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I was tricked into thinking I had “grit”

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Re: I was tricked into thinking I had “grit”

#61

Post by ct520 »

ardit33 wrote: post #14
jimbob45 wrote: post #11

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's not impossible...but it requires strict time management and everyone else in your life will try to steal your earmarked time and complain that you never want to do anything. Even then, I agree - I'm constantly accidentally over prioritizing and having to even back out.

yeah, it is physically impossible.... I gave you two disciplines: bulking up in the gym, or playing soccer... while bulking up, you gain both muscle and some fat, and your soccer performance will suffer as your weight will increase, and your larger biceps and pecs really wont help your soccer game much (there is a reason that pro soccer players don't look like body builders). Also playing lots of soccer will hurt you…

*Steroids enters the room. Steroids: someone say they can’t bulk and cut? Hold my beer.

Re: I was tricked into thinking I had “grit”

#62

Post by ct520 »

onion2k wrote: post #52
hef19898 wrote: post #40

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You are dscribing a perfect way for an early burn-out and a lonely life. Relationships are one of the most important things in life, and I say this as a guy who could litteraly not talk to anyone for two weeks strait. It's relationships with people that get you your first customers for your start-up, your key employees. relationships keep you down to earth, friends and fmily. The latter being one of the most importan…

I didn't say that you should say no to everything . I said you should develop the ability to say no to things that you don't want to do because you have more important things to spend your time on. Trying to make everyone around you happy by giving up time you want to spend on important things is a much quicker route to burn out than declining some meetings you don't care about.

I hate to say amongst the commenters I don’t think your opinion is a popular one here. I agree with you.

Re: I was tricked into thinking I had “grit”

#63

Post by oska »

doublesCs wrote: post #38

I have learned the same thing about myself: I am (relatively) successful not because my grit allowed me to keep doing something which I disliked but were rewarded, but because the things I enjoy doing are things which are valued by our society. I realized this after reading the following Warren Buffet quote[1]: "I happen to have a talent for allocating capital. But my ability to use that talent is completely dependen…

Somehow I think Buffett would have ended up a parasite in any society. There's always been a niche for the Buffett type.

Re: I was tricked into thinking I had “grit”

#64

Post by CalRobert »

ardit33 wrote: post #8

It is impossible to be really good at everything.... when I optimized for work, my fitness goals went through the window. When I optimized to get a project done, my reading (books) went down as well. When I optimized for fitness (working out and soccer), my work and side projects started progressing slower. It is very hard to work on your project at home, when you are in a intense bulking, or 'cutting' phase, and onc…

Then you have a kid and realize just how much free time you actually had...

Re: I was tricked into thinking I had “grit”

#65

Post by grenoire »

mikekchar wrote: post #41
ardit33 wrote: post #8

It is impossible to be really good at everything.... when I optimized for work, my fitness goals went through the window. When I optimized to get a project done, my reading (books) went down as well. When I optimized for fitness (working out and soccer), my work and side projects started progressing slower. It is very hard to work on your project at home, when you are in a intense bulking, or 'cutting' phase, and onc…

I have a "rule of 3". You can be quite good at 3 things (give or take). One of them will probably be your job. One will probably be your relationships. You have time for 1 more. If you keep changing your mind about what that last one will be, then you will only be good at 2 things. There are ways to be good at only 1 thing as well.... or even 0...

Very much in line with my experience, but in fact for me it wasn't even 'being quite good at,' but just sufficiently managing and exceeding minimum expectations. In my college years that was, for example, studying, working, and managing the faculty magazine. I had no time to give to friends or socialise even. Relationships are definitely taking up one of these 'slots,' so to say.

Re: I was tricked into thinking I had “grit”

#67

Post by CalRobert »

Cthulhu_ wrote: post #49
ardit33 wrote: post #8

It is impossible to be really good at everything.... when I optimized for work, my fitness goals went through the window. When I optimized to get a project done, my reading (books) went down as well. When I optimized for fitness (working out and soccer), my work and side projects started progressing slower. It is very hard to work on your project at home, when you are in a intense bulking, or 'cutting' phase, and onc…

I've never thought of myself as being particularly "gritty" in anything; for me personally, mediocrity is good enough. I'm boring in that I get up and go to bed at reasonable times, in that I play video games for a couple hours at most, then I think I've had enough. I'm not trying to humblebrag, it's not something I do conscientiously, my main point here is that not excelling, not "doing your best" is also fine. In a…

Unfortunately those same people also push others (or worse, their direct reports) to burn out as fast or faster than themselves.

Re: I was tricked into thinking I had “grit”

#68

Post by bl4ckm0r3 »

Just a comment, that i don't want to sound as a critique or a judgement of any kind...there's is a great value in re-evaluating and without this step the "grit" becomes easily stubbornness...BUT it's also very important not to use the "re-evaluation" to mask or hide 1) lack of clear objectives (why am I doing this thing that i don't particularly enjoy) 2) laziness (it's sooooooo easy to fall into the "i'll do it tomorrow" mentality).

But honestly having a clear objective and a reasoning behind achieving it that we believe in and you get all the grit you need to achieve it!

The gym is the classic example, most people sign up but they aren't too convinced about it...why are you there?where are you trying to get?will this reasoning motivate you after the initial "this is not bad" or "hey I am improving quickly" phase?

ps disclaimer I don't go to the gym (but I do other sports)

Re: I was tricked into thinking I had “grit”

#69

Post by xz0r »

ardit33 wrote: post #8

It is impossible to be really good at everything.... when I optimized for work, my fitness goals went through the window. When I optimized to get a project done, my reading (books) went down as well. When I optimized for fitness (working out and soccer), my work and side projects started progressing slower. It is very hard to work on your project at home, when you are in a intense bulking, or 'cutting' phase, and onc…

I'd argue, its not impossible. There might be people who are able to manage everything, we just don't know.
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