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Modern action films fetishize the body even as they desexualize it

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Re: Modern action films fetishize the body even as they desexualize it

#311

Post by 127 »

noofen wrote: post #157
theonemind wrote: post #34

Earlier quoted context omitted.

There are almost 7.7 billion people on the planet already, even with less than replacement birthrates, I think we're good on human count for the next 300 years or so at a minimum so unless the birth rate really catastrophically collapses. We could lose an order of magnitude of people without endangering genetic diversity, take significant load off of the environment, and frankly, quite probably improve the human cond…

There are going to be real, significant consequences from us as a Western society collectively deciding to commit civilizational suicide. Every day I see attractive, intelligent, productive, highly empathetic couples justifying their decision to not have children because of abstract "environmental concerns" amongst other decadent reasons (all highly abstract and indicative of civilization in decline, "first world lux…

It's a form of laziness, the most common of human behaviors. Deny, avoid, delay, until you're absolutely forced to do what is uncomfortable or painful.

Re: Modern action films fetishize the body even as they desexualize it

#312

Post by willhinsa »

throway98752343 wrote: post #260
throwaway198919 wrote: post #238

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm not OP but I'm not sexually active either and share the same worries and am probably a few years older than him. Thanks for sharing those videos, even though I was able to make that physique/style/life control transformation several times (get fit -> fall into a hole -> get fit again, rinse and repeat) during my 20s, this pandemic made me fall into a rut and I'm heavily struggling to stay on the right track that…

We all have to be extra kind to ourselves (and to each other) during the pandemic. It's an exceptionally unusual, transient time. Still, it is a long time to be socially distanced in various ways from coworkers, lovers, friends, etc. Things will get better soon. And yes, I'd imagine that a more similarly gendered and oriented therapist would find it easier to relate to your concerns. But maybe just being direct with…

Yes. Tell her directly, "I feel like you ignored my concerns about my sexual life," and see what she says. Beating around the bush in therapy (and in most of your important adult relationships) is almost always a waste of time.

Re: Modern action films fetishize the body even as they desexualize it

#313

Post by scruple »

ipaddr wrote: post #131
saithound wrote: post #82

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Others have explained why certain jobs are "segregated", and how sex work could plausibly fit into that category. But even if it does not, there's nothing we can learn about sex work from the reactions described above. Isn't it strange how most programmers think that specialist barista work is not demeaning, but would quit on the spot if they were instructed to serve morning coffee to the management? Oh wait, it's no…

At my salary I would welcome serving coffee while everyone is in the standup.

A quote that I picked up from my grandfather, "They pay me the same no matter what they've got me doing."

Re: Modern action films fetishize the body even as they desexualize it

#314

Post by aksss »

dingaling wrote: post #296
kenneth wrote: post #272

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Being sexually active is a choice. Nothing's stopping you from going out there and meeting people. There's plenty going on if you're willing to step out of your house and meet people. (And no, swiping on apps doesn't count.) (Pandemic lockdowns of course might get in the way, but I'm speaking generally when those restrictions aren't there)

For the vast majority of people it simply doesn't work like that. It's a long, expensive, seldom successful and generally frustrating experience which takes a toll on self-esteem. Unless you're in the top 20% or so of attractiveness.

Consider the plight of the humble salmon: Spend your whole life just for one chance to mate, most likely to be killed by other fish, eaten by bear, yanked out of your home via net or metal hook, it all smells like fish, and then you die on a gravelly shore with birds ripping your eyeballs out.

Re: Modern action films fetishize the body even as they desexualize it

#315

Post by pronlover723 »

astrange wrote: post #197
pronlover723 wrote: post #151

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Violence in media doesn't lead to violence in real life for various reasons. Most people are generally taught not to be violent to others and laws help enforce that social norm. Sex in media does lead to more sex real life because there's no social norm or law against not having sex and sex leads to STD and unwanted pregnancies. Hence, there is a logic to violence in media is okay and sex in media is less ok. One has…

I once read a reader question in a mainstream game magazine (GameInformer I think?) where they asked why it was ok for games to have violence but not sex. The answer was extremely angry they had to explain this, like a parent lecturing a child who'd just embarassed them in public. But anyway, their answer was the opposite of yours. Violence in games is good because you "shouldn't do it in real life". Sex in video gam…

That sounds like the same answer to me. As an adult you should have "responsible" sex in real life. So, sex in media with a young and irresponsible audience will lead to irresponsible sex and all the repercussions. Hence, the common idea, don't show kids sex.

Violence in media will not (or at least no one has been able to find a connection)

Re: Modern action films fetishize the body even as they desexualize it

#316

Post by 88840-8855 »

Thanks for the article, I like many parts of it.

On the other note, yet slightly related. I still wonder so much why men are still expected to build muscles to look good - at least in the developed Western world. How come females are expected to be skinny, which is slightly changing now with the body-positive movements, but men are still not considered to be attractive when they are skinny. Developed Asian economies see skinny guys are handsome.

Why is it not here yet? Will we completely skip this step and jump to a male body positive look immediately?

For me it does not make sense why skinny guys are not considered attractive, because being skinny (and sufficiently) sporty has significant benefits while the ripped bodies we are being sold in social media and movies require huge effort which can be very harmful to the body.

Re: Modern action films fetishize the body even as they desexualize it

#317

Post by prirun »

I have never understood why nudity and consensual sex - basically harmless activities - are deeply frowned on by the ratings groups, yet stabbing someone in the throat and having their blood gush out everywhere is fine and dandy.

Everyone knows that men have dicks. Why is seeing one such a big deal? Or a butt for that matter: everybody has one! It's no wonder our society is screwed up when it comes to our bodies. We learn shame for them at a very early age.

Most movies and shows have become so violent that I don't even look for new stuff anymore. If I want to waste some time at the TV I just go watch a Star Trek rerun rather than spending 45 minutes trying to find something to watch, then finding out it's gory and turning it off.

Re: Modern action films fetishize the body even as they desexualize it

#318

Post by edgyquant »

hirundo wrote: post #35

Is this a side effect of normalizing porn, that sexuality is more effectively partitioned? I once had a debate in an online forum about legalizing prostitution, and most participants were supportive of it. Then I asked the same group, what about legalizing partial prostitution, like a receptionist that also has sex with the boss as part of the job description. The participants all immediately switched to revulsion at…

The reason why “50%” sex work shouldn’t be legal is because job descriptions change over time so it could easily be the case that every attractive women with a male boss suddenly has to have sex with them or be fired for not completing their job description. Sure, a lot of women can quit, but exploitation already happens now when it is illegal so if the law was on the exploiters side things would only get worse.

Re: Modern action films fetishize the body even as they desexualize it

#319

Post by 127 »

planet-and-halo wrote: post #76
rayiner wrote: post #46

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> This stresses me out as a young and not sexually active millennial. What do we do as a society to improve some of these trends? Do we want to? What do I do as an individual to change my individual situation? Why do we need to? The data shows that sex, drug use, etc., actually peaked with baby boomers. They were peak frivolity. It’s only because they created all the media for decades that we think those were good th…

I'm not trying to glorify a life of reckless abandon, but in the context of the actual article, it's a little concerning to me that normal parts of human life like humor and sexuality seem to be a negative to you, and we should instead strive for "sobriety." That seems a rather grim view of human existence. I'm also not sure I can take seriously the notion that somehow this is a more serious moment in history than al…

In my opinion that (as a mainstream social narrative) is a false dilemma. The real division is between casual relationships and long relationships. The message I got as a young person is that casual sex should be celebrated and endorsed. That is a lie. Casual sex erodes long, meaningful relationships. It makes it that much harder to commit. Long relationships are how functional families are built. Functional families provide a bedrock to the society at large.

Re: Modern action films fetishize the body even as they desexualize it

#320

Post by edgyquant »

minxomat wrote: post #125
ZephyrBlu wrote: post #111

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm not american (Nor european) but I would still be extremely uncomfortable in an all-male shower let alone a unisex shower. I'm curious what you think the reasons that nudity is not as big of a deal to Europeans are.

I mean for one, a nude shower is the standard at pretty much all pools. Gender-separated most of the time, but still. From elementary school swimming lessons (which to be fair happen before pools open to the general public), to attending them as an adult, you drop all clothes when you enter and shower in one big room. Sure there might be partial walls for the extra shy, but most just don't care. Same goes for gym sho…

I’m American and the public pools I’ve been to are mostly not like this. They have individuals “cubicles” that you go into and then you can take close off and shower.
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