

Are comics significantly more hedonistic than other media? (I'm genuinely asking; I've never been interested in comics but I've also never heard that they were all that different from other entertainment media.)

Re: The vital art of talking to strangers

#24
post #17

Perhaps the problem with social media is that it’s not social. It’s actually oratorical media. In a physically social setting, people do the thing the article quotes: they recognize that interaction with diametrically opposing viewpoints is possible if they exercise tact to eschew controversy until having built common ground. That isn’t possible at scale because there is no common ground at scale. And online, everyth…

Totally agree. Even without the opposition, there's a similar issue about having vulnerable conversations. I had a buddy over last night and he relayed an experience he had in NYC a few weeks ago. He was at a bar and saw this guy that just looked like he was in a bad place. He debated for a while whether or not to say anything but ultimately decided to break the ice and offer him a drink. The guy said he had to pace…

A fascinating story. Thank you for sharing. I love these tales of human interaction. The thing I find surprising is that if you stop and interact with random people, you'll have a plethora of these kinds of stories.

That is, they sound rare, but in reality they are super common. And the only thing stopping you experiencing them is playing the odds.

Re: The vital art of talking to strangers

#25

Yeah, talking to strangers is not a thing in my country. Can't say I care for it.

I highly doubt this is true of any country. All countries are full of humans.

Anyone making this claim has a severe sampling problem. If you personally don’t talk to people, you can be under the impression that nobody talks to people. The people that do talk to people can read signs for who wants to talk and they talk to each other.

The false impression is further reinforced if you go outside the country because as a foreigner people are more likely to talk to you, offer help, etc.

Your evidence would be stronger if you were a person who did care to talk to people but found that in a certain country nobody replied.

Re: The vital art of talking to strangers

#26

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The difference is choosing to engage or closing the web page. Plus, I have no problem talking with programmers about their jobs and hobbies. Compare that to talking to a program manager who's hobbies are comic book related... I'm not sure what to talk about with them... Maybe virtue vs hedonist philosophy? (They do comic books, they are clearly hedonists)

> They do comic books, they are clearly hedonists Are comics significantly more hedonistic than other media? (I'm genuinely asking; I've never been interested in comics but I've also never heard that they were all that different from other entertainment media.)

It could be argued that HN, news, and Reddit are less hedonist because they provide education.

Although, my long term plan is to eliminate those in favor of non fiction books and personal projects.

The best "pro comic book" argument I've heard is that science fiction can help you consider potential futures of humanity. This can reduce being surprised by biotechnology and AI events. This could help humanity vote better and make more ethical software. (or so the argument goes)

Re: The vital art of talking to strangers

#27

I have a hypothesis that almost all of the US's current cultural problems would be solved if once a month we all cooked and shared a meal with another randomly chosen family.

That sounds like fun. Although I hope you are ready to meet lots of Christians and a few alcoholics every year. Just remember that the 90% doesn't like talking about their jobs. Hope you know the latest sportsball news... That being said, there's usually other commonalities to discuss.

> Although I hope you are ready to meet lots of Christians and a few alcoholics every year.

Always good to lump the Christians in with the alcoholics.

Re: The vital art of talking to strangers

#28

I have a hypothesis that almost all of the US's current cultural problems would be solved if once a month we all cooked and shared a meal with another randomly chosen family.

That sounds like fun. Although I hope you are ready to meet lots of Christians and a few alcoholics every year. Just remember that the 90% doesn't like talking about their jobs. Hope you know the latest sportsball news... That being said, there's usually other commonalities to discuss.

Even as a non christian I find your lack of tact pretty uninteresting.

Re: The vital art of talking to strangers

#29

I have a hypothesis that almost all of the US's current cultural problems would be solved if once a month we all cooked and shared a meal with another randomly chosen family.

yeah, and please talk about social issues and that you have a partner of the same sex! just like in family meals that's going to go down super well! /s

Re: The vital art of talking to strangers

#30
post #18

For awhile Sweden had Call a Random Swede https://www.theswedishnumber.com/ where if you called the number, you would literally be paired with a random Swede to talk about whatever you want.

That. Is awesome. Sorry I missed it!

Isn't it an app for that??
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