Why are fewer young adults having casual sex? • Hacker News Board

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#71

Post by [deleted] » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:29 PM UTC

stonecraftwolf wrote: post #40

newsclues wrote: post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Dating apps suggest that a small group are having more sex and a larger group less sex. It’s the distribution of sex, not the amount. Technology has enabled the upper echelons of desirable men to sleep with many desirable women, and those down the pecking order are content with porn/toys, instead of settling for anyone other than the prized upper echelon. It’s not just the technology but the social change that result…

It’s extremely telling that you don’t bother to consider this from a woman’s POV, as though sex is some sort of fungible good to be distributed amongst men rather than something that results from two or more people expressing their agency. This is a deeply toxic set of assumptions that has its roots in the deeply misogynistic Incel culture.

[deleted]

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#72

Post by perardi » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:29 PM UTC

Is there any reputable study or sources for the amount of casual sex among young homosexual men?

Because, anecdotally: plenty of casual sex.

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#73

Post by Armisael16 » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:29 PM UTC

Fricken wrote: post #48

uses wrote: post #27

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Gen X is people born between '65 and '80. You're saying that 78% of people, presumably in the US, who are currently between 41 and 56 are living with their parents?

52% of adults aged 18 to 29 live at home, the most since the great depression, according to this: https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2020/09/04/a-majority-...

What does that have to do with GenX?

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#74

Post by mywittyname » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:29 PM UTC

ovi256 wrote: post #53

nlbrown wrote: post #6

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm quite surprised to see that the leading theories in many of these studies revolve around competing forms of entertainment. I'm personally more concerned with how economic difficulty, mental health, and hormonal imbalances could be causing these sort of changes in society.

This study does not address hormonal changes, but I'd like to see the secular testosterone decline studied. Testosterone directly mediates sexual desire, so that should play a role.

You can want to have sex, but not have an available partner.

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#75

Post by lotsofpulp » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:30 PM UTC

robotastronaut wrote: post #39

shams93 wrote: post #12

The key is more people forced to live with parents this doesn't just effect young people 78% of GenX are still forced to live at home. We have a society that is profoundly broken in so many ways.

While I agree that there are many parts of our society that are broken, I don’t think that living with parents (or grandparents) is part of that. If anything, I think the constant pressure to be fully independent by the time you’re in your early 20s is the indicator. In much of the world, it’s very common and even encouraged to live with previous generations, sometimes after marriage. There are a ton of benefits from…

> In much of the world, it’s very common and even encouraged to live with previous generations, sometimes after marriage. There are a ton of benefits from this arrangement, including built-in care for younger and older folks, better ability to save, etc.

My parents’ generation comes from a country where it’s common for married couples to live with the parents. All the cousins who are economically able to moved out to their own house. The only married couples living with their parents are the ones whose parents can’t afford to live alone, or who themselves can’t afford to live alone.

And unless more soundproof rooms become the norm, I can easily see why a young couple would not want to live in the same house as their parents. Most Americans houses are drywall, and nothing in between and sound really travels. As far as I can tell, having parents down the road, but in a separate house is the ideal.

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#76

Post by cashewchoo » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:30 PM UTC

quacked wrote: post #46

Modern casual sexual encounters are assessed purely on subjective ratings of the opposite party's sexual attractiveness (secondary sexual characteristics, behavior, social status, etc.). Furthermore, constant saturation into the full range of these behaviors and characteristics across humanity through the internet and dating applications creates a endless "could I get a better mate?" feedback loop in the minds of bot…

One thing I'm deeply thankful for is that I was engaged coming out of college to the woman of my dreams, and that Tinder didn't really fully catch on until I was already seriously dating my now-wife.

The modern dating market sounds like one of the most depressing aspects of modern adult society.

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#77

Post by durnygbur » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:31 PM UTC

What is sex? I remember studying abroad in Europe around 2010 and browsing dating websites from desperation, apparently my character, appearance, status, and ethnicity combined into attractivenes of zero. Hadn't even imagined that apps will be created which will turn the desperation in an absolute vacuum, vacuum trying to suck out the money from me with subscriptions.

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#78

Post by watwut » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:31 PM UTC

jawns wrote: post #21

nlbrown wrote: post #6

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm quite surprised to see that the leading theories in many of these studies revolve around competing forms of entertainment. I'm personally more concerned with how economic difficulty, mental health, and hormonal imbalances could be causing these sort of changes in society.

The study talks about how more young people are residing with their parents because of economic difficulty, but I'm not sure that's necessarily a major factor in the decline. Many people become sexually active before they move out of their parents' houses, and although it might be more challenging to find a private space, where there's a will, there's a way. Teenagers have been sneaking around to fool around for gene…

The argument is not that it is impossible to have sex when you live with parents. It is that you are less likely to have casual sex if you live with them.

Where you would have had it, if you lived alone, you wont bother overcoming the "more challenging to find a private space" situation.

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#79

Post by justaman » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:31 PM UTC

bpodgursky wrote: post #41

ceilingcorner wrote: post #22

No mention of any cultural shifts or changing attitudes, as if young people having casual sex was just the natural state of civilization and not something that became celebrated and artificially encouraged via the media in the last half-century. Tinder and other online dating options are pretty bleak and inherently extractive in nature, so I find it equally plausible that many young people are simply turned off from…

Young people having casual sex is the natural state of not just civilization, but the entire human species.

I think there is an argument that civilization as we have come to know it was not based on casual sex, rather pair-bonding.

Re: Why are fewer young adults having casual sex?

#80

Post by DC1350 » Wed, Mar 03, 2021, 3:31 PM UTC

The obvious reason is that in a perfectly efficient sexual market the biggest stud has sex with all the women. Most men are unattractive so they don’t get to participate in casual sex. Instagram and Tinder mean there’s no such thing as just settling with what’s available anymore.