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My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

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Re: My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

#742
post #587

Earlier quoted context omitted.

And an abused boy could well become an abuser in the future. Sad but true Are you talking sexual abuse? If so, then references please. There are a lot of ways that abuse goes down the generations. For example girls who were abused are more likely to get together with abusive men as adults. But I've encountered zero evidence that victims of pedophiles are particularly likely to become pedophiles themselves when they g…

I just did some research. To me I always hear pedophiles themselves admitting that they were abused when they were children. for example here https://core.ac.uk/download/pdf/72050039.pdf https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/2082860/ but both of the studies says that the self reports are questionable.

Yes, those self-reports are very highly questionable.

First of all, we all rework our childhood memories to better fit our adult personas. Depressed people talk about all of the terrible things that happened to them as kids which make them depressed now. Happy people, all of the happy things that happened that make them happy now. A gay man might talk about wearing dresses and playing with dolls that made him gay.

But attempts to corroborate current stories with past events (the gold standard being longitudinal studies) find that none of that is true. Happy and depressed people have the usual mix of happy and sad childhood events, they just remember them selectively. The gay man's twin brother says maybe he wore a dress once, and has made a mountain out of a molehill. And so on.

Pedophiles are even worse. Pedophiles have the problem that they fall in love with children, and have to gaslight themselves into believing that they do no harm by having sex with the child. Under this pressure, pedophiles make up memories out of whole cloth.

However in general, we have not found any correlation between what actually happened to you before puberty, and who you wind up sexually attracted to after. We can't predict whether you'll be straight. Whether you'll be gay. Or whether you'll be a pedophile. Which means that if you were the unfortunate target of a pedophile, there is no particular reason to believe that have anything other than the 1% risk that every boy does of growing up into one.

Re: My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

#743

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Being held to account for your false accusations is not "tone policing", so please stop gaslighting. I didn't write that women are "more emotional". I wrote they are generally "more emotionally vulnerable". It's irresponsible to make extremely harsh accusations against someone when the analysis that the accusation is based on is sloppy and low-effort. And as an aside, claiming that women are generally more emotional…

Let me suggest this then. Post your initial reply to a forum with a lot of women and ask if they find it misogynistic. Adults can "read between the lines". Putting all your statements together draws a perfectly clear misogynistic narrative. No amount of deflection by trying to rebrand each point individually will make that go anyway.

I don't have time to run that experiment, and that wouldn't prove anything any way. Opinion polls don't tell us what the truth is about anything except opinions.

There is no misogynistic narrative between the lines. That misogynists would exploit the facts I am presenting to push their narrative does not make me uttering those facts misogynistic.

We cannot avoid certain ideas and discussions out of fear that bad people will incorporate them into the narrative they use to push their agenda. Their narrative has to be countered by presenting factual arguments, not by avoidance of discussion and suppression of facts.

Re: My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

#744

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Asking for that doesn't take away the fact you decided to focus on how the victim's parents could have prevented that instead of focusing on the crime itself. It's an indirect way of blaming the victim instead of the accuser. We see this all the time when women get killed and someone says "we have to tell people it's not safe to go around alone at night". First, let's try to fix the real issue and then we can focus o…

If you want to suggest this wasn't the forum to bring up the topic of parents discussing sexual situations with their children then, fine, I'll concede to that. I believe the subjects of parents educating their children can coincide with how to stop predatory behavior, but I'm willing to accept the desire to discuss them separately. However, to suggest I'm blaming the victim is the epitome of putting words in my mout…

Imagine for a moment your daughter was the one in this situation. She decides to share her experience and the first comment you see is "parents need to be better at teaching their kids about sex". How would you feel?

Re: My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

#745
post #615

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Projared, a game review channel on youtube was falsely accused of being a child predator by a bunch of kids who coordinated to destroy him on discord. Those kids provided fabricated "evidence" and managed to destroy Projared's growth, get their channel booted of their network, and destroyed their business relationships with their sponsors and other partners. All this because of the mentality that multiple parties can…

Every example provided so far has been kids/teenagers who were part of a group (high school, discord, etc..) These are grown intelligent women with no connection. I'm not saying it's impossible they are lying, just improbable.

Adults are obviously better at lying than kids are, due to having more experience.

Re: My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

#746

Earlier quoted context omitted.

https://reason.com/2018/10/17/seneca-valley-mean-girls-false... https://www.post-gazette.com/opinion/editorials/2018/10/15/A...

Both of these cases were high school situations, a typically traumatizing environment, with immature teenaged people. I'm sorry, I do not see the same likelihood of collusion in this case of intelligent women who had no relation to each other. I am not saying it is impossible, but I have a hard time seeing it.

And UVA rape scandal? Or was that just a college situation, with immature post-adolescent people?

Re: My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

#748

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Both of these cases were high school situations, a typically traumatizing environment, with immature teenaged people. I'm sorry, I do not see the same likelihood of collusion in this case of intelligent women who had no relation to each other. I am not saying it is impossible, but I have a hard time seeing it.

And UVA rape scandal? Or was that just a college situation, with immature post-adolescent people?

I think collusion among people who did not know each other at all is unlikely.

Re: My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

#749

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> then the women need to be treated like children and protected. Mate, no. This applies to men, women, nonbinary folks, non-human animals, etc. Literally any living thing. If you don't consent, anyone having sex with you is wrong. It's wrong if a man tries to have sex with a drunk, non-consenting person, and it's wrong if a women tries to have sex with a drunk, non-consenting person. This is the _opposite_ of making…

By non-consenting do you mean says no or didn't say yes?

non-consenting means not actively choosing the activity. Words or their absence are evidence from which someone might infer consent, but do not define it.

Re: My experience with sexual harassment in the Scala community

#750

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Let me suggest this then. Post your initial reply to a forum with a lot of women and ask if they find it misogynistic. Adults can "read between the lines". Putting all your statements together draws a perfectly clear misogynistic narrative. No amount of deflection by trying to rebrand each point individually will make that go anyway.

I don't have time to run that experiment, and that wouldn't prove anything any way. Opinion polls don't tell us what the truth is about anything except opinions. There is no misogynistic narrative between the lines. That misogynists would exploit the facts I am presenting to push their narrative does not make me uttering those facts misogynistic. We cannot avoid certain ideas and discussions out of fear that bad peop…

> I don't have time to run that experiment

How surprising, I wonder why.

> Opinion polls don't tell us what the truth is about anything except opinions.

If you honestly believe that there's some sort of objective "exactly here is the line, don't cross it!" I feel bad for you.

> the facts I am presenting

Facts? It was a blatantly fact-free reply with your subjective "takes"; - "maybe the old times was better because I think women can't handle this new reality".

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