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How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

durmonski.com

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Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#61

Post by cambalache »

st1x7 wrote: post #48

It's ironic that the image of a rat race that came into my head after reading the title was exactly what the author proposes as an alternative at the end of the article - comparing yourself to others and constantly trying to upgrade your skills and yourself.

Yeah, humans fight and care about money, but they do that with the same intensity about status/prestige. See all the silly fights in academic circles, in open source projects in non-profit organizations. Most people will fight to the bitter end for an ounce of prestige and recognition.

Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#62

Post by saiya-jin »

offtop5 wrote: post #41

>The extra you’re paying for a Porche, for example, has more to do with the message you want to convey to others, not with the usefulness of the product itself. One of my best friends, who does better dating wise than anyone I know, drove a 98 Volvo. He was making well over 150k, but had so much quiet confidence he had no need to project anything. I make a similar amount, still wear clothes from Old Navy and when I d…

I got an issue with this common trope about fast cars bought only by clueless folks who compensate their messed up childhood or rather small body parts in some way.

Have you guys actually properly driven (ideally on track) proper race-ish car? Porsche has several models which are kind of you can take on normal roads for long drives and drive race track with great success/fun. Basically 911s above 400 hp with rear wheel drive or best caymans. Not many in that category and price levels. Actually typical american muscle car is more in the 'doesn't make sense' category since whole added value is just straight line performance, not overall driving quality. Maybe too european view but definitely common.

They might be minority in terms of sales, but those folks are out there. And they drive new models too.

Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#63

Post by ozim »

I don't see this article as eye opening or valuable.

For me it looks like bait for people who would summarize themselves as "I watched Fightclub and I am better than sheepeople".

Buying Porsche is not an issue for most of the people, so maybe audience for this article is "childless young professionals, who just sold a startup". Let alone most of the people I see that own a Porsche are 50+, that probably already have a big house and bunch of kids. Those people live on different planet and still they are nowhere near to 1% of the richest.

I see most of people are already committed to long term goals like rising children, buying a house. It takes for them a lot of time to achieve those goals. It is the silent majority that wakes up goes to work and just live their lives. All those people that realized, they will never buy a Porsche an what is even more important they don't need one.

I would say more eye opening would be: Presenting how much of that fake lifestyle is promoted and presented by media, social or otherwise, compared to how many people don't care and live normal life of paying off mortgage, being happy about an ice cream they were able to afford.

Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#64

Post by khalilravanna »

noisem4ker wrote: post #57
khalilravanna wrote: post #50

I’m so happy I made the mistake of buying a BMW with the money from my first software engineering job. I learned in my 20s that money buys very little short term happiness. And then you’re stuck with a loan and a “cool” car that you’ve normalized into “just another car”. So happy I made that mistake early and now I can puerilely laugh with a bit of schadenfreude whenever I see an expensive car knowing the owner loved…

The decay slope of happiness depends on personality. I still feel glad I splurged for expensive stuff I really liked ten years ago, and still like now. Part of it is emotional inertia, but it's probably also correlated with the fact I don't do impulse buying, am wary of advertisements and thoroughly research prior to parting with money.

There's absolutely nuance. I think it's like you say, the mindset. If you purchase something because you want something that's "nicer than everyone else's", you'll be unhappy. You're inherently fighting a losing battle. Not only that but a petty battle.

If you instead, similar to how you describe, invest in something that you want to hold onto for a long time, that's a much better proposition. I have one expensive pair of boots. But I love them. I've had them for years. I treat the leather and polish them fairly frequently. I get them resoled. I expect they'll last me the rest of my life. Couldn't be happier with the purchase.

Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#65

Post by lotsofpulp »

bobthepanda wrote: post #34
lotsofpulp wrote: post #29

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This works without kids. If you have kids, then typically you desire to give them the best available options, and that then means living in higher priced neighborhoods with higher achieving student populations. And then your kid befriends another kid whose parents are doctors/lawyers/engineers/business owners, and they want to don vacation or camp with them and you need to pony up a few hundred or thousand dollars an…

Even so, there’s a lot of decently affordable “good enough” where the difference between that and “best available” is marginal compared to the cost increase. The most obvious and probably biggest expense item (at least in the US) would be tertiary education, but having been out a few years I don’t really notice what the additional benefit was of top-tier private university vs cheap state university, since I know plen…

It gets pretty subjective when talking about which benefits are worth what, but in general, the more resourceful your network is, the more resources you have.

There probably is a point where "best available" isn't worth it, but I think for many people, they still feel that they need to do whatever they can. NYC is a great example, where unless your kid makes it into Stuyvesant or Brooklyn Tech or equivalent, many higher income parents feel compelled to move to the suburbs. Or even the current uproar where they diminished the testing to get into those schools.

Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#66

Post by cambalache »

georgeecollins wrote: post #9

I really like this point of view, but it is important to point out that the bar for happiness in life and relationships (as a proxy for "reproduction) is way below our aspirations. You aren't really trying to be like Instagram influenceres because of your "selfish gene". Your "selfish gene" would do better directing you toward fundamentalist communities where reproductive rates are higher. No, you are being influence…

> Your "selfish gene" would do better directing you toward fundamentalist communities where reproductive rates are higher.

That's not like the selfish gene theory work at all. In species where sex is involved, the "quality" of the genes of your partner is as much as important for the destiny of your genes as the fact you are reproducing. That's why sports stars and millionaires marry and have kids with beautiful models instead of getting pregnant 1000 plain Janes.

It does not make so much sense since in modern society the survival rate is pretty high, but as the usually repeated mantra says ;"we humans are machines living in the current world with a 200k-year-old firmware "

Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#67

Post by cambalache »

tstrimple wrote: post #40
birdsbirdsbirds wrote: post #26

This article is not about escaping the rat race but about winning it. Reinvesting and having long-term goals is just the best strategy to make the most. It's kind of doubling down on the rat race. The status game is actually a valid strategy since, unlike developers, most people don't live in a merit-based society. Strong people associate with strong people. So whoever needs resources also has to appear strong. For n…

Maybe I'm missing something, but I don't think there is anything at all about developers which would set them apart from the hoi polloi. The vast majority of developers do not live in a merit based society. They are just as much subject to the requirements of appearing strong as anyone else. They have to pitch to win, just like anyone else.

>Maybe I'm missing something, but I don't think there is anything at all about developers which would set them apart from the hoi polloi.

Maybe their arrogance and inflated self-importance. But, then again, the hoi polloi are like that too.

Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#68

Post by cambalache »

AlexandrB wrote: post #16
fairity wrote: post #5

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Regardless of whether or not it accurately explains the term’s origin or true meaning, the Venn diagram seems to present the more compelling idea.

I disagree. The Venn diagram version positions satisfaction as contingent on things you cannot possibly control ("That Which the World Needs" and "That Which You Can be Paid For"). This is a recipe for perpetual unhappiness and dissatisfaction for most.

Not only that, Do you want for someone to "deeply care about something"? pay them a lot to work on that.That's it.We are masters on deluding ourselves with post-hoc rationalizations.

Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#69

Post by broberts01 »

ozim wrote: post #63

I don't see this article as eye opening or valuable. For me it looks like bait for people who would summarize themselves as "I watched Fightclub and I am better than sheepeople". Buying Porsche is not an issue for most of the people, so maybe audience for this article is "childless young professionals, who just sold a startup". Let alone most of the people I see that own a Porsche are 50+, that probably already have…

The article is highlighting that the rat race is really just trying to be perceived as wealthy and give off a good image by purchasing more and better things.

I think the "silent majority that wakes up goes to work and just lives their lives" is not a majority. Sure, people go to work but they are trying to make money to buy more things to show what they have. They don't necessarily need it to be a Porsche. The "luxury" goods that many people like to show off are as simple as a big screen TV.

Re: How to Escape the Modern Rat Race

#70

Post by lotsofpulp »

offtop5 wrote: post #41

>The extra you’re paying for a Porche, for example, has more to do with the message you want to convey to others, not with the usefulness of the product itself. One of my best friends, who does better dating wise than anyone I know, drove a 98 Volvo. He was making well over 150k, but had so much quiet confidence he had no need to project anything. I make a similar amount, still wear clothes from Old Navy and when I d…

Perhaps you and your friend are status signaling by signaling you don't have to status signal.
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