Why Can’t I Sleep?

I'm sorry you’re going through this, I recognize it.. actually it's the first time I see someone else explaining the sinking and lack of 'click'. I’ve struggled for 2 years, but am slowly doing better now. I can tell you more if you'd like but I don't want to flood this thread.

[shortened backstory]

- Always had normal sleep, even in stressfull times - 2 years ago, over the span of a few days my sleep went away: from 5 to 3 to 0 hrs. I then was awake for 2 days. And after that only slept max 3 hours for ages (nearly a year). - I couldn’t take naps - I lost all my energy (could hardly walk for 15), thinking etc - had to chase after specialists to check things, and correct them on their assumptions... which was emotionally exhaustive. - It led to them seeing symptoms of an endless list of possible causes, but they never found a culprit. - One hypothesis was that I was struggling with the results of a virus, and basically was left with all kinds of damage. - I was constantly asked about / advised on bed / food / daily routines, even though mine were identical to their advice (perfect) going into this, and I had been stress free.

[ on improvement ]

+ It’s hard to say if it helped me improve my sleep, since I continued to struggle, but a very strict (though fairly standard) bed routine did make me feel more in control: * same time to bed every day, pre-bed routine of stretching the body, cooling my hands and feet, while in bed stretching the face muscles and ‘yawning’ * no exciting media or social meeting / discussions in the evening (or close to bed time) * using an app to play the same comforting / funny podcast every night, and having it fade out after a set time (the Ricky Gervais show / pilkboys yt channel) * For a while I developed my own meditation routine in bed

+ asked people to not ask about my sleep, just how I’m doing + be very open, forward, non apologetic about your condition + there might have been an influence of some gut problems I had, which were eventually treated by antibiotics + I’ve been prescribed temazepam and diazepam to at least calm my body down, and it made me feel closer to sinking into sleep – but never really went all the way. I got semi addicted to them, and hated the desperation I had to at least have some control over my body. After I got off them, and my twitches had declined, I only used temazepam if im on my way to a second sleepless night in a row. So I don’t reach for them on th occasional setback, but I’m glad they are there if it escalates.

+ I focus on daily activities, and excused myself from existential worries + I’m now up to 5 / 6 hours on a night, not necessarily of quality, but I don’t feel terrible every day

No caffeine after 2pm here, exercise 3 times a week and 2x daily dog walks. No phone or devices after 9pm, bed at 11:30 and out of bed at 8:15 7 days a week (thanks dog). I still go through multi week long stints of lack of sleep, grogginess, general unpleasantness in the mornings until 12-12:30.

Generalizing that everyone has terrible habits is ridiculous, it's the equivalent of telling someone who is suffering from depression they just need to exercise to feel better, or someone who is obese to just "eat less"

I'm not telling anybody anything. I'm saying a lot of people with bad sleep, including most of the ones I've met, have terrible sleep habits. Just like a lot of people are fat because they have bad diets. If you're unable to walk or have some metabolism issue, that can make it really hard to stay slim. For you, perhaps you have an undiagnosed sleep issue (in which case seeing a sleep doctor would be helpful); but your experience does nothing to change the fact that other people have poor sleep for no reason but their poor choices.

The other side of this equation that isn't talked about as much is "actually getting rest when you sleep".

A problem that became worse for me over the years was "sleeping but still being tired". This manifested for me when I started falling asleep at my desk at work, or in the middle of a conversation while I sat down.

I did all the regular things, bed same time everyday, less/no caffeine, I would even workout when I got a "sleepy spell" figuring it was downtime?

I finally saw a neurologist, got a sleep study, turned out I had restless leg syndrome. Basically running marathons in my sleep! I take a pill, and things are vastly improved.

Hey, I have this really bad. Around 7-8pm I feel like I want someone to pull on my legs hard and they get an antsy feeling where I cannot keep them still. When I then go to bed, my legs kick and jerk , my wife has complained about me actually kicking her in the shins and drawing blood from my toenails.

I have heard of medication, such as Dopamine agonists, but got concerned they might have other side effects.

May I ask what your Dr has prescribed to you>?