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For people with an abusive partner, lockdown means captivity

theguardian.com

171–180 of 193 posts

Re: For people with an abusive partner, lockdown means captivity

#171
post #28
post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Hmm, lets see. You could go the opposite way. Advertise for them everywhere. Put up signs for cheap stuff in other turfs. Let the free market work. Now is the problem the people below or where you live? Getting rid of thek might bring someone worse. Sounds like you have grown out of the area.

Putting up signs is not so simple with CCTV everywhere.

Not an issue as I know all the CCTV and how to locate them easily enough as well as able to take them out. However there are other junkies in area and they all work together with the CCTV controlled by them, which they use to monitor police etc and stay ahead of them. I jest you not, it's shocking.

Re: For people with an abusive partner, lockdown means captivity

#172
post #7

I'm Stuck in a flat above heroin/crack abusers, they have dealers in all the time, abuse the victim card and keep getting away with it. Police, council.... all just victimhood them and dispite over years and years of having hard evidence, they just ignore it. Equally the partner of the women had a business, working and she got him hooked on the stuff, she's abusive, killing him and nobody over the years seems to care…

> I'm now at stage that I need a good investigative reporter as I have recordings and other proofs... No, you don't. Nobody cares about crackheads. Furthermore, nobody cares about your problems, either. Not the police, not the welfare services, not the media, not even the people on HN. Nobody is going to call to get the details on this story as it unfolds. You need to get out. Things may look hopeless. Perhaps they a…

Sadly the only avenue would be public exposure of this and that alas would bury under current events. Also the process could very well kill me anyway due to stress/heart. But that's happening anyhow, I'm close to the edge and would rather go out knowing justice lives than not.

Moving - see other responses, covered that.

Only way forward would be a reporter who wants a big story or availing illegal avenues of which I have over the years, formulated many, including the perfect murder.

But it's not as easy as it sounds and sadly hard to articulate all the aspects and details.

But I will see the whole lots of those who failed me and these scum justiced, one way or another. It's my only way forward as even if could move, I'd have no closure and the horrors would live on, I need closure or I'm stuck living this wherever I went and sadly there is not option for that - see other reply's.

Re: For people with an abusive partner, lockdown means captivity

#173
post #45

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Our current society worships victims, but unfortunately your kind of victim is not numerous enough to get mainstream attention.

Interestingly enough, our society worships victims that either could not be helped, or that would take a lower-than-median place in the social ladder after the help arrived. It's like people feel better when they hear about someone who's life is more miserable than theirs. Asperger dude who could become extremely productive and wealthy once he assigns the right priorities to sleep, noise reduction, and seeing through…

I had a good career, done some amazing things, but utterly shite art remuneration and got taken advantage of by many employers and mate-crime, also not a greedy person, and been told I'm too good natured for my own good, too intelligent for my own good and that's by many professionals and smart people, sadly that's all they could do beyond say that I've done all the right things and been failed.

SLeep the issue, they live vampire hours and terrible flat for noise and with that, it's a slow death.

When I accepted this place I asked: 1) I need a silent area at night 2) No heroin users as had issue in past

I was lied to and suffered ever since, apparently downstairs is the biggest known crackhead heroin user in the area and been instrumental in bringing heroin into the area and with that, it's been downhill ever since at a time I didn't need it and now I'm mid 50's, burned out so many times, physical and mental health issues, I'm spent and never going to get back to full time work and even then. I have no stability in routine due to antisocial impacts that still happen to this day and....see other comments.

Re: For people with an abusive partner, lockdown means captivity

#174
post #45

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Our current society worships victims, but unfortunately your kind of victim is not numerous enough to get mainstream attention.

People don't worship victims, they use victims as means to some end, like attaining political power or social capital. By extension, victims must stay victims to keep fulfilling that purpose.

You know what, you're kinda right as that would explain so much, more victims they have, bigger budgets, it's just....so so wrong.

Re: For people with an abusive partner, lockdown means captivity

#175
post #7

I'm Stuck in a flat above heroin/crack abusers, they have dealers in all the time, abuse the victim card and keep getting away with it. Police, council.... all just victimhood them and dispite over years and years of having hard evidence, they just ignore it. Equally the partner of the women had a business, working and she got him hooked on the stuff, she's abusive, killing him and nobody over the years seems to care…

>So nobody dares do anything as they have lost faith in the police and all support. >I have aspergers and have serious PTSD due to years of this abuse and need help getting the truth out there. Here's one uncomfortable fact about our society that most people sort of feel, but don't usually express in words. Despite what people say, nobody gives a damn about others' problems. People will tell you all kinds of kind and…

I have thought this out way more over the years and trust me - the only way forward would be public humiliation from somebody that would traction and with that.

I need a reporter who will listen and be listened too.

I have 2 years worth of recordings and with that, many examples of police ineptness, abuse.... the lot and nobody takes me seriously.

EVen played audio of her dealing, threateneing...and short version, they did nothing. Also many corrupt police, shocking but you do find out the hard way and so many inept police, shocking again, well less so in todays over-woke climate and sadly nothing constructive happens.

However this whole coronavirus, well, sad when that is doing more than I could to highlight the issues and more so, makes it harder for them to get the drugs, so I'm taking solice and great comfort in their suffering currently, sad I know but if you know all I've had to endure, it's enabled me to cope more in talking about this and trying again.

Heck, even dug out police home and private numbers and lets just say, they are useless, but hey, I feel better for it. Share the stress :).

Re: For people with an abusive partner, lockdown means captivity

#176

In addition, sadly there are nearly 0 shelters for men. https://nypost.com/2017/10/29/these-shelters-help-male-victi...

For better or worse, it's hard to imagine there'd be much demand (even if there's arguably need). I've been in a situation sort of like this, and reaching out to a shelter would have been the last thought on my mind. Rather, we're pretty much taught and shamed into "sucking it up", both by women and men. That's usually what happens, and those who no longer can generally just end up as statistics.

While you're correct about the social conditioning, I think it's a ecosystem sort of feedback loop. "Real men dont need shelters" so then we dont make them. So then when men need shelters they think "See? Other men dont need them, I must suck it up and be a realmens"

Re: For people with an abusive partner, lockdown means captivity

#177
post #102
post #89

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That’s probably because your perception is that it is a derailment.

It's a derailment because the people bringing this up aren't actually organizing towards helping homeless men. These two issues, women's shelters and men's shelters, aren't actually in contradiction with each other but the commenter I was responding to is treating it that way. The reason women's shelters exist is because activists in the 60's and 70's decided to build them and gain support, and eventually fought for…

> What is stopping any of you from actually building a movement to help homeless men, instead of complaining about the activists who try to help women in need of housing?

Maybe ^^ is afraid of misandry and people like you who get angry/offensive when someone wants to help men as though it's a competition about who has it worse.

see: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Women_are_wonderful_effect

Re: For people with an abusive partner, lockdown means captivity

#178

Earlier quoted context omitted.

For better or worse, it's hard to imagine there'd be much demand (even if there's arguably need). I've been in a situation sort of like this, and reaching out to a shelter would have been the last thought on my mind. Rather, we're pretty much taught and shamed into "sucking it up", both by women and men. That's usually what happens, and those who no longer can generally just end up as statistics.

While you're correct about the social conditioning, I think it's a ecosystem sort of feedback loop. "Real men dont need shelters" so then we dont make them. So then when men need shelters they think "See? Other men dont need them, I must suck it up and be a realmens"

I do think they should exist (and be publicized).

Re: For people with an abusive partner, lockdown means captivity

#179
post #34
post #28

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Putting up signs is not so simple with CCTV everywhere.

Was thinking in bathrooms vs polls.. less large signs but more scratching something out with a key. In places where people use the bathroom to shootup (targeted advertising works better with a better roi)

Makeup of housing in the UK somewhat different to your vision alas.

Don't get me wrong, I've done things and had some success.

Was entire ground floor of the 6 flats all junkies, one I managed to re-educate, another I socially engineered away.

2 corrupt coppers removed.

4 Gangs removed

Numerous habitual junkies - removed from area.

2 gangs removed from area via blackmail.

Probably missing few.

But I've not been idle and had some positive results, albeit using craft tricks, so bit grey legally but morally just.

However the real issue does seem to be a police informer, did have some limited success last year, managed to socially engineer two gangs and with that, they ended up taking each other out and also saw the downstairs issue beaten up. That managed to give me a break but they always get back to the same old same and with that, the only way is to out them and the police handler for the shite they have caused.

But for closure - I need them and the police handler publicly outed in a way that they can't cover and with that, need publicity to deal with them and in a way that sends a message to the police so they don't do it again.

So yeah, messy, but need to end-game this for my own health and see it thru for closure and for my health overall.

Hence, best solution would be a reporter I can trust and is respectable to traction this. That simple.

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