Why are fewer young adults having casual sex? • Hacker News Board

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#81

Post by ceilingcorner » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:31 PM UTC

metalliqaz wrote: post #67

ceilingcorner wrote: post #50

Earlier quoted context omitted.

No, not really. The modern western form of treating sex primarily as an entertainment activity is very much a new thing. Previously we had marriage and other cultural practices that aimed to channel these forces in productive directions. Now we just have PornHub and Tinder.

And certainly there was no such thing as backroom abortions, bastard sons, and the world's oldest profession, right?

All of those things occurred at much smaller percentages than they do today. Abortions especially.

They also weren’t seen as the primary purpose of sex.

Today, if you say something like “Sex is important and should only be done between people that are getting married, since it correlates with lower divorce rates”, most people will think you’re strange.

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#82

Post by dominotw » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:31 PM UTC

underseacables wrote: post #5

I think it is due to the misconception of an over abundance of choice. The apps trick us into believing that there is always someone better at the next swipe. So instead of having random hook ups, it could be that people are always waiting for the perfect, and thus having less casual sex.

> The apps trick us into believing that there is always someone better at the next swipe.

How though. Wouldn't you learn pretty fast that it isn't the case.

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#83

Post by scarmig » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:32 PM UTC

stonecraftwolf wrote: post #40

newsclues wrote: post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Dating apps suggest that a small group are having more sex and a larger group less sex. It’s the distribution of sex, not the amount. Technology has enabled the upper echelons of desirable men to sleep with many desirable women, and those down the pecking order are content with porn/toys, instead of settling for anyone other than the prized upper echelon. It’s not just the technology but the social change that result…

It’s extremely telling that you don’t bother to consider this from a woman’s POV, as though sex is some sort of fungible good to be distributed amongst men rather than something that results from two or more people expressing their agency. This is a deeply toxic set of assumptions that has its roots in the deeply misogynistic Incel culture.

If the poster had said "Technology has enabled women to choose to sleep with a more rarefied subset of men than in the past," many people would complain that it's incel rhetoric attributing the statistical distribution to conscious agency on the part of women.

Speaking in terms of distributions is the best way to handle this discussion, because people are more able to focus on the facts.

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#84

Post by chefkoch » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:32 PM UTC

stonecraftwolf wrote: post #40

newsclues wrote: post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Dating apps suggest that a small group are having more sex and a larger group less sex. It’s the distribution of sex, not the amount. Technology has enabled the upper echelons of desirable men to sleep with many desirable women, and those down the pecking order are content with porn/toys, instead of settling for anyone other than the prized upper echelon. It’s not just the technology but the social change that result…

It’s extremely telling that you don’t bother to consider this from a woman’s POV, as though sex is some sort of fungible good to be distributed amongst men rather than something that results from two or more people expressing their agency. This is a deeply toxic set of assumptions that has its roots in the deeply misogynistic Incel culture.

Why is that? It's the women who decide who of the men has sex. If a women is not considered unattraktive it's way easier for her to find someone (but most won't find that someone good enough) for casual sex.

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#85

Post by FreshFries » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:32 PM UTC

Lack of anonymity, is according to this one random person with loads of "good old times" experience and plenty of insights in the current "20 to 25 years old scene", the most important reason.

Where up to 10 years ago one could meet people and exchange kisses without even considering exchanging phone numbers, that is now not even an option anymore.

With the exchange of telno/FB/Insta, instantly there is no more "casual" relation, you are traceable and identifiable. One nightstands turn in to creepy ghosting or stalking really fast.

EDIT: completion of a sentence.

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#86

Post by hntrader » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:33 PM UTC

Armisael16 wrote: post #64

wittyreference wrote: post #23

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If they find no relationship between changing economic circumstances and the outcome, and but a positive relationship between likelihood of co-residence with parents and the outcome, the likelihood that they have made statistical blunders greatly outweighs the likelihood that changing economic circumstances do not play a role.

When looking at any one variable they’re controlling for the others.

Living with your parents and facing economic difficulty are going to be correlated. If they're included together in a multivariable regression (which is often what people mean when they say "controlling for") then they're going to have multicollinearity and it's not possible to disambiguate the unique role of one versus the other.

It's plausible that the former variable is "stealing" some of the statistical significance of the latter, leaving the researchers with the impression that the latter is irrelevant.

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#87

Post by covidthrow3 » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:33 PM UTC

ceilingcorner wrote: post #33

orange_tee wrote: post #25

The idea that casual sex serves as some sort of formative process sounds ridiculous. In my mind, sex serves an important role in pair bonding, and casual sex would then inhibit the ability of people to pair bond.

This is old wisdom, perpetually forgotten, recently remembered anew.

This is not old wisdom coming back, it's the dynamics of casual sex changing through dating and hook up apps.

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#88

Post by watwut » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:33 PM UTC

shams93 wrote: post #12

The key is more people forced to live with parents this doesn't just effect young people 78% of GenX are still forced to live at home. We have a society that is profoundly broken in so many ways.

Living with parents at least till marriage was the norm for large parts (majority) of population for large parts of history.

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#89

Post by [deleted] » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:33 PM UTC

stonecraftwolf wrote: post #40

newsclues wrote: post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Dating apps suggest that a small group are having more sex and a larger group less sex. It’s the distribution of sex, not the amount. Technology has enabled the upper echelons of desirable men to sleep with many desirable women, and those down the pecking order are content with porn/toys, instead of settling for anyone other than the prized upper echelon. It’s not just the technology but the social change that result…

It’s extremely telling that you don’t bother to consider this from a woman’s POV, as though sex is some sort of fungible good to be distributed amongst men rather than something that results from two or more people expressing their agency. This is a deeply toxic set of assumptions that has its roots in the deeply misogynistic Incel culture.

[deleted]

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#90

Post by ceilingcorner » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:34 PM UTC

metalliqaz wrote: post #65

bpodgursky wrote: post #41

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Young people having casual sex is the natural state of not just civilization, but the entire human species.

It amuses me when people wax poetic about a time long past, when people were chaste and pure. Ha! Hormones be hormones, and young people have been doing what they do for as long as there have been young people.

Do you think that social media, smart phones, and the Internet have had zero effect on behavior?